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Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

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  • Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

    Assalam Alayykum

    Is ambition in career an important part of what you look for in a husband? I ask because Ive had this issue for quite a few potentials - with the latest one this point was probably the main reason that we called it off as it was becoming a major point.

    I dont have ANY ambition when it comes to my career - to put it basically...I dont care. Thats not to say im lazy or I dont work hard - Im saying I have no interest in career progression and making it big.

    If I pursued my career in the subject of my degree, I could have potentially lucrative salary...I mean really well paid - but I hated my degree and have no desire to follow that path - Im quite happy in a poorly paid job, barely above the national minimum wage because i enjoy it. Plus its not stressful or boring and gives me free time to do other things.

    Ive realised Iv had this issue of lack of ambition with all potential partners apart from 1 - so is this really important for sisters? If so, whats so important about it. Money? Power? Its something I dont understand.

  • #2
    Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

    Cant speak for all sisters - but I find it a very important characteristic in a man.
    https://sufisticated101.wordpress.com

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    • #3
      Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

      can you expand on why a little

      somethings i understand why they can be important, religiousness, character, manners, looks, personality, wealth - this one i dont really understand

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      • #4
        Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

        What is "ambition" in a guy suppose to mean ? is that like having a well paid job or being a doctor/engineer?

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        • #5
          Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

          Originally posted by Matro View Post
          What is "ambition" in a guy suppose to mean ? is that like having a well paid job or being a doctor/engineer?
          yes - thats my experience of what sisters say anywa

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          • #6
            Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

            Originally posted by -Shamil- View Post
            can you expand on why a little

            somethings i understand why they can be important, religiousness, character, manners, looks, personality, wealth - this one i dont really understand
            For me the most important quality in a man was his manners/piety.

            However, a close second was his ambition.

            Ambition to me an extremely attractive quality found in a man...it points to his self confidence and self esteem...it also gives me assurance of financial stability for our future.

            Ambition can lead to power, leadership, a self assured personality etc etc

            All qualities that I find extremely attractive in a man.
            https://sufisticated101.wordpress.com

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            • #7
              Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

              Originally posted by LondonGal View Post
              For me the most important quality in a man was his manners/piety.

              However, a close second was his ambition.

              Ambition to me an extremely attractive quality found in a man...it points to his self confidence and self esteem...it also gives me assurance of financial stability for our future.

              Ambition can lead to power, leadership, a self assured personality etc etc

              All qualities that I find extremely attractive in a man.
              I honestly dont see how confidence, esteem. self-assuredness are related to ambition esp as no ambition in career does not mean no ambition for the akhirah or for other aspects of life

              I understand the power and leadership bit tho - you'd need some sort of ambition in your chosen field to achieve them. Plus you would have to be willing to sacrifice for your career and that is one thing that is defintely not worth sacrificing for imo.

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              • #8
                Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                Yes he should have ambition I would encourage it.

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                • #9
                  Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                  Yes it's important but not that much, i don't want a man who's obssessed with his career, not attractive at all. Yet i don't want someone who has no ambitions, that's not attractive either.
                  The life of this world is only the enjoyment of deception (a deceiving thing)” (3:185)

                  Avoid excessive laughter and useless arguments as they harden the heart and lead to heedlessness.

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                  • #10
                    Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                    i wouldnt need progression, but i would like him to have a stable wage, i dont want to have to worry, im a bit neurotic

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                    • #11
                      Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                      Originally posted by LondonGal View Post
                      For me the most important quality in a man was his manners/piety.

                      However, a close second was his ambition.

                      Ambition to me an extremely attractive quality found in a man...it points to his self confidence and self esteem...it also gives me assurance of financial stability for our future.

                      Ambition can lead to power, leadership, a self assured personality etc etc

                      All qualities that I find extremely attractive in a man.
                      Ambition does not necessarily means he will be rich. Most people have the ambition to be rich, but ambition must be a) grounded in reality ie the person's natural abilities and b) backed up by action. For example, I suck at soccer, so it would be idiotic for me to have ambitions of being a world famous footballer.

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                      • #12
                        Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                        Brother Shamil, are you asking sisters about worldly ambition or deeni ambition? Or both?

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                        • #13
                          Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                          Originally posted by Vitriolic_Sage View Post
                          Ambition does not necessarily means he will be rich. Most people have the ambition to be rich, but ambition must be a) grounded in reality ie the person's natural abilities and b) backed up by action. For example, I suck at soccer, so it would be idiotic for me to have ambitions of being a world famous footballer.
                          Of course.

                          Ambition not back up with realism and actions is not ambition.

                          I want a lot of things in life - but what actually matters is what I'm actively trying to pursue.
                          https://sufisticated101.wordpress.com

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                            Originally posted by Vitriolic_Sage View Post
                            Brother Shamil, are you asking sisters about worldly ambition or deeni ambition? Or both?
                            was asking about worldly ambition bro - specificly career ambition

                            i honestly cant think of anything more pointless and more useless to spend all your time and energy on than your career

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                            • #15
                              Re: Sisters - Is Ambition an Important Characteristic in a Guy?

                              Originally posted by -Shamil- View Post
                              was asking about worldly ambition bro - specificly career ambition

                              i honestly cant think of anything more pointless and more useless to spend all your time and energy on than your career
                              My husband puts in time and energy into his deen and his career Alhamdulillah. According to you he is doing something useless and pointless?
                              Mrs B

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