Ads by Muslim Ad Network

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Rejecting a Potential Because of Their Student Loans

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Rejecting a Potential Because of Their Student Loans

    Many people I know have student loans they took to pay their way through college/university. I'm not going to debate whether it's permissible or not because I'm pretty sure it's not. Regardless, most people still take the loans (even I did). I worked while I was studying though and paid off my $20k+ loans a few months after graduating.

    Now, when looking at potential sisters for marriage, I realized many of them still have student loans that are unpaid. Some of them haven't worked and have just been doing post graduate studies and have very large sums of money owing. Ideally, I don't want to marry someone with high levels of debt but it seems to be so common. How much debt is too much for you? Would you reject a good proposal because of how much they owe?

  • #2
    Re: Rejecting a Potential Because of Their Student Loans

    Originally posted by Simple Guy View Post
    Many people I know have student loans they took to pay their way through college/university. I'm not going to debate whether it's permissible or not because I'm pretty sure it's not. Regardless, most people still take the loans (even I did). I worked while I was studying though and paid off my $20k+ loans a few months after graduating.

    Now, when looking at potential sisters for marriage, I realized many of them still have student loans that are unpaid. Some of them haven't worked and have just been doing post graduate studies and have very large sums of money owing. Ideally, I don't want to marry someone with high levels of debt but it seems to be so common. How much debt is too much for you? Would you reject a good proposal because of how much they owe?
    assalaamu alaykum,

    why would you? it is their debt not your's. ok better to help a debter,and closer to home you give charity the better but nothing obliging you to pay off her debt.

    what would be a serious problem would be if she considered the taking of riba based loans to be permissable, i would rather marry a sister with 10million debts than one who has non and contradicts the rules of islam on riba AND considers this to be permissable,

    people make mistakes but they make tawbah, the worse are those who dont make tawbah.
    Daw'ud... is retired from ummah forum

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Rejecting a Potential Because of Their Student Loans

      If you're wife has debts, I guess in a way they're your debts too. If she does't have a job you'll have to pay it off.

      It sounds irresponsible of a woman to be sitting with debts and not even working part time in a effort to pay off her own loans, that she took on of her own free choice.

      I would stay away from a woman that racks up debts and then sits at home expecting her future husband to pay them off. Or even a guy, if he's taking out loan after loan and has made no plans about how he's going to pay them back seems to be lacking a sense of responsibility, and maturity and probably isn't ready for marriage anyway.

      Although it's true that someone who has made a mistake and done taubah is better than someone who doesn't know when they've sinned, however from the above example, if a woman had unpaid debts, and then took another loan out to do a post grad degree, she hasn't realised her mistake.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Rejecting a Potential Because of Their Student Loans

        dawud_uk, you are financially resposible for your wife and kids. So why shouldn't include her debts?
        Please Re-update your Signature

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Rejecting a Potential Because of Their Student Loans

          I have never thought about this but I think i will ask a sister how much money she owes.
          Please Re-update your Signature

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Rejecting a Potential Because of Their Student Loans

            Originally posted by mars16 View Post
            dawud_uk, you are financially resposible for your wife and kids. So why shouldn't include her debts?
            you are financially responsible for making sure she has enough food to eat, a roof over her head and buying her clothes whenever you buy for yourself that is not the same as being financially resonsible in the way you meant it.

            i am not saying dont pay off her debts, just it is not a must.
            Daw'ud... is retired from ummah forum

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Rejecting a Potential Because of Their Student Loans

              Ive never thought about this issue. A very good point, but the question is: who doesnt hasnt taken loans to study in the UK? Im sure most people have. I think when i go university I will take the student loan, if my parents cant pay, but Ive always intended that as soon as i get job, Ill pay the money back. Before i buy my own car, house etc, pay the money back.

              I would probably now - after realising this issue- will ask the potential husband if he has debts, how much, and what plans he has to repay back the money. Unless its a HUGE amount of money, I wouldnt reject a good religous guy.

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Rejecting a Potential Because of Their Student Loans

                Originally posted by BintelIisam View Post
                Ive never thought about this issue. A very good point, but the question is: who doesnt hasnt taken loans to study in the UK? Im sure most people have. I think when i go university I will take the student loan, if my parents cant pay, but Ive always intended that as soon as i get job, Ill pay the money back. Before i buy my own car, house etc, pay the money back.

                I would probably now - after realising this issue- will ask the potential husband if he has debts, how much, and what plans he has to repay back the money. Unless its a HUGE amount of money, I wouldnt reject a good religous guy.
                is your dunya education more important that angering Allah by taking out riba loans?

                and is the fact 'everybody else' is doing it ever an excuse for us to do a haram act as well?
                Daw'ud... is retired from ummah forum

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Rejecting a Potential Because of Their Student Loans

                  Originally posted by dawud_uk View Post
                  is your dunya education more important that angering Allah by taking out riba loans?

                  and is the fact 'everybody else' is doing it ever an excuse for us to do a haram act as well?
                  No, ofcourse not. But taking out loans from Islamic banks cant be incorrect? Or can it?
                  + Theyre interest free loans i think?

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Rejecting a Potential Because of Their Student Loans

                    Originally posted by BintelIisam View Post
                    No, ofcourse not. But taking out loans from Islamic banks cant be incorrect? Or can it?
                    + Theyre interest free loans i think?
                    You need to investigate before taking a step on this. The organization may not be interest free and calling it "islamic" or by other names doesn't necessarily make it halal.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Rejecting a Potential Because of Their Student Loans

                      Originally posted by BintelIisam View Post
                      No, ofcourse not. But taking out loans from Islamic banks cant be incorrect? Or can it?
                      + Theyre interest free loans i think?
                      as loonietoonie said, investigate, but i have never heard of such a riba free loan from any islamic bank.
                      Daw'ud... is retired from ummah forum

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Rejecting a Potential Because of Their Student Loans

                        Originally posted by dawud_uk View Post
                        is your dunya education more important that angering Allah by taking out riba loans?

                        and is the fact 'everybody else' is doing it ever an excuse for us to do a haram act as well?
                        Do you drive by any chance?

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Rejecting a Potential Because of Their Student Loans

                          Originally posted by Inquisitive10 View Post
                          Do you drive by any chance?
                          no, so cant hit me on the insurance one, though insurance is no where as near a major sin as riba.
                          Daw'ud... is retired from ummah forum

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: Rejecting a Potential Because of Their Student Loans

                            you not responsible for her debt so why should that put you off? :S this is something she has done before the marriage, is up to her to figure it out how she pays that debt.

                            i know one sister, when she was getting married as a dowry she asked her husband if he can pay off her student loan. he was working and had money and did not see this as a problem so he paid off her debt.

                            another one, she used her dowry money to pay off 1/2 her debt, and the other half her father paid it off.

                            i personally would go for the second choice. :up:

                            but is not something you have to do, Islamically is not your responsible.

                            but its your responsible for you to understand that, if she says shes going to work to pay off her debt, and to let her. otherwise you have to pay it for her.

                            i'm personally going to marry a brother who has huge debt because of student loan, it doesnt put me off one minute, and seen as i finished uni before him and got a job before he graduated, if he says help me out, i will.
                            “This day I have perfected your religion for you,completed My Favour upon you, and have chosen for you Islam as your religion.” [5:3]"I have created the jinns and the humans solely to worship Me."[51:56]"a woman's heart should be lost in God, that a man needs to see him in order to find her"

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: Rejecting a Potential Because of Their Student Loans

                              And this is the reason why i ain't gonna go uni (not until i save up) i'd rather work than be convinced to take on a riba-based loan from the student loan company .

                              Maybe you should ask why she/he has debts (is it coz of the riba-based loan)? Then unless they knew it or not you can ask? Wouldn't one someone who is happy on taking interest nor would you want someone who is happy or is easily persuaded/influenced in disobeying Allah.....
                              (The hypocrites) will call the believers: "Were we not with you?" The believers will reply: "Yes! But you led yourselves into temptations, you looked forward for our destruction; you doubted (in Faith); and you were deceived by false desires, till the Command of Allah came to pass. And the chief deceiver (Satan) deceived you in respect of Allah."57:14

                              Comment

                              Working...
                              X