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3 Marriage Qs So Simple Yet So Informative...READ ON..!! =]

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  • 3 Marriage Qs So Simple Yet So Informative...READ ON..!! =]

    Once there was a very handsome, pious, well educated young man, whose parents emphasised for him to get married. they had seen so many marriage proposals, and he had turned them all down. The parents thought it was becoming a little rediculous or suspected that he may have someone else in mind.



    however everytime the parents left the girls house, the young man would always say 'she's not the one!'



    the young man only wanted a girl who was religious and practicing. (which was hard to find). however one evening his mother arranged for him, to meet a girl, who was religious, and practicing.



    on that evening, the young man, and girl, were left to talk, and ask each other questions. (as one would expect).



    the young man, being a gentleman that he was allowed, the lady to ask first.



    the young girl asked the young man soooo many questions. she asked about his life, his education, his friends, his family, his habbits, his hobbies, his lifestyle, his enjoyment, his passtime, his experiences,.. lol. basically everything.



    and the young man replied to all of her questions, without tiring, and politely, with a smile the young girl took up nearly all of the time, over an hour, and felt bad, and asked the young man do you have any questions?



    the young man said,it's ok. i only have 3 questions...



    the young girl thought, wow, only 3 questions okay, shoot.



    The young man's first question was,

    1) Who do you love the most in the world, someone who's love nothing would ever overcome?



    she said, this is an easy question. my mother.

    he smiled



    second question, he asked

    2) you said that you read allot of qur'an, could you tell me which surahs you know the meaning of?

    hearing this she went red and embarrased and said,i do not know the meaning of any yet, but i am hoping to soon inshallah ive just been abit busy.



    the third question the young man asked, was

    3) i have been approached for my hand in marriage, by girls that are allot more prettier than you, why should i marry you?



    hearing this the young girl was outraged, she stormed off to her parents with fury, and said i do not want to marry this man he is insulting my beauty, and intelligence.



    and the young man and his parents, were once again, left without an agreement of marriage.



    this time, the young mans parents were really angry, and said what did you do to anger that girl, the family were so nice, and pleasant, and they were relgious like you wanted. what did you ask the girl?? tell us!



    the young man said, firstly i asked her,

    who do you love the most?
    she said, her mother,



    the parents said so, what is wrong with that??



    the young man said, 'no one, is muslim, untill he loves Allah, and his messenger(saw) more than anyone else in the world'



    If a woman loves Allah and the prophet(pbuh) more than anyone, she will love me and respect me, and stay faithfull to me, because of that love, and fear for Allah (swt). and we can share this love, because this love is greater than lust for beauty.



    The young man said, then i asked, you read allot of qur'an, can you tell me the meaning of any surah?




    and she said no. because i havent had time yet.

    so i thought of that hadith 'ALL humans, are dead except for those who have knowledge'



    she has lived 20 years and not found ANY time, to seek knowledge, why would i marry a woman, who does not know her rights, and responsibilities, and what will she teach my children, except how to be negligent, because the woman IS the madrasa (school) and the best of teachers.



    And a woman who has no time for Allah, will not have time for her husband.



    The third question i asked her was, that allot of girls, more prettier than her, had approached me for marriage, why should i choose you?



    that is why she stormed off, getting angry.



    The young man's parents said that is a horrible thing to say, why would you do such a thing, we are going back there to apologise.



    The young man said i said this on purpose, to test whether she could control her anger.



    The prophet(saw) said 'do not get angry, do not get angry, do not angry' when asked how to become pious. because anger is from Satan.



    if a woman cannot control her anger with a stranger she has just met, do you think she will be able to control it with her husband??





    so, the moral of this story is, a marriage is based on,

    knowledge, not looks,

    practice, not preaching,

    Forgiveness, not anger,

    spiritual love, not lust.

    and compromise



    One should look for a person who

    1) Has love for Allah (swt) and the messenger (saw)

    2) Has knowledge of the deen, and can act upon it.

    3) can control her anger

    and another important and crucial factor. that she be

    4) willing to compromise.



    and it goes both ways, so women seeking a man, should look for the same things.

    Ibn al-Qayyim: He (Allaah) created the seven seas, but He loved a tear from you (out of fear of Him) but your eyes were tearless.

  • #2
    Re: 3 Marriage Qs So Simple Yet So Informative...READ ON..!! =]

    The bit about calling her less pretty was a bit mean though...:( But I guess this story was trying to find a way of hihglighting the point of not getting angry too quickly mashAllah. :up:

    Ibn al-Qayyim: He (Allaah) created the seven seas, but He loved a tear from you (out of fear of Him) but your eyes were tearless.

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    • #3
      Re: 3 Marriage Qs So Simple Yet So Informative...READ ON..!! =]

      Originally posted by Bint Yusuf View Post
      The bit about calling her less pretty was a bit mean though...:( But I guess this story was trying to find a way of hihglighting the point of not getting angry too quickly mashAllah. :up:

      lool nice story.

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      • #4
        Re: 3 Marriage Qs So Simple Yet So Informative...READ ON..!! =]

        Originally posted by Asmara View Post
        lool nice story.
        :D

        Ibn al-Qayyim: He (Allaah) created the seven seas, but He loved a tear from you (out of fear of Him) but your eyes were tearless.

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: 3 Marriage Qs So Simple Yet So Informative...READ ON..!! =]

          This is a great reminder for me I feel like I was meant to read this especially after my last thread. Allah knows best. Were you reading my mind??? Just kidding.
          My Ummi-"You can't help who’s feelings get hurt by the TRUTH"
          ME @ 5 yrs old-Yeah, But You can sure try to put it in a way that will not make it hurt so bad...Right Nana? "
          My Ummi- Right Baby :inlove:.

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          • #6
            Re: 3 Marriage Qs So Simple Yet So Informative...READ ON..!! =]

            mmm..nice. I think i'll ask these 3 questions too. Foolproof stuff :D
            May we reach daruSalaam by His, and only His Decree
            I would die for the cause if I knew only to what degree
            *
            My Blog

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            • #7
              Re: 3 Marriage Qs So Simple Yet So Informative...READ ON..!! =]

              He was right to turn her down for not even knowing the meanings of any surahs- that is quite bad. The brother's reasons for asking such questions were sound but I wonder how he would respond if a sister treated him in like manner and asked him things like that? Would his response be better I wonder?
              The Lyme Disease pandemic: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5u73ME4sVU

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              • #8
                Re: 3 Marriage Qs So Simple Yet So Informative...READ ON..!! =]

                thats cool.

                i didnt think the last question was mean though. everyone knows theres always someone more prettier than u out there somewhere. to be upset about that is just dumb.
                Screaming, But Will Never Be Heard

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                • #9
                  Re: 3 Marriage Qs So Simple Yet So Informative...READ ON..!! =]

                  cool story. too bad there is not many guys around like that anymore......

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: 3 Marriage Qs So Simple Yet So Informative...READ ON..!! =]

                    Originally posted by GuCcI View Post
                    thats cool.

                    i didnt think the last question was mean though. everyone knows theres always someone more prettier than u out there somewhere. to be upset about that is just dumb.
                    Depends on the intention I suppose...;)

                    Zaina lol, qadr Allah.:up:

                    Ibn al-Qayyim: He (Allaah) created the seven seas, but He loved a tear from you (out of fear of Him) but your eyes were tearless.

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                    • #11
                      Re: 3 Marriage Qs So Simple Yet So Informative...READ ON..!! =]

                      Originally posted by Rosalie-Beauty View Post
                      cool story. too bad there is not many guys around like that anymore......
                      Too bad there aren't many girls around to answer the questions in the manner he expected
                      “Take Aqeedah from the Salaf, learn Adab from the Tableeghi Jamaat, and brotherhood from the Ikhwaan"

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                      • #12
                        Re: 3 Marriage Qs So Simple Yet So Informative...READ ON..!! =]

                        mashaAllaah, i think i have grown fond of this young man.


                        Assalamu Alaikum, jazakAllaah khair
                        You hope for salvation and you have not trodden its paths,
                        But the ship does not progress on dry land.

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                        • #13
                          Re: 3 Marriage Qs So Simple Yet So Informative...READ ON..!! =]

                          so, the moral of this story is, a marriage is based on,

                          knowledge, not looks,

                          practice, not preaching,

                          Forgiveness, not anger,

                          spiritual love, not lust.

                          and compromise

                          One should look for a person who

                          1) Has love for Allah (swt) and the messenger (saw)

                          2) Has knowledge of the deen, and can act upon it.

                          3) can control her anger

                          and another important and crucial factor. that she be

                          4) willing to compromise.

                          :jkk: for posting ukhti.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: 3 Marriage Qs So Simple Yet So Informative...READ ON..!! =]

                            mmm interesting post tho the last question is a bit risky - i wouldnt ask that if her dad was around :D

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                            • #15
                              Re: 3 Marriage Qs So Simple Yet So Informative...READ ON..!! =]

                              i dont like his questions:(

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