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  • #31
    Re: advise please

    i think u shud let it go... she wud hav told her parents wen u asked her to if she wanted to b with u, like muslimahonline sed that sayin... if u really want something u wud try 1000 ways to achieve it...

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    • #32
      Re: advise please

      Salams Brother,

      Forgive me if I say anything that hurts but i do speak with experience. My marriage of 20 years recently came to an end supposedly through Black Magic. My ex and I sought the help of so many "Holy men" who told us it was BM, the most useful thing was hearing that even if it is that, it doesnt control you totally. You arent like a puppet being managed by an external force. You still have a choice, it just places a seed. Dont let the Black Magic overtake you, it makes you feel as though you have no power to do anything.
      The best way to tackle it is by remaining steadfast in Allah SWTs commandments. Have faith, all power comes through the Creator. It may be family pressure that will sway her in the end.
      Be careful and weigh up the options, Love is a curious concept, and I know it hurts like mad. Even if it doesnt feel like it, if she isnt your destiny and your worse fears materialise, you wont always feel like this. After hardship always comes ease.

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      • #33
        Re: advise please

        Let me start by saying this, f***in pakis! Yes I am one of them too. So frickin pathatic are we, that I hear these stupid stories again and again. Dude, get out of there as some ppl here have suggusted. There is no black magic on her, and all those sheiks/crooks telling you that are BSing. Basically her grandpa died and ofcourse she was a emotional wrack and the stupid uncle asked her for her cousin, we pakis do these stupid things. She was pressured, blackmailed and didn't think straight and said yes. Now she is screwed coz she can't say no coz the dad gonna have a heart attack! Trust me I know how it works. She is not happy and she never will be.

        But there is nothing much you can do. She will prob marry him, to save her dad's life/face, and spend misrable couple of yr with the guy and then divorce.

        This is nothing new, and you are not alone, and don't ask "why me?", coz u won't get the answer, pick up youself, get up and walk away. Sounds harsh but thats the truth. Remember it is not ur move, it is her move and let her make it. I am ashamed at my culture, it is so pathatic and unislamic.
        Last edited by afrasayab; 28-07-07, 07:50 AM.
        Please pray for my health. Jazak Allah

        I found the enemy and it is me.

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        • #34
          Re: advise please

          Sorry no offense to anyone but i have been through enough hardship, although I am still waiting for my ease.
          Please pray for my health. Jazak Allah

          I found the enemy and it is me.

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          • #35
            Re: advise please

            As Salaamu Alaikum,
            Originally posted by afrasayab
            I am ashamed at my culture, it is so pathatic and unislamic.
            I agree with you brother, but in this world if you look closely you will find that most cultures are just like ours, it's just they have a different way of sugar coating it.

            Ma'aSalaama

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            • #36
              Re: advise please

              It never works if you love something or someone too much in this world. The only love is for Allah and He will give you the best!
              "There is a difference between knowing the path and walking the path." - Morpheus, The Matrix. :hidban:

              "It would not be reasonable in me if I did not serve Him Who created me, and to Whom ye shall (all) be brought back." Surah 36:22. Ya Sin (Yusuf Ali Translation)

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              • #37
                Re: advise please

                Asalaam Alaikum

                Akhi if this sister was meant to be your right now wife then Allah subhanawat'allah would have been giving you signs.
                What she is doing by leading you on then being nasty, telling you she is dreaming about you and your children in the park is all emotional blackmail.

                She is an engaged sister now. You MUST break all ties.
                The relationship you had with her origonally was haram....so don't be led any further down the path.

                Put things in a different sense....how would you feel if she was engaged to you and found out she was talking marriage and babies with another brother???

                Cut off all ties, change your mobile number, pray and you know what....there are thousands of single sisters out there who are looking for a good husband.

                Don't let shaytan play with you over this.....making you covet somthing you can't have.
                'Verily, never will Allah change the condition of a people until they change themselves.'
                (al-Ra'd, 13:11)

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                • #38
                  Re: advise please

                  Originally posted by afrasayab View Post
                  Let me start by saying this, f***in pakis! Yes I am one of them too. So frickin pathatic are we, that I hear these stupid stories again and again. Dude, get out of there as some ppl here have suggusted. There is no black magic on her, and all those sheiks/crooks telling you that are BSing. Basically her grandpa died and ofcourse she was a emotional wrack and the stupid uncle asked her for her cousin, we pakis do these stupid things. She was pressured, blackmailed and didn't think straight and said yes. Now she is screwed coz she can't say no coz the dad gonna have a heart attack! Trust me I know how it works. She is not happy and she never will be.

                  But there is nothing much you can do. She will prob marry him, to save her dad's life/face, and spend misrable couple of yr with the guy and then divorce.

                  This is nothing new, and you are not alone, and don't ask "why me?", coz u won't get the answer, pick up youself, get up and walk away. Sounds harsh but thats the truth. Remember it is not ur move, it is her move and let her make it. I am ashamed at my culture, it is so pathatic and unislamic.

                  Oh and there are sisters here too.....so you think your language is acceptable?
                  'Verily, never will Allah change the condition of a people until they change themselves.'
                  (al-Ra'd, 13:11)

                  Comment


                  • #39
                    Re: advise please

                    Originally posted by aisha2007 View Post
                    Oh and there are sisters here too.....so you think your language is acceptable?
                    Read my post not the language, and it is not like sisters don't hear this stuff. appologies if i have offended someone, but i have been through enough coz of my stupid culture.
                    Please pray for my health. Jazak Allah

                    I found the enemy and it is me.

                    Comment

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