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Of men, women and marriage

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  • Of men, women and marriage

    Couldn't think of a better title.

    Anyway, post away your random and not so random thoughts and opinions about any particular thread or post(er) you see in the marriage section here - this is where your off-topic posts go. Link back to the original thread and respond in this thread, tag the poster(s) if you must.

    Let us try to not derail others' threads. Feel free to post all your derailments here.

  • #2
    Joint family system is IMHO mega faulty and rarely do people, and by that I of course mean desi people, get it right.

    Comment


    • #3
      i just wanted to say

      Found some recent posts quite amusing

      The ones about women cant get along with other women and they cause the most issues

      Lmso

      Made me chuckle

      Not taking sides or saying it is true or not. You guys can figure that one out, leave me out of this

      Comment


      • #4
        This thread is not very wise. It can easily result in squables.

        Live your situations as you see fit and deal with the consequences as best you can. Let's be honest we are a bunch of nobodies on here and strangers want to ask and take marriage advice from us. It would be funny if it were not so tragic.

        Comment


        • #5
          ..

          Even if your being sarcastic like that you shouldnt talk like that with Hawwa radi allahu anhaa in the sentence.

          She deserves respect shes the wife of Adam alayhi salaam
          Last edited by .Hajar.; 31-05-21, 06:46 AM. Reason: quote removed

          Comment


          • #6
            ...

            Astaghfirullah - I would never say this.
            Last edited by .Hajar.; 31-05-21, 06:47 AM. Reason: quote removed
            "Europe died in Bosnia and was buried in Syria. Bodies of innocent children washing ashore are the
            western civilization's tombstones"


            Rajab Tayyab Erdogan

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by .Hajar. View Post
              Joint family system is IMHO mega faulty and rarely do people, and by that I of course mean desi people, get it right.
              If it's mega faulty why it's successful here, specially among the Pashtuns, who are probably the most religious people here?

              I gave you the ingredients of a successful joint family system:
              a) wise head
              b) strong men
              c) compassionate women

              see, we live in a different society, we have our own dynamics --- we need to have a close knitted big family, it also serves as a warning to bad people (like they would know that there are many male members in the house) -- sometimes when one of us is struggling financially, this family structure saves us from lots of headaches.
              "Europe died in Bosnia and was buried in Syria. Bodies of innocent children washing ashore are the
              western civilization's tombstones"


              Rajab Tayyab Erdogan

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by imran1976 View Post

                If it's mega faulty why it's successful here, specially among the Pashtuns, who are probably the most religious people here?

                I gave you the ingredients of a successful joint family system:
                a) wise head
                b) strong men
                c) compassionate women

                see, we live in a different society, we have our own dynamics --- we need to have a close knitted big family, it also serves as a warning to bad people (like they would know that there are many male members in the house) -- sometimes when one of us is struggling financially, this family structure saves us from lots of headaches.
                It's a good way to live, you have strong kinship and always family to lean on. Are Pashtuns keen on adoption lol.

                The alternative to this looks to be breaking ties, separation of grandparents from grandchildren. Great progress.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by nudgetheputri1 View Post


                  Are you married?
                  yes I am, 20+ years, Alhamdulillah.
                  "Europe died in Bosnia and was buried in Syria. Bodies of innocent children washing ashore are the
                  western civilization's tombstones"


                  Rajab Tayyab Erdogan

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by tevejat View Post

                    It's a good way to live, you have strong kinship and always family to lean on. Are Pashtuns keen on adoption lol.

                    The alternative to this looks to be breaking ties, separation of grandparents from grandchildren. Great progress.
                    It's not that all families here are joint family, the upper middle class is breaking away from joint system (rich class was always different) ---- it creates are very strong bond, you have to separate one day, but the strong relationships doesn't end ---

                    in my three ingredients, the wise head is grandfather -

                    Pashtuns are welcoming people, they respect their guests a lot .
                    "Europe died in Bosnia and was buried in Syria. Bodies of innocent children washing ashore are the
                    western civilization's tombstones"


                    Rajab Tayyab Erdogan

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by .Hajar. View Post
                      Couldn't think of a better title.

                      Anyway, post away your random and not so random thoughts and opinions about any particular thread or post(er) you see in the marriage section here - this is where your off-topic posts go. Link back to the original thread and respond in this thread, tag the poster(s) if you must.

                      Let us try to not derail others' threads. Feel free to post all your derailments here.
                      I will try to contribute in this thread.

                      but let's be clear here, this shouldn't turn into gender fight --- after reading my posts, some sisters probably think of me as a woman hater or having gender bias, that's not true --- I respect womenfolks a lot, to me, they are Queens & Princess - pointing out their mistakes will never be a gender bias on my part.
                      "Europe died in Bosnia and was buried in Syria. Bodies of innocent children washing ashore are the
                      western civilization's tombstones"


                      Rajab Tayyab Erdogan

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        The reason for high divorce rates

                        women have become feminists and men have become simps

                        gender roles have switched men have become like women and women have become like men

                        Solution- man should provide properly not be feminine take care of family be balanced in emotions and not be desperate and make the women his life

                        women should not challenge the man or think shes some independent women who doesnt need him coz she can get free house and benefits, be obedient dont challenege his authority, dont put your self on a pedestal, dont become career women and neglect family life until a later age

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by imran1976 View Post

                          I will try to contribute in this thread.

                          but let's be clear here, this shouldn't turn into gender fight --- after reading my posts, some sisters probably think of me as a woman hater or having gender bias, that's not true --- I respect womenfolks a lot, to me, they are Queens & Princess - pointing out their mistakes will never be a gender bias on my part.
                          How?

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by ten_toes View Post

                            How?
                            If you are married to a King won't that make you a Queen?

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by tevejat View Post

                              If you are married to a King won't that make you a Queen?
                              Who is a king? If women are Queens and princesses, are all women married to Kings?

                              Comment

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