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Unmarried mother as a result of rape. No parents want their Son to marry me

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  • #46
    Originally posted by RevertSana View Post

    This is such a common situation. It’s really not unusual sadly and it’s an issue many reverts face. Login to any revert group and you will see hundreds of the same issue. Just because a similar situation has been mentioned before doesn’t mean it’s the same person. I have only spoken to this man a few times so definitely wasn’t me in previous posts.
    I dont think it has something to do with Being a revert. Just dont pay attention to those who are harsh to you. There are many People on this forum who dont follow the teachings of the prophet pbuh and they will try their best to misguide you.

    Comment


    • #47
      Originally posted by Mintchocchip View Post

      Asalaam alaikum

      This person has posted before under several different names. Same scenario.

      I was not going to post but seeing as you are a new member you might not be aware that someone posts this same situation every so often with various user names.

      https://www.ummah.com/forum/forum/fa...riage-ceremony

      https://www.ummah.com/forum/forum/fa...rested-anymore

      https://www.ummah.com/forum/forum/fa...it-to-marriage
      Relax.

      Comment


      • #48
        Originally posted by muzzybee View Post

        There are plenty of brothers in UK who will accept you and marry you.
        You just need to find him.
        Do you have a wali.?
        What does he say
        ​​​​​
        I dont mind being the mediator between you two? Or anyone interested?

        If your interested in having another wife? zi-zizou Simply_Logical

        you both can ask questions about eachother via me and then decide if its workable or not?

        Poly brothers.
        Last edited by Flawed; 24-11-20, 01:57 PM.

        Comment


        • #49
          Originally posted by ABDEL-ATHEEM View Post
          وعليكم السلام ورحمة الله وبركاته يا أختي
          Your right but she is a revert muslima who has no male mahraam and her wali is not much of a help and she needs to complain to somebody about her problems, she needs to vent out her problems in order to get advice and help in shaa ALLAH. Yes she can have hayaa and talk about the vile sexual harassment she has faced.
          I regret participating on this thread, I really don't wish to further explain but you seem to be missing the point. Even the brothers who posted here used more conservative forms of the words she was saying. I was genuinely taken aback by it. Now it's my fault that I'm still here and I shouldn't have said anything after my first comment. So I'll not reply further on it.

          Comment


          • #50
            I’m not sure if this thread is genuine, but let’s assume it is.

            What happened to the man who raped you? Was it someone you know? Did you report him and did it get to trial? Have you had any counselling?

            Being raped is a very very traumatic experience. It has long lasting psychological, emotional & physical effects. It’s not easy for someone to enter a relationship with someone who is suffering in this way. It’s not about the fact that you have a child, but you may have to heal from your trauma. The fact that you are making excuses for the brother after the vile thing that he did shows that you need to work on your boundaries.

            You say you want to marry someone without a child but you are limiting yourself here. Your child is a victim too & it would take a very, very strong man to handle this situation in the correct way

            May Allah provide for you & grant you a loving spouse
            https://islamicgemsandpearls.wordpress.com

            Comment


            • #51
              Originally posted by TazkiyyatunNafs View Post

              I regret participating on this thread, I really don't wish to further explain but you seem to be missing the point. Even the brothers who posted here used more conservative forms of the words she was saying. I was genuinely taken aback by it. Now it's my fault that I'm still here and I shouldn't have said anything after my first comment. So I'll not reply further on it.
              You should not regret participating on this thread because your views are correct and your doing a good deed in shaa ALLAH but she is new to Islam and does not know any better. European non muslims in general tend to lack the shyness towards sexual matters that us muslims have when it comes to these matters.
              Last edited by ABDEL-ATHEEM; 24-11-20, 02:38 PM.
              ALLAH AL-ATHEEM created everything. Therefore ALLAH AL-ATHEEM created the earth and everything in the earth and created all of the heavens and everything in all of these heavens and created all of the hells and everything in all of these hells and created all of the universes and everything in all of these universes and created everything in between them.

              Comment


              • #52
                Originally posted by ABDEL-ATHEEM View Post

                You should not regret participating on this thread because your views are correct and your doing a good deed in shaa ALLAH but she is new to Islam and does not know any better. Europeans tend to lack the shyness towards sexual matters that us muslims have when comes to these matters.
                Being a Muslim for 6 years isn’t exactly a ‘New’ muslim akhi
                https://islamicgemsandpearls.wordpress.com

                Comment


                • #53
                  Originally posted by Layla_ View Post

                  Being a Muslim for 6 years isn’t exactly a ‘New’ muslim akhi
                  oh i did not know that sorry. i had thought she converted this year. I had misunderstood.
                  Last edited by ABDEL-ATHEEM; 24-11-20, 02:38 PM.
                  ALLAH AL-ATHEEM created everything. Therefore ALLAH AL-ATHEEM created the earth and everything in the earth and created all of the heavens and everything in all of these heavens and created all of the hells and everything in all of these hells and created all of the universes and everything in all of these universes and created everything in between them.

                  Comment


                  • #54
                    Originally posted by Flawed View Post

                    I dont mind being the mediator between you two? Or anyone interested?

                    If your interested in having another wife? zi-zizou Simply_Logical

                    you both can ask questions about eachother via me and then decide if its workable or not?

                    Poly brothers.
                    ermmm

                    Comment


                    • #55
                      Originally posted by Flawed View Post

                      I dont mind being the mediator between you two? Or anyone interested?

                      If your interested in having another wife? zi-zizou Simply_Logical

                      you both can ask questions about eachother via me and then decide if its workable or not?

                      Poly brothers.
                      Good point this forum is good place to find a partner.
                      But sister Layla
                      made some good points, about the situation and yeah op needs to take a back seat and think about her situation.her wali is not doing his job per se.....
                      She is rushing into this somehow with the wrong outlook.
                      Visit my channel - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCYk...dE4pHzSid7Lr0w

                      Comment


                      • #56
                        Originally posted by Layla_ View Post
                        I’m not sure if this thread is genuine, but let’s assume it is.

                        What happened to the man who raped you? Was it someone you know? Did you report him and did it get to trial? Have you had any counselling?

                        Being raped is a very very traumatic experience. It has long lasting psychological, emotional & physical effects. It’s not easy for someone to enter a relationship with someone who is suffering in this way. It’s not about the fact that you have a child, but you may have to heal from your trauma. The fact that you are making excuses for the brother after the vile thing that he did shows that you need to work on your boundaries.

                        You say you want to marry someone without a child but you are limiting yourself here. Your child is a victim too & it would take a very, very strong man to handle this situation in the correct way

                        May Allah provide for you & grant you a loving spouse
                        thats what i was thinking but im not assuming its genuine, seems like a troll tbh

                        Comment


                        • #57
                          Originally posted by Flawed View Post

                          Relax.
                          Not sure why my post is bothering you.

                          You and your ilk can continue posting and giving the "sister" much needed "sincere advice".

                          Comment


                          • #58
                            Originally posted by Flawed View Post

                            I dont mind being the mediator between you two? Or anyone interested?

                            If your interested in having another wife? zi-zizou Simply_Logical

                            you both can ask questions about eachother via me and then decide if its workable or not?

                            Poly brothers.
                            You what mate?!?

                            Comment


                            • #59
                              Originally posted by zi-zizou View Post

                              You what mate?!?
                              Nvm. Apparently op isn't a genuine post. So forget about it.

                              Comment


                              • #60
                                Originally posted by Mintchocchip View Post

                                Asalaam alaikum

                                This person has posted before under several different names. Same scenario.

                                I was not going to post but seeing as you are a new member you might not be aware that someone posts this same situation every so often with various user names.

                                https://www.ummah.com/forum/forum/fa...riage-ceremony

                                https://www.ummah.com/forum/forum/fa...rested-anymore

                                https://www.ummah.com/forum/forum/fa...it-to-marriage
                                Thanks...I thought I was having deja vu.

                                Comment

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