I have a child as a result of being raped. I knew that having a child would make it more difficult for me to meet someone as it is a dealbreaker for some people but never expected it to be this difficult.
However the issue I am facing is not with men but their parents. On several occasions a man has wanted to proceed with marriage and been fully accepting of the fact I have a child but once he has discussed with my parents that I have a child they immediately say they don’t think he should marry me. My Son is 7.
They know my child is the result of rape and I’ve had no consensual sexual contact but it makes no difference.
I am a revert but I’ve always been religious and never consented to any sexual acts outside of marriage.
At first I accepted these rejections but now it has started to break my heart. I am 31 and feel I will never get married.
In my culture parental opinion isn’t even sought before marriage so this is so strange for me.
I was hoping to meet someone conservative but it seems the conservative men are the ones more likely to be very strict about following in their parents wishes and since the men themselves seem to accept that I’m a parent I’d have more luck proceeding to marriage with someone who is willing to marry someone their parents wouldn’t choose themselves.
I find it so sad that someone can accept me and my child but then reject marriage because their parents don’t want them to marry someone with a child. i wonder sometimes if they don’t believe I was raped and think I have committed haram acts.
I am of course praying for marriage. I especially want to get married so that my Son can have a male Muslim in his life.
I don’t know what to do now as this situation has played out so many times. I don’t want to marry someone who has a child as my Son would struggle with that for reasons I won’t go into.
Can anyone advise me On what to do to combat this issue of parental disapproval I am facing so that I can find a good husband?
However the issue I am facing is not with men but their parents. On several occasions a man has wanted to proceed with marriage and been fully accepting of the fact I have a child but once he has discussed with my parents that I have a child they immediately say they don’t think he should marry me. My Son is 7.
They know my child is the result of rape and I’ve had no consensual sexual contact but it makes no difference.
I am a revert but I’ve always been religious and never consented to any sexual acts outside of marriage.
At first I accepted these rejections but now it has started to break my heart. I am 31 and feel I will never get married.
In my culture parental opinion isn’t even sought before marriage so this is so strange for me.
I was hoping to meet someone conservative but it seems the conservative men are the ones more likely to be very strict about following in their parents wishes and since the men themselves seem to accept that I’m a parent I’d have more luck proceeding to marriage with someone who is willing to marry someone their parents wouldn’t choose themselves.
I find it so sad that someone can accept me and my child but then reject marriage because their parents don’t want them to marry someone with a child. i wonder sometimes if they don’t believe I was raped and think I have committed haram acts.
I am of course praying for marriage. I especially want to get married so that my Son can have a male Muslim in his life.
I don’t know what to do now as this situation has played out so many times. I don’t want to marry someone who has a child as my Son would struggle with that for reasons I won’t go into.
Can anyone advise me On what to do to combat this issue of parental disapproval I am facing so that I can find a good husband?
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