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  • Question? Different Nationality Marriages - Pakistani/Bangladeshi

    A close Pakistani friend wants to get married to a girl from Bangladesh. They are both in their 30s and have involved their parents.

    The Bangladeshi parents are more or less ok with it but the Pakistani parents are totally against it.

    Their biggest objection is that she isn't Pakistani. That's it basically. She isn't Pakistani, she's Bangladeshi. How will we show our face in polite society.

    Any advice on how to get the Pakistani parents on board?

  • #2
    Perhaps the parents are thinking other things like
    -Are they going to stay in Pakistan?
    -Do they speak a common language? Which is it? Urdu Bengali or English? Communication is important! In my experience it's much more important for the girl. She needs to be involved in talking with neighbors and the family members!
    -Perhaps the people from that part of Pakistan just really hate Bangladeshi peoples. If that is the case then one should also consider that their kids are also going to be half Bangladeshi and they might get bullied in school.

    If they have these problems perhaps the parents need to be reassured that the couple will push through all those obstacles!

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by RED ICON View Post
      Perhaps the parents are thinking other things like
      -Are they going to stay in Pakistan?
      -Do they speak a common language? Which is it? Urdu Bengali or English? Communication is important! In my experience it's much more important for the girl. She needs to be involved in talking with neighbors and the family members!
      -Perhaps the people from that part of Pakistan just really hate Bangladeshi peoples. If that is the case then one should also consider that their kids are also going to be half Bangladeshi and they might get bullied in school.

      If they have these problems perhaps the parents need to be reassured that the couple will push through all those obstacles!
      Sorry I should have been clearer. Both families live in the UK but the guys side is from Pakistan and the girls side is from Bangladesh.

      The boys mother doesn't speak English but everyone else does. However they can all speak urdu so language shouldn't be an issue.

      The main objection is that she is Bangladeshi and that will bring shame ro his parents in the Pakistani community.

      The parents would be happy with a girl from Pakistan who is his cousin, speaks no English is 12 yrs or more younger than him and has nothing in common with him.

      They would love him to marry her but not this Bangladeshi girl who is a Uni grad with a good job and lots in common.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by sahib View Post

        Sorry I should have been clearer. Both families live in the UK but the guys side is from Pakistan and the girls side is from Bangladesh.

        The boys mother doesn't speak English but everyone else does. However they can all speak urdu so language shouldn't be an issue.

        The main objection is that she is Bangladeshi and that will bring shame ro his parents in the Pakistani community.

        The parents would be happy with a girl from Pakistan who is his cousin, speaks no English is 12 yrs or more younger than him and has nothing in common with him.

        They would love him to marry her but not this Bangladeshi girl who is a Uni grad with a good job and lots in common.
        Lol. He should marry someone who he feels compatible with and if it's the Bangladeshi girl then he should marry her. They're both desi at the end of the day so what's there to freak out about lol. :/

        If he doesnt make a move hell just end getting nowhere with his personal life, unfortunately. He should gather the courage to make a decision and act on it, end off. Hes not a child anymore.


        I know, easy saidnthan done lol.

        Comment


        • #5
          muzzybee bro did you tag me in this thread?

          i got a notification but when i click it, it says that im not authorised to view it, stranger huh

          Comment


          • #6
            Unfortunately this is quite common amongst Pakistani from an older generation.

            I know someone who was in the exact same situation. He left the family home and got married to her. Her family were like ok hes a pakistani. Thats bad but as bad as our sister/daughter leaving the house for him and living away.

            I hope this works for this young couple. Parents should sometimes let their children make their own decisions.

            The emotional blackmail that comes afterwards is unbearable sometimes.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Simply_Logical View Post
              muzzybee bro did you tag me in this thread?

              i got a notification but when i click it, it says that im not authorised to view it, stranger huh
              Yah think it got deleted.....

              Youtube channel - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCYk...dE4pHzSid7Lr0w

              **** Smiling won't cost you now is it ****

              Zawjati ,Uhibbuki mithla m ant Uhibbuki kaifam kunteeeWa mahm kna mahma sra

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by muzzybee View Post

                Yah think it got deleted.....
                What did you post? Lol

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Simply_Logical View Post

                  What did you post? Lol

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Simply_Logical View Post

                    What did you post? Lol
                    Bout racism...

                    Youtube channel - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCYk...dE4pHzSid7Lr0w

                    **** Smiling won't cost you now is it ****

                    Zawjati ,Uhibbuki mithla m ant Uhibbuki kaifam kunteeeWa mahm kna mahma sra

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      There's no need to bother trying to bring such parents on board. Such morons shouldn't be given any attention.

                      They should just get married and let the parents deal with it.
                      You think you know more than my scholar's qiyās? He was more learned than you and all other scholars combined. Yeah, the devil was the greatest scholar too and look where his qiyās of fire being better than tīn got him. Sorry.

                      You follow your scholar's qiyās, and I will follow the Qur'ān and Sunnah.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Linkdeutscher View Post
                        There's no need to bother trying to bring such parents on board. Such morons shouldn't be given any attention.

                        They should just get married and let the parents deal with it.
                        ikr, but how will they get married without a wali? Lol.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by muzzybee View Post

                          Bout racism...
                          Ohh okay 👍

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Flawed View Post

                            ikr, but how will they get married without a wali? Lol.
                            1. The requirement of a wali is disputed in the first place.
                            2. Such parents (the father specifically) do not qualify as 'walis' anyway. They have no right to wilayah. They have stripped themselves of it due to their sheer stupidity.
                            You think you know more than my scholar's qiyās? He was more learned than you and all other scholars combined. Yeah, the devil was the greatest scholar too and look where his qiyās of fire being better than tīn got him. Sorry.

                            You follow your scholar's qiyās, and I will follow the Qur'ān and Sunnah.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              If they're living with in laws it'll probably be disastrous. I've not heard happy things about these marriages but maybe others have.

                              Comment

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