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A wife making more money/higher education..is it an issue

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  • A wife making more money/higher education..is it an issue

    Are Muslim husband's intimidated by a wife who makes more money than them. Do they feel less of a man?

    I might be making more money than my husband one day because of my educational background. I don't want it to negatively impact my already challenging circumstances.

    So, for all the Muslim men do you care if your wife is more educated or makes more money than you? Why or why not. Be honest

    I have my personal thoughts on this based on experience, which I may share depending. But I would love to hear a Muslim man's view on this.

  • #2
    I don't think this should be an issue. But I get why some males may think like this as they would like to feel like the breadwinner and that's what makes them feel like they are fulfilling their roles? I'm talking about job BTW. They may feel inadequate if their wife is earning more than them.

    The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: “It will be said to the companion of the Qur’an: ‘Read, and ascend, and recite as you used to recite in the [previous] world, for your status will be according to the last verse that you recite.’” [At-Tirmidhi (2914) and Abu Dawood (1464)]

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    • #3
      Originally posted by LaylaAb View Post
      Are Muslim husband's intimidated by a wife who makes more money than them. Do they feel less of a man?

      I might be making more money than my husband one day because of my educational background. I don't want it to negatively impact my already challenging circumstances.

      So, for all the Muslim men do you care if your wife is more educated or makes more money than you? Why or why not. Be honest

      I have my personal thoughts on this based on experience, which I may share depending. But I would love to hear a Muslim man's view on this.
      I would have no issue with having a wife who earned more money than I did as long as it was halal and she took all the Islamic precautions that are prescribed for women when dealing with men and did not interfere with her religious obligations. After all, Prophet Muhammad's first wife Khadeejah(radiallahu anha) brought in the money when they were married. Honestly, I am probably one of the few who wouldn't mind being the stay at home dad, but that's because I love children- my brain goes into toddler mode any time I am near them.

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      • #4
        It’s a problem for insecure men who will then act super controlling in ways which goes against Islam due to their inability to handle that their wife may be earning more
        https://islamicgemsandpearls.wordpress.com

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        • #5
          Sadly, I've seen this too often.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by LaylaAb View Post
            Are Muslim husband's intimidated by a wife who makes more money than them. Do they feel less of a man?

            I might be making more money than my husband one day because of my educational background. I don't want it to negatively impact my already challenging circumstances.

            So, for all the Muslim men do you care if your wife is more educated or makes more money than you? Why or why not. Be honest

            I have my personal thoughts on this based on experience, which I may share depending. But I would love to hear a Muslim man's view on this.
            Maybe a decade or three ago it would have be something strange, but now women in education and work is a very common sight. At the end of the day you are still a woman and he is still a man.

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            • #7
              Depends. If they rely on her money to cover expenses then it will probably undermine his status as head of the household. If his earnings are sufficient to cover all their expenses then no I don't think it would be a major issue.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by Layla_ View Post
                It’s a problem for insecure men who will then act super controlling in ways which goes against Islam due to their inability to handle that their wife may be earning more
                I think some men like you say Insecure men would hate it with passion and it would really get to their ego

                Personality wouldn't bother me

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                • #9
                  Higher education than me isn't a problem. That's just a piece of paper.

                  Making more money than me is a big problem though. I find it really off putting.

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
                    Higher education than me isn't a problem. That's just a piece of paper.

                    Making more money than me is a big problem though. I find it really off putting.
                    That's weird..what's the problem with her making more money than you?

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Umm Uthmaan View Post

                      That's weird..what's the problem with her making more money than you?
                      She may not respect me as a husband and provider. In fact, she doesn't really need me at all.

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
                        Higher education than me isn't a problem. That's just a piece of paper.

                        Making more money than me is a big problem though. I find it really off putting.
                        The piece of paper is an indication of a certain level of knowledge attained. A highly skilled surgeon will have a piece of paper but it's his/her knowledge and skill that came with the paper that everyone will appreciate.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post

                          She may not respect me as a husband and provider. In fact, she doesn't really need me at all.
                          Not all women think like that.

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Umm Uthmaan View Post

                            Not all women think like that.
                            Maybe. But why take the risk?

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post

                              Maybe. But why take the risk?
                              Question is, would u want to be with someone who only respects you if you make more money than her? That's so lame.

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