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Can someone please tell me who pays for the Baraat dress of the bride?

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  • Can someone please tell me who pays for the Baraat dress of the bride?

    Salaam all,

    So the groom’s side are saying that the bride’s side pay for the baraat dress and the groom’s side will pay for his sherwani which he will wear on the baraat day. They are saying that they will pay for my walima dress which will be from their side. However my parents are saying that as per tradition the groom’s side have to pay for the bride’s baraat dress and jewellery and that is how it happened when my parents got married back in the 1980’s....

    Im scared this might cause conflict between the families even before the wedding has happened. Can someone shed some light on this tradition ... who traditionally pays for the baraat dress of the bride?

    By the way both families are Pakistani and the wedding will be in Pakistan so wanted to know the tradition there because I have been born and brought up in the UK so I have no idea.

  • #2
    If it's tradition, then there's no right or wrong, in regards to who does what.

    However, from personal experience - bride's parents pay for her dress on the first day, along with gold etc.

    And the groom's side pay for everything (the gold they are going to give her and her dress) for the second day.

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    • #3
      This is the type of stuff that ruin a whole marriage, cultural issues...

      its of no significance to the deen, just pay for the dress yourself so you dont cause your mum in law to hate you for the rest of your life or your fiance even calling the wedding off etc
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      • #4
        The fiqh of Pakistani marriage.

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        • #5
          There is no rule saying who has to pay for what but it is something families normally discuss beforehand and come to an agreement.

          I remember back in the days the boys side did pay for both the nikah dress and walima dress. Both the girls parents and her in laws would give the girl clothes as part of the wedding gifts. Some of the clothes would be stiched and some unstiched but would include quite a few very "fancy" clothes. The girl and her family and in laws would see the clothes that were going to be gifted to the girl way before the wedding and they would decide which one she would wear on the walima. Actually it was not really a big deal.

          Then changes happened lol, and girls wanted to choose their own wedding outfits for both nikah and walima, whereas before they were not really fussed.

          Also with the gold they used to decide what the parents will give and what the inlaws will give so she has the gold bangles, a tikkah, the nose ring and a gold set comprising of necklace, ring and earings. Anything else was extra so if the parents wanted to give an extra gold set they would so would the inlaws.

          Some traditions have changes a lot since the 80s. I guess your family should see what the tradition is now in the area where your inlaws live and where your parents are from. If the traditions clash then I hope you all come to some sort of agreement.

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          • #6
            indians also do this too

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            • #7
              Not Pakistani but from what I heard from friends, your finances family is correct. The tradition has changed since 1980s & groom doesn't have to pay for everything. They are trying to make your life easier, accept it. If your parents feel bad, then they can give the bride an extra outfit or pay extra money for her pre-wedding shopping as gift. Traditionally the wedding is brides party, hosted as the way they want it to be hosted including the clothe she wears & the food her family feeds. The walima is the grooms event hosted the way he wants to host it including the outfit he wears & food he feeds.

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