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  • #91
    Originally posted by Janna90 View Post

    Your so silly, I was just listing things not necessarily in any set order.
    The most important always comes first.

    Comment


    • #92
      Originally posted by Small fluff View Post

      I’m going to stop you right HERE, because you’re actually just making it worse! Despite how you put it! It makes you look like you have put all the older sister in the Ummah in a trash can.

      So thank you very much in advance for that.

      I hope you feel superior and better about yourself by putting your sisters down in the ground.

      You know some of us sisters are business owners, highly educated and it’s fun really to be put down by people like you just because of our age. I didn’t know making babies was more important then building a loving relationship with your partner. I guess sisters who can’t bare children can shoot themselves because According to you no one will take them. (Cannot Bare children ouhh she’s outdated...expired)

      I’m just glad that God is in control of this world and not humans who believe they have surpassed the creators knowledge of the unknown. Who believe science is fault free and error proof that we can put everyone in the same outcome or conclusion according to scientific probabilities. (The same science that has a hard time telling the truth about alcohol and how bad it is for you.

      Science is science but it’s not what Allah has ordained to be final. Outcomes always change )

      Ex.: Science says we all die in an average of 60! We all die when God has decided so! Some early some late.

      Science says woman lose stamina as they age but that same science also mention that women’s stamina increases with age while her male counterparts cannot keep up!

      In conclusion, don’t try to discourage, break hope, and scrutanize sisters who are still not married. We all wish to have a sound companion one day. But not for the societal norms and trends that keep changing with years!

      It’s like media will make older women more appealing one day and watch how everyone included Muslim will follow that trend! Because you know, now it’s a trend so we’ll accept it!

      ps: In this century men’s are not ready for polygamy! It requires serious responsibility and is not a joke like some have taken it for! For Polygamy to work you need to first start with the divorced sisters who have children!
      It's perhaps not easy to read but try not to take things too personally.

      If in your search your requirements are reasonable and what you offer is likewise and you are taking reasonable steps in finding someone then you have all your bases covered.

      Sisters in there 30s get married. It's all good.

      Comment


      • #93
        Originally posted by savo234 View Post

        Have you read my post correctly ? Nowhere does it says that women hit menopause at 30. However if the man and woman are the same age then in late 40s or early 50s, a healthy man would like to be sexually active for some years while the partner hits menopause(ONE AVERAGE)

        Why cant you stop citing anecdotal evidences and exceptions to prove a rule ? Just why ? Its a well-known searchable fact and there is plenty of medical evidence/journals on this issue, even a simple google search says this.

        "Fertility peaks in most women in the 20s. A gradual but significant decline begins around age 32. Yes, your odds of conception at 33 are not as good as they were at 28. At around age 37, fertility starts to decline at a much more rapid pace.

        Research has found that in any given month your chances of getting pregnant at age 30 are about 20 percent. Compare that to your odds at age 40, which are just 5 percent. Don't confuse this with your odds of getting pregnant overall. This is a per month statistic, not per year.
        "

        Why cant women just understand a simple fact that ideally women and men both should be getting married earlier but more so for women due to fertility and Islam explicitly encourages more children. Infact late marriages are a big cause of declining growth rate among muslims which is not good at all.
        Fertility decreases on average by 25% AFTER THE AGE OF 35 EINSTEIN

        Comment


        • #94
          Originally posted by zi-zizou View Post

          It's perhaps not easy to read but try not to take things too personally.
          Lololol

          why do I hear a patronising echo in your tone brother lol


          Comment


          • #95
            Originally posted by savo234 View Post



            No thats your assumption. Shariah is for all times and the wisdom/benefit in its rulings are there always. I know people who made polygamy work in desi societies where its looked down upon. So it just needs will and nothing else. I am strongly against any stigma against widowed or divorced women when desiring marriage, so you are just using a straw man here.



            You just did an emotional rant. I made a rational argument that hadith of Rasulullah(sa) asks us to prefer fertile women and fertility is highly correlated with age. Now ofcourse fertility is'nt the only factor, it is'nt even the biggest factor. Biggest factor is deen and then we have other factors like wealth, lineage beauty, character. However to totally reject fertility as a desirable trait and its correlation with age is like arguing against the hadith of our beloved Prophet(sa).

            I married at the age of 27 and I never told myself that "I am marrying at a perfect age". I believed that I should have been married earlier and early marriage is preferred in Islam. People need to separate their personal circumstances from the ideals. I repeat the ideal is not for women to stay unmarried until 30s just like its not ideal for men to stay unmarried until 30s. We do not change Islam based on our emotions and preference.

            If you happen to be unmarried at 30s, its your circumstances but dont try to normalize it, dont try to encourage it for your next generation.
            There were 30+ unmarried women in the time of the Prophet pbuh and there will be going forward. There are barron 20 year olds. This is life! Its a matter of circumstance, choices and preferences. Let Qadr take the wheel of fate.

            Comment


            • #96
              Guys just look at Prince Harry (age 34). Im surr he had an assortment of women to choose from. Whom did the handsome prince choose as his bride...a 37 year old Meghan Markle. 3 years his senior! This goes to show the difference between progressive & civilised thinking vs a backwards, closed minded way of thinking. Again, preferences people!

              Comment


              • #97
                Originally posted by Khamsa_khmis View Post

                There were 30+ unmarried women in the time of the Prophet pbuh and there will be going forward. There are barron 20 year olds. This is life! Its a matter of circumstance, choices and preferences. Let Qadr take the wheel of fate.
                Again the fallacy of making unverified claims and citing exceptions. Are you seriously trying to argue that average age of marriage was the same in Prophet's time as today ?

                There are barron 20 year olds and fertile 30 year olds but thats not the average. When will you stop using this fallacy.

                I am talking about scientific stats not "there can be this, there can be that".

                Comment


                • #98
                  Originally posted by Khamsa_khmis View Post
                  Guys just look at Prince Harry (age 34). Im surr he had an assortment of women to choose from. Whom did the handsome prince choose as his bride...a 37 year old Meghan Markle. 3 years his senior! This goes to show the difference between progressive & civilised thinking vs a backwards, closed minded way of thinking. Again, preferences people!
                  So kuffar are now progressive and us muslims are *backwards* simply because we think its good to marry early ?

                  Do hell with this prince and his wife, both of them married very late and probably had loads of zina before marriage.

                  They are in no way an example for Muslims !!!!

                  If a muslim marries late, how the hell is he/she supposed to suppress his/her sexual desires ? Again dont cite me exceptions "there can be, there is ".. The fact of the matter is on average its extremely difficult to suppress sexual desires for a decade or two and its also a fact that having many babies after 30 for women is'nt probable.

                  ​​​​​​

                  Comment


                  • #99
                    Originally posted by Khamsa_khmis View Post
                    Guys just look at Prince Harry (age 34). Im surr he had an assortment of women to choose from. Whom did the handsome prince choose as his bride...a 37 year old Meghan Markle. 3 years his senior! This goes to show the difference between progressive & civilised thinking vs a backwards, closed minded way of thinking. Again, preferences people!
                    Sad day when muslims look up to fornicating kuffar.

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by Khamsa_khmis View Post

                      There were 30+ unmarried women in the time of the Prophet pbuh and there will be going forward. There are barron 20 year olds. This is life! Its a matter of circumstance, choices and preferences. Let Qadr take the wheel of fate.
                      There was also polygamy at that time.

                      Comment


                      • Originally posted by Khamsa_khmis View Post
                        Guys just look at Prince Harry (age 34). Im surr he had an assortment of women to choose from. Whom did the handsome prince choose as his bride...a 37 year old Meghan Markle. 3 years his senior! This goes to show the difference between progressive & civilised thinking vs a backwards, closed minded way of thinking. Again, preferences people!
                        Calling a non-believer progressive and civilized and your fellow Muslims "backwards" and close minded is a sign of hypocrisy.

                        Comment


                        • Originally posted by Khamsa_khmis View Post

                          Lololol

                          why do I hear a patronising echo in your tone brother lol

                          No idea, maybe you are misreading/unable to read my intentions.

                          Comment


                          • I'm really curious to know, what are the circumstances of sisters who are in their late 20s or early 30s and still unmarried?

                            Have they simply not been able to find anyone all these years?

                            Or perhaps they had lots of good potentials in their early 20s whom they rejected and they are now paying the price?

                            Or perhaps they wanted to focus on education and career?

                            Do enlighten me.

                            But know this, delaying marriage intentionally and marrying late is from the way of the kuffar.

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by A.Basheer View Post

                              Calling a non-believer progressive and civilized and your fellow Muslims "backwards" and close minded is a sign of hypocrisy.
                              Au contraire, my fellow Muslims telling me my chances at finding a single man to marry are slim due to being divorced and 30 is not the emphasis of marriage in Islam.

                              Comment


                              • Originally posted by Khamsa_khmis View Post

                                Au contraire, my fellow Muslims telling me my chances at finding a single man to marry are slim due to being divorced and 30 is not the emphasis of marriage in Islam.
                                I see what is going on here.

                                Try not to take their posts personal. It is natural for men to go younger, but (many) women don't understand that as they tend to go older.

                                Everyone has trials and hardships. Some are married at 30 and wish they were single. Others are single at 30 and wish they were married. Just shows that this life is not worth it.

                                Comment

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