Ads by Muslim Ad Network

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Marriage to person of different race or ethnicity

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Marriage to person of different race or ethnicity

    I just got thinking. Is marrying exclusively to your own culture good - not for so called 'preference' - but because if marriage breaks down your family, parents and wali can arbitrate easier, not just in language barriers...

    But like people can say that marriage should be on the premise of the extent of religious practice. But some people can be religious but entrenched into their own customs.

    This can mean miscommunication and an unfair imbalance in spousal relations.

    My relative may be marrying soon and the family is saying, the potential has to be from our clan back home so we can deal with them through mutual respect from extended tribe networks.

    Don't support tribalism, but that seems to be the reality on the ground.

    What does Islam say about this thinking. I mean its not haram to marry from your country but you can't do that from racist thinking.


    Lol feel like this has been only my 3rd marriage thread since joining UF in 2009
    وَاقْصِدْ فِي مَشْيِكَ وَاغْضُضْ مِن صَوْتِكَ ۚ إِنَّ أَنكَرَ الْأَصْوَاتِ لَصَوْتُ الْحَمِيرِ - 31:19

    And be moderate in your pace and lower your voice; indeed, the most disagreeable of sounds is the voice of donkeys."


    أَلَمْ تَرَوْا أَنَّ اللَّهَ سَخَّرَ لَكُم مَّا فِي السَّمَاوَاتِ وَمَا فِي الْأَرْضِ وَأَسْبَغَ عَلَيْكُمْ نِعَمَهُ ظَاهِرَةً وَبَاطِنَةً ۗ وَمِنَ النَّاسِ مَن يُجَادِلُ فِي اللَّهِ بِغَيْرِ عِلْمٍ وَلَا هُدًى وَلَا كِتَابٍ مُّنِيرٍ - 31:20

    Do you not see that Allah has made subject to you whatever is in the heavens and whatever is in the earth and amply bestowed upon you His favors, [both] apparent and unapparent? But of the people is he who disputes about Allah without knowledge or guidance or an enlightening Book [from Him].


    Please take a look at my travel booking website : https://destinationfindertravel.com/

    Please take a look at my blog : http://thinkingmuslima.blogspot.co.uk/

  • #2
    Itís not good or bad, it depends on each persons preference. Well if marriage breaks down then we turn to Islamic teachings to solve the issues. Sure maybe you will have the culture in common so it might be easier, but not all families practice Islam the same. So even if itís the same culture, they might not be practising Islam as much and they do things according to their culture and customs which sometimes contradict Islam. So either way it doesnít really matter if you do or donít, itís not a guarantee for anything.

    In relation to the same tribe, then maybe itís taking it too far. If thatís your relatives personal choice then fair enough. But if their family is forcing that opinion on them then itís not right. I can sense that itís the family who wants that. Islamically they canít force anyone to marry against their will. So it depends on what your relative wants. They shouldnít get married just for the sake of pleasing the family.

    Comment


    • #3
      Nice to see an original topic here for a change.

      -_-

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by LailaTheMuslim View Post
        I just got thinking. Is marrying exclusively to your own culture good - not for so called 'preference' - but because if marriage breaks down your family, parents and wali can arbitrate easier, not just in language barriers...

        But like people can say that marriage should be on the premise of the extent of religious practice. But some people can be religious but entrenched into their own customs.

        This can mean miscommunication and an unfair imbalance in spousal relations.

        My relative may be marrying soon and the family is saying, the potential has to be from our clan back home so we can deal with them through mutual respect from extended tribe networks.

        Don't support tribalism, but that seems to be the reality on the ground.

        What does Islam say about this thinking. I mean its not haram to marry from your country but you can't do that from racist thinking.


        Lol feel like this has been only my 3rd marriage thread since joining UF in 2009
        Correct me if I'm wrong but didn't you take issue with me some time ago in a thread about me marry someone with "bronze skin tone" because that was my preference? So why would it be ok to marry someone of your own ethnicity exclusively because that is your preference? We all have different tastes and preferences. It is what it is. You have to like what you see every morning when you both get out of bed.
        "When a man sees the road as long he weakens in his walk." Ibn Qayyim

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Musbah View Post

          Correct me if I'm wrong but didn't you take issue with me some time ago in a thread about me marry someone with "bronze skin tone" because that was my preference? So why would it be ok to marry someone of your own ethnicity exclusively because that is your preference? We all have different tastes and preferences. It is what it is. You have to like what you see every morning when you both get out of bed.
          Was that me or someone else, I really can't remember making such a post. I mean, not to be offensive but why would that be wrong, interracial marriage is good with me.

          I am not talking about preference just the practicalities of marrying someone of your country for communication.

          I dunno maybe in the later stages when issues occur between spouses, it would be useful for this mutual understanding.
          وَاقْصِدْ فِي مَشْيِكَ وَاغْضُضْ مِن صَوْتِكَ ۚ إِنَّ أَنكَرَ الْأَصْوَاتِ لَصَوْتُ الْحَمِيرِ - 31:19

          And be moderate in your pace and lower your voice; indeed, the most disagreeable of sounds is the voice of donkeys."


          أَلَمْ تَرَوْا أَنَّ اللَّهَ سَخَّرَ لَكُم مَّا فِي السَّمَاوَاتِ وَمَا فِي الْأَرْضِ وَأَسْبَغَ عَلَيْكُمْ نِعَمَهُ ظَاهِرَةً وَبَاطِنَةً ۗ وَمِنَ النَّاسِ مَن يُجَادِلُ فِي اللَّهِ بِغَيْرِ عِلْمٍ وَلَا هُدًى وَلَا كِتَابٍ مُّنِيرٍ - 31:20

          Do you not see that Allah has made subject to you whatever is in the heavens and whatever is in the earth and amply bestowed upon you His favors, [both] apparent and unapparent? But of the people is he who disputes about Allah without knowledge or guidance or an enlightening Book [from Him].


          Please take a look at my travel booking website : https://destinationfindertravel.com/

          Please take a look at my blog : http://thinkingmuslima.blogspot.co.uk/

          Comment


          • #6



            i guess i understand the reasoning behind marrying your own culture i mean they know their own tribes as good people so theyre scared to get other people involved because they dont know a lot about those people?

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Kaas View Post


              i guess i understand the reasoning behind marrying your own culture i mean they know their own tribes as good people so theyre scared to get other people involved because they dont know a lot about those people?
              Yeah thats what I meant
              وَاقْصِدْ فِي مَشْيِكَ وَاغْضُضْ مِن صَوْتِكَ ۚ إِنَّ أَنكَرَ الْأَصْوَاتِ لَصَوْتُ الْحَمِيرِ - 31:19

              And be moderate in your pace and lower your voice; indeed, the most disagreeable of sounds is the voice of donkeys."


              أَلَمْ تَرَوْا أَنَّ اللَّهَ سَخَّرَ لَكُم مَّا فِي السَّمَاوَاتِ وَمَا فِي الْأَرْضِ وَأَسْبَغَ عَلَيْكُمْ نِعَمَهُ ظَاهِرَةً وَبَاطِنَةً ۗ وَمِنَ النَّاسِ مَن يُجَادِلُ فِي اللَّهِ بِغَيْرِ عِلْمٍ وَلَا هُدًى وَلَا كِتَابٍ مُّنِيرٍ - 31:20

              Do you not see that Allah has made subject to you whatever is in the heavens and whatever is in the earth and amply bestowed upon you His favors, [both] apparent and unapparent? But of the people is he who disputes about Allah without knowledge or guidance or an enlightening Book [from Him].


              Please take a look at my travel booking website : https://destinationfindertravel.com/

              Please take a look at my blog : http://thinkingmuslima.blogspot.co.uk/

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by LailaTheMuslim View Post

                Yeah thats what I meant
                Having a prefference is definately not haram, but declining a perfectly good person for a woman that you are mahram to, only on the bases that he is not the right etnicity i think is haram? Im not sure though

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Kaas View Post

                  Having a prefference is definately not haram, but declining a perfectly good person for a woman that you are mahram to, only on the bases that he is not the right etnicity i think is haram? Im not sure though
                  How do we know someone is perfectly good, marriage can be a risk itself because we as Muslims don't have long relationships beforehand. I see your point though, there is that hadith too.
                  وَاقْصِدْ فِي مَشْيِكَ وَاغْضُضْ مِن صَوْتِكَ ۚ إِنَّ أَنكَرَ الْأَصْوَاتِ لَصَوْتُ الْحَمِيرِ - 31:19

                  And be moderate in your pace and lower your voice; indeed, the most disagreeable of sounds is the voice of donkeys."


                  أَلَمْ تَرَوْا أَنَّ اللَّهَ سَخَّرَ لَكُم مَّا فِي السَّمَاوَاتِ وَمَا فِي الْأَرْضِ وَأَسْبَغَ عَلَيْكُمْ نِعَمَهُ ظَاهِرَةً وَبَاطِنَةً ۗ وَمِنَ النَّاسِ مَن يُجَادِلُ فِي اللَّهِ بِغَيْرِ عِلْمٍ وَلَا هُدًى وَلَا كِتَابٍ مُّنِيرٍ - 31:20

                  Do you not see that Allah has made subject to you whatever is in the heavens and whatever is in the earth and amply bestowed upon you His favors, [both] apparent and unapparent? But of the people is he who disputes about Allah without knowledge or guidance or an enlightening Book [from Him].


                  Please take a look at my travel booking website : https://destinationfindertravel.com/

                  Please take a look at my blog : http://thinkingmuslima.blogspot.co.uk/

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by LailaTheMuslim View Post

                    How do we know someone is perfectly good, marriage can be a risk itself because we as Muslims don't have long relationships beforehand. I see your point though, there is that hadith too.
                    Yeah yrue but how many times do muslims engage in relationships that turn out to be disasters after marriage anyway...

                    i think its best not to let your feelings get caught in the matter of marriage before marrying the person, that way you can analyse the person with a clear mind and not based on nafs. I got to do that with my husband and Alhamdulillah so far everything is going really well

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Kaas View Post

                      Yeah yrue but how many times do muslims engage in relationships that turn out to be disasters after marriage anyway...

                      i think its best not to let your feelings get caught in the matter of marriage before marrying the person, that way you can analyse the person with a clear mind and not based on nafs. I got to do that with my husband and Alhamdulillah so far everything is going really well
                      oh wow ur married sis, ma sha Allah didn't know thats good
                      وَاقْصِدْ فِي مَشْيِكَ وَاغْضُضْ مِن صَوْتِكَ ۚ إِنَّ أَنكَرَ الْأَصْوَاتِ لَصَوْتُ الْحَمِيرِ - 31:19

                      And be moderate in your pace and lower your voice; indeed, the most disagreeable of sounds is the voice of donkeys."


                      أَلَمْ تَرَوْا أَنَّ اللَّهَ سَخَّرَ لَكُم مَّا فِي السَّمَاوَاتِ وَمَا فِي الْأَرْضِ وَأَسْبَغَ عَلَيْكُمْ نِعَمَهُ ظَاهِرَةً وَبَاطِنَةً ۗ وَمِنَ النَّاسِ مَن يُجَادِلُ فِي اللَّهِ بِغَيْرِ عِلْمٍ وَلَا هُدًى وَلَا كِتَابٍ مُّنِيرٍ - 31:20

                      Do you not see that Allah has made subject to you whatever is in the heavens and whatever is in the earth and amply bestowed upon you His favors, [both] apparent and unapparent? But of the people is he who disputes about Allah without knowledge or guidance or an enlightening Book [from Him].


                      Please take a look at my travel booking website : https://destinationfindertravel.com/

                      Please take a look at my blog : http://thinkingmuslima.blogspot.co.uk/

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by LailaTheMuslim View Post

                        oh wow ur married sis, ma sha Allah didn't know thats good
                        I am Alhamdulillah moving in soon in sha Allah, and its interracial haha

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Kaas View Post

                          I am Alhamdulillah moving in soon in sha Allah, and its interracial haha
                          Ah ... makes sense now (all the weightloss threads) ;-)

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Kaas View Post

                            I am Alhamdulillah moving in soon in sha Allah, and its interracial haha
                            Alhamdulilah I ask Allah to bless it for you
                            وَاقْصِدْ فِي مَشْيِكَ وَاغْضُضْ مِن صَوْتِكَ ۚ إِنَّ أَنكَرَ الْأَصْوَاتِ لَصَوْتُ الْحَمِيرِ - 31:19

                            And be moderate in your pace and lower your voice; indeed, the most disagreeable of sounds is the voice of donkeys."


                            أَلَمْ تَرَوْا أَنَّ اللَّهَ سَخَّرَ لَكُم مَّا فِي السَّمَاوَاتِ وَمَا فِي الْأَرْضِ وَأَسْبَغَ عَلَيْكُمْ نِعَمَهُ ظَاهِرَةً وَبَاطِنَةً ۗ وَمِنَ النَّاسِ مَن يُجَادِلُ فِي اللَّهِ بِغَيْرِ عِلْمٍ وَلَا هُدًى وَلَا كِتَابٍ مُّنِيرٍ - 31:20

                            Do you not see that Allah has made subject to you whatever is in the heavens and whatever is in the earth and amply bestowed upon you His favors, [both] apparent and unapparent? But of the people is he who disputes about Allah without knowledge or guidance or an enlightening Book [from Him].


                            Please take a look at my travel booking website : https://destinationfindertravel.com/

                            Please take a look at my blog : http://thinkingmuslima.blogspot.co.uk/

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Indefinable View Post

                              Ah ... makes sense now (all the weightloss threads) ;-)
                              Looll i suppose its a motivator, and those 5 kgs dont wanna leave

                              Comment

                              Working...
                              X