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Parents won't let me marry me fiance- feeling depressed ( advice needed)

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  • Parents won't let me marry me fiance- feeling depressed ( advice needed)

    Last edited by Chocolatefudge24; 29-01-19, 10:43 PM.

  • #2
    Approach your local imam and ask him for help and support. You are definitely not doing anything wrong by marrying the person you want to marry. Get support from relatives and elders to whom your parents will listen to.

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    • #3
      Also, try to get closer to Allah, make istighfar, pray istikhara. When Allah helps you there is no one who can stand against you. This is obvious and I'm positive you would have done this but it never hurts to remind! Don't lose hope and ruin your mental health, then it will be easier for people to oppose you. Instead try to stay strong, brave and confident. Stand up strong and take what you want in life. If you're meek and soft people will walk over you without hesitation.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by IsaahM View Post
        Approach your local imam and ask him for help and support. You are definitely not doing anything wrong by marrying the person you want to marry. Get support from relatives and elders to whom your parents will listen to.

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        • #5
          may Allah make this easy on you! It's such a tough situation but persevere!! Stick to this if you know it's right and make duaa to Allah to make you strong enough for this test

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          • #6
            Your parents are holding your happiness hostage. That is selfish, inconsiderate, controlling and cruel. If this man is good and has taqwa then you to take control of your life and go to the local masjid and see if the imam can talk some sense into your parents.
            "When a man sees the road as long he weakens in his walk." Ibn Qayyim

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            • #7
              Listen to your parents.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by bamjamjamma View Post
                may Allah make this easy on you! It's such a tough situation but persevere!! Stick to this if you know it's right and make duaa to Allah to make you strong enough for this test

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Musbah View Post
                  Your parents are holding your happiness hostage. That is selfish, inconsiderate, controlling and cruel. If this man is good and has taqwa then you to take control of your life and go to the local masjid and see if the imam can talk some sense into your parents.

                  May allah soften their hearts. I do think that I need to do this inshallah. Alhamdullilah this person has encouraged me so much deen wise and yes, we all have flaws but I just truly see this person as an ideal Muslim husband. I just fear that I break my parents hearts but I just cannot continue to live this way

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Chocolatefudge24 View Post


                    May allah soften their hearts. I do think that I need to do this inshallah. Alhamdullilah this person has encouraged me so much deen wise and yes, we all have flaws but I just truly see this person as an ideal Muslim husband. I just fear that I break my parents hearts but I just cannot continue to live this way
                    You know you have a winner when that person brings out the best in you especially if that person helps you in your Deen to be a better Muslim. May Allah Azza wa Jal make things easy for you to reach your happiness. Ameen.
                    "When a man sees the road as long he weakens in his walk." Ibn Qayyim

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Indefinable View Post
                      Listen to your parents.

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                      • #12
                        Amazing how you're willing to argue with your whole family over a guy you met two minutes ago...he's not your fiance; if your wali doesn't agree with it then he is nothing to you.

                        Just back off for a while, let everyone cool down. The fact your siblings are also against this is very telling...

                        Do istikhara...


                        Women lost their modesty when men lost their gheerah..” .

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Musbah View Post

                          You know you have a winner when that person brings out the best in you especially if that person helps you in your Deen to be a better Muslim. May Allah Azza wa Jal make things easy for you to reach your happiness. Ameen.
                          JazakAllah khayr. I appreciate it! Ameeeeen

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by shay5 View Post
                            Amazing how you're willing to argue with your whole family over a guy you met two minutes ago...he's not your fiance; if your wali doesn't agree with it then he is nothing to you.

                            Just back off for a while, let everyone cool down. The fact your siblings are also against this is very telling...

                            Do istikhara...

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                            • #15
                              Pray istikhara sister. The dua in istikhara is very nice and it is really helpful for people in dilemmas. Allah will facilitate what is better for you.

                              By the way, like your parents said and like I said before, grow up and be strong and brave. Don't behave like a damsel in distress and work yourself into mental illnesses. Be strong and stand tall and show them that you are capable of making your own decisions and being independent. If you behave like a doormat then people will walk over you without doubt. Be stern and cold when you need to and don't be pushed over so easily. Pray tahjjudd every night. When we make dua we shouldn't ask Allah to magically change our surroundings, we should be making dua for Allah to change us so that we can deal with our problems.

                              In the Quran Allah says that He will not change the condition of people until they change the condition inside of themselves.

                              Maybe this is a test to see whether you are ready for marriage. Marriage and married life isn't a joke and it isn't easy. Look around on this forum and you will see the number of people who are having problems in their married life. Unless you can brave up and set yourself strong then you aren't ready for marriage? Maybe Allah SWT in his glory and wisdom is waiting for you to show change in yourself before he gives you what you ask for. Does this make sense? I hope you're getting the point...

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