So, I am an 18 year old revert and I met this girl online who is also 18. We're both American but she is ethnically Albanian and her parents come from Albania. Over time we both caught feelings for each other and so I told her I was interested in marriage with her. She was definitely interested however when she brought it up to her parents they were totally against it because I'm not Albanian. She tried to convince them to change their minds but no luck. She is very close to her family and doesn't want to hurt them so she stopped pushing the idea and the other day we pretty much decided that there's no chance with us. I've been pretty depressed about the whole thing and I'm not sure how to go forward. Is there anything that could be done at this point or should I just cut my losses? And any advice for getting over her would be appreciated. جزاك اللهُ خيرًا
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Originally posted by Yaqub Al Mahkam View PostSo, I am an 18 year old revert and I met this girl online who is also 18. We're both American but she is ethnically Albanian and her parents come from Albania. Over time we both caught feelings for each other and so I told her I was interested in marriage with her. She was definitely interested however when she brought it up to her parents they were totally against it because I'm not Albanian. She tried to convince them to change their minds but no luck. She is very close to her family and doesn't want to hurt them so she stopped pushing the idea and the other day we pretty much decided that there's no chance with us. I've been pretty depressed about the whole thing and I'm not sure how to go forward. Is there anything that could be done at this point or should I just cut my losses? And any advice for getting over her would be appreciated. جزاك اللهُ خيرًا
Thank Allah swt for you do not know what bigger problems you have been saved from had you married her.
Do plenty of dua for a rightous spouse.
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Originally posted by Yaqub Al Mahkam View PostSo, I am an 18 year old revert and I met this girl online who is also 18. We're both American but she is ethnically Albanian and her parents come from Albania. Over time we both caught feelings for each other and so I told her I was interested in marriage with her. She was definitely interested however when she brought it up to her parents they were totally against it because I'm not Albanian. She tried to convince them to change their minds but no luck. She is very close to her family and doesn't want to hurt them so she stopped pushing the idea and the other day we pretty much decided that there's no chance with us. I've been pretty depressed about the whole thing and I'm not sure how to go forward. Is there anything that could be done at this point or should I just cut my losses? And any advice for getting over her would be appreciated. جزاك اللهُ خيرًا
Akhi this isnt how you look for a wife, by chatting online and developing feelings for a woman.
Cut her off completely.
If your looking to get married, Do it the right way, if your Wali is non muslim and you ha e no Muslim uncles etc, then ask your local Imaam/Masajid to help you out.
جزاك الله خيراhttp://www.ilovepalestine.com/campai...imesinGaza.gif
"It does not befit the lion to answer the dogs."
Imam al-Shafii (Rahimahullah)
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assalaamu alaykum,
As others have said, there is nothing much you can do. If she was bothered by it a great deal, she could reach out to an imam or sheikh and ask for help, but that is her decision to make and not your's so as she's accepting her parents wishes time to move on.
This is a good lesson for you, not too much harm done other than emotionally so take your lumps and learn from it.
Don't get too close in the marriage process, until the nikkah is done. There are good reasons Allah put these processes and rulings in place, so don't go against them or others in our deen and not expect occasional or even serious problems from it.FOLLOW THE NEW BLOG - GINGERBEARDMAN - Muslim, father, husband, writer, defender of ginger rights!
www.facebook.com/outreach4Islam - Outreach4Islam have been working together in Leicester, calling the not yet Muslims to Islam since 2006.
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Originally posted by imran1976 View PostHow do people fell in love online ........FOLLOW THE NEW BLOG - GINGERBEARDMAN - Muslim, father, husband, writer, defender of ginger rights!
www.facebook.com/outreach4Islam - Outreach4Islam have been working together in Leicester, calling the not yet Muslims to Islam since 2006.
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Originally posted by Gingerbeardman View Post
People used to 'fall in love' with people they wrote letters to centuries ago, or the person they think they are based upon the best impression given through correspondence and the imagination and desires of the fallee.
today's online world is fake."Europe died in Bosnia and was buried in Syria. Bodies of innocent children washing ashore are the
western civilization's tombstones"
Rajab Tayyab Erdogan
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Originally posted by imran1976 View Post
Letters are totally different thing.--- I remember my father writing letters to me and vice versa, I don't have words to explain the beauty in those writings.
today's online world is fake.FOLLOW THE NEW BLOG - GINGERBEARDMAN - Muslim, father, husband, writer, defender of ginger rights!
www.facebook.com/outreach4Islam - Outreach4Islam have been working together in Leicester, calling the not yet Muslims to Islam since 2006.
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Originally posted by imran1976 View Post
Letters are totally different thing.--- I remember my father writing letters to me and vice versa, I don't have words to explain the beauty in those writings.
today's online world is fake.
Online feels fake when you do not know the person or have never met them for real so in a sense are a stranger. That can happen with letter writing too for example having penpals was quite common back in the days.
You just have to keep your guard when communicating with strangers. There are certain boundaries you do not cross.
I remember waiting a nearly a week for letters to arrive from Pakistan and same amount of time for a letter to get there. It was exciting waiting fot the letter to arrive and check everytime the post came.Last edited by Mintchocchip; 22-12-18, 07:38 PM.
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