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Traditional brother - salafi sister

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  • Traditional brother - salafi sister

    Assalamualaikum,

    First of all, bismillahirrahmanirrahim may Allah ta'ala protect this thread from oppressive closing.

    I'd like your kind advice guys. I'm currently evaluating a potential. She seems pious and attracts me physically, but there is one potential issue: she's a self proclaimed salafi. I think we'd be able to somehow make an agreement upfront regarding fiqh differences, and tbh I feel safe in the sense that a salafi will strictly adhere to the sharia. My fear is regarding aqidah differences (you know, where is Allah and all that). Do you think a traditional-salafi couple is doomed to fail or is there still a chance? Jazakumullahu khair.

    I'm on a strict time management regiment and have to limit my time online. Therefore I have to reply selectively. Please don't be offended if I ignore your questions. :jkk:

  • #2
    Not unless you two make it a big deal. Like if you two always bring up the issue than better not but if you two are on agreement you both have difference of opinions than I'm not sure why not. As long as no one is going to graves and bowing down than it perhaps could work.
    Don't depend too much on anyone in this world because even your own shadow leaves you when you are in the darkness

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    • #3
      Let her know that you are an Ash'ari and then she can make the right decision if Allah wishes her the best.
      The Prophet s.a.a.w warned when he said: "You will surely follow the ways of those who came before you, in exactly the same fashion, to the point were they to enter the hole of a lizard, you too would enter it." It was asked of him, "O Messenger of Allah s.a.a.w., do you mean the Jews and Christians?" He replied, "Who else?" (Bukhari and Muslim)

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      • #4
        Originally posted by Allah's_Servant View Post
        Not unless you two make it a big deal. Like if you two always bring up the issue than better not but if you two are on agreement you both have difference of opinions than I'm not sure why not. As long as no one is going to graves and bowing down than it perhaps could work.
        The problem is that I'm not sure an aqidah difference is something that a couple can just agree to disagree on. Except if she does tafwid then that's perfectly fine
        I'm on a strict time management regiment and have to limit my time online. Therefore I have to reply selectively. Please don't be offended if I ignore your questions. :jkk:

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        • #5
          Originally posted by budi.sudaryo View Post

          The problem is that I'm not sure an aqidah difference is something that a couple can just agree to disagree on. Except if she does tafwid then that's perfectly fine
          Are you student of knowledge or are you just a laymen? If you are a student of knowledge better for you to marry someone who believes the same things you do
          Don't depend too much on anyone in this world because even your own shadow leaves you when you are in the darkness

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          • #6
            shes gonna call u mubtadi once she learns about asharis

            dont marry her

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Abu julaybeeb View Post
              shes gonna call u mubtadi once she learns about asharis

              dont marry her
              Yeah, no, because she already approved my profile in which I state that I'm an ash'ari

              Originally posted by Allah's_Servant View Post

              Are you student of knowledge or are you just a laymen? If you are a student of knowledge better for you to marry someone who believes the same things you do
              I'm an avid seeker of knowledge
              I'm on a strict time management regiment and have to limit my time online. Therefore I have to reply selectively. Please don't be offended if I ignore your questions. :jkk:

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              • #8
                Originally posted by budi.sudaryo View Post

                Yeah, no, because she already approved my profile in which I state that I'm an ash'ari



                I'm an avid seeker of knowledge
                thats coz she doesnt know what ashari is probably

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by budi.sudaryo View Post
                  Assalamualaikum,

                  First of all, bismillahirrahmanirrahim may Allah ta'ala protect this thread from oppressive closing.

                  I'd like your kind advice guys. I'm currently evaluating a potential. She seems pious and attracts me physically, but there is one potential issue: she's a self proclaimed salafi. I think we'd be able to somehow make an agreement upfront regarding fiqh differences, and tbh I feel safe in the sense that a salafi will strictly adhere to the sharia. My fear is regarding aqidah differences (you know, where is Allah and all that). Do you think a traditional-salafi couple is doomed to fail or is there still a chance? Jazakumullahu khair.
                  Wa alaykumus salaam,

                  Depends on what you mean by traditionalist and salafi... if you mean you, yeah you'd be a total wrong match for any salafi, I'd seriously flat out refuse you a meeting if I was the wali given some of the stuff you've said here.

                  So why not let her know you're on here, and she can read your public comments past couple of years and see if she feels you'd both be a good match or not?
                  FOLLOW THE NEW BLOG - GINGERBEARDMAN - Muslim, father, husband, writer, defender of ginger rights!

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Gingerbeardman View Post

                    Wa alaykumus salaam,

                    Depends on what you mean by traditionalist and salafi... if you mean you, yeah you'd be a total wrong match for any salafi, I'd seriously flat out refuse you a meeting if I was the wali given some of the stuff you've said here.

                    So why not let her know you're on here, and she can read your public comments past couple of years and see if she feels you'd both be a good match or not?
                    No problem for me, my posts are all there for her to see if she wants. I don't have anything to hide.

                    By the way, is it a given that all salafis believe that God is in the sky or above us? Or some of them do tafwid instead?
                    I'm on a strict time management regiment and have to limit my time online. Therefore I have to reply selectively. Please don't be offended if I ignore your questions. :jkk:

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                    • #11
                      Might be of some interest.

                      https://www.ummah.com/forum/forum/is...oint-of-takfir

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by budi.sudaryo View Post

                        No problem for me, my posts are all there for her to see if she wants. I don't have anything to hide.

                        By the way, is it a given that all salafis believe that God is in the sky or above us? Or some of them do tafwid instead?
                        do u believe in wahdood al wajood

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Mintchocchip View Post
                          this barely says anything
                          its not a good thread explaining the detail behind the arguments

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                          • #14
                            First of all be honest with her and inform her about your aqidah. If she was my sister, I wouldn't let her marry you. Don't take it personally because I don't know you and I haven't seen what you've written in the forum prior to this thread. But let's say you two got married and you had kids. What are you going to teach those kids? You'll end up confusing them.
                            رَّبِّ ارْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِي صَغِيرًا

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                            • #15
                              Love how Sufis call themselves "traditional"

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