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Should you ever have to apologise for your mental health?

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  • Should you ever have to apologise for your mental health?

    A message to my friend:

    Fine if you don't want to talk to me, it doesn't really bother me anymore. I would just want to say one last thing.Thank you for effing me over. Thank you for teaching me who not to trust. Thank you for showing me how people turn into the person they'd said they'd never be. Thank you for showing me me people won't always care when they say they do. Thank you for breaking my heart. I'm emotionally screwed.

    I helped you soooo much in the first year of college. I literally gave you your distinctions and made you get you D*D* in you first year. I would literally stay awake until 4 am answering your questions on whats app. But i didn't care because I thought you were worth it, so I didn't care if i lost sleep.

    I would respond to your messages immediately whenever you asked a question in the first year, even though you didn't do the same for me. I was patient. I didn't want to start a fight so I ignored it. And this is what I get in return. A Complete liar. What did I do to deserve this. I'm sorry, but I am just very hurt right now. How could you?! I have no words. I can't even comprehend it.

    And then in the second year when our classes got separated, I fell into a downwards spiral, mentally draining black hole called depression. My grandma died, my family was on the brink of collapse, my anxiety got hold of me, it was all to much. I could not handle it. I was a living zombie. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat, I didn't feel anything. I was numb. I just wanted to hide away and not do anything at all. I didn't want to talk to anyone.

    Not even my own mum and my own sisters, so it wasn't just you. It was everyone. I hated life and I just wanted it to end. I stopped taking care of myself and I forgot how it felt to be happy and content and at peace and truly satisfied with life. I would ask myself everyday why i was still breathing. Why I didn't just cut myself and end it all. Why I didn't just run away from my family and start a new life. But I found my inner peace later on in life. I found god, and everything changed. And I am so incredibly grateful. Be kind to others, you never know what kind of a battle they are going through.

    And then you come along asking me questions about the work and by that Point I thought what is the point. I give up on life. Life is just not worth living anymore. I know you probably hate me for that and hence why you are airing me right now. You are trying to give me a taste of my own medicine. And I completely understand that. You didn't know.

    And I don't know why you are still holding grudges till today about it. Even though I explained my situation to you. If you cannot respect the the fact that I was facing a mental illness called depression, then i'm sorry but you are not worth my time. Mental health is not something little as you make it out to be. It is very serious. How could you not accept that, and understand that. It amazes me?! Its just goes to show what kind of a person you truly are.

    Your probably just going to silently move away from the situation and pretend that nothing has ever happened. Why should I lose myself trying to hold on to you when you don't give a damn and doesn't care about losing me. Why should I put the effort in in the first place, why should I even waste my precious time over a lost cause. Its hopeless.

    you have taught me that you can't control someones loyalty. No matter how good you are to them. It doesn't mean they will treat you the same. No matter how much they mean to you, it does not mean they will value you the same. Sometimes they people you genuinely care for the most turn out to be the people you can trust they least.

    No matter how hard I try to rekindle our friendship, you keep pushing me aside. And I can't break through. And I find it ridiculous that I am having to apologise for my mental health, for my depression. Number one: I shouldn't even have to be apologizing for my depression full stop. That is so stupid and crazy. No one ever does. How would you even know this?

    I don't think you have ever been through depression. If you did, you would understand me completely, you would become much more humble and would have given me my time and space to heal. You have no idea how much pain and hardship and sacrifices I've had to make last year so don't judge me. What if I were to do the same thing to you? How would you feel? demoralized.

    Don't you have some sort of mercy in your heart?! I mean come one, something should have clicked inside your head right away. And instead you are blanking me and your airing game is going strong. Well done to you, you must feel so proud of yourself. You won. I hope you are happy.

    We don't talk anymore like we use to do. I'm sad that our 'friendship' is over - but then again you were never really my friend from the start. You only pretended so that you can manipulate me and use and abuse me for your own selfish benefit.I thought I could trust you. I trusted you with all my heart. I thought you would never ever do this to me. But I was wrong. You did use and abuse me in the end even though you said you never would. What a big lie.

    I am still in shock, and it will take a long time time to actually believe it and to heal. And after all that is said and done, it looks like i'm going to be the broken one whilst you silently get on with your life. How unfair. Sometimes its just better to move on, instead of being the only one who is willing to fix things. I can't believe you. wow.You betrayed me.

    If there is one thing that I cannot stand and tolerate, it is disloyalty. You were not loyal to me, You were only loyal for the things you wanted from me. Once you got what you want, so did you loyalty. Then you vanished from the face of the earth. Now I can clearly see you true colours. You mask has finally dropped off and I can see what kind of person you are. And I never thought you would ever turn out like this. Never in a million years. Show me disloyalty and I'll show you detachment. Its hard. Its hard to find true genuine and loyal people these days.Thanks to you, I now have trust issues.

    Even though you have effed me over, I want you to know that I still care for despite whatever has happened between us. You don't have to reply to my message if you don't want to. I just wanted to clear the air and get some thing off my chest as it has been haunting me for days. I just wanted to vent to you and let you know exactly how you have made me feel. I feel let down, annoyed, angry, upset - an emotional breakdown. No-one has ever done this to me before. Its new to me.This experience has made me stronger and has made me grow as a person. So thank you.

    My doors are always open for you. Because I am not that kind of person. I would never ever break anyone's heart the way you did to me, because I know how it feels. I wouldn't wish it on my worst-est enemy. It is so sad that it had to end like this, But I hope that one day you will understand the pain you have put me through and that god changes your heart for the better, making you more humble, loving and compassionate towards others.

    But right now, I've got to go my own way and do what is best for me.

    And I hope you can respect that.

    Your dearest friend,


  • #2
    Why is this in the marriage section?

    When I saw the title I thought the post was going to be about should you have to apologise to your spouse regarding your mental health.

    Anyway hope you are ok.