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  • That sounds really bad, I could say more but not worth it really, all this is just disheartening

    ​​​​​​I'm glad you didn't pursue it

    ​​​​​
    'Whatever it be wherein ye differ, the decision thereof is with Allah: such is Allah my Lord: In Him I trust, and to Him I turn.' The Holy Qu'ran Al Shura (Consultation)

    So, which of the favours of your lord will you deny? ~ Surah Ar Rahman

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    • Originally posted by Ya'sin View Post

      That sounds really bad, I could say more but not worth it really, all this is just disheartening

      ​​​​​​I'm glad you didn't pursue it

      ​​​​​
      There are plenty of genuine good brothers & sisters out there. Often we only hear the bad stories but they do exist
      https://islamicgemsandpearls.wordpress.com

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      • What is "controlling" behavior anyway? Seems anything a brother does to exercise authority over his wife can now be labelled "controlling".

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        • Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
          What is "controlling" behavior anyway? Seems anything a brother does to exercise authority over his wife can now be labelled "controlling".
          Probably not directed at me but I'd argue forcing her to do things exactly how you want, especially if it's mundane.

          When it comes to bigger issues the husband should have the final say but the little things imo is the difference between authority and "controlling".

          Comment


          • Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
            What is "controlling" behavior anyway? Seems anything a brother does to exercise authority over his wife can now be labelled "controlling".
            Last edited by Layla_; 26-09-19, 05:23 PM.
            https://islamicgemsandpearls.wordpress.com

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            • Controlling

              Scrutinising every little thing and not allowing the wife to have a voice

              A woman doesn't have to agree to her husband, she can always suggest things and that doesn't mean she has transgressed or anything

              It's like team work, you compliment one another

              In the above post about the driving thing, it's pathetic

              Fine you don't want to go the right way, but at least explain to your wife what you are doing because it creates misunderstanding

              Just because she has spoken and said he is going the wrong way, doesn't mean she has crossed her boundaries

              So anything she says will be deemed as going over her limits, he sounds like the typical narcissist

              It is either his way or hell with you, the man divorced her

              That's appalling, awful, absolutely disgraceful
              You might aswell marry a plastic doll they have created because it has neither a mind or a soul





              ​​

              'Whatever it be wherein ye differ, the decision thereof is with Allah: such is Allah my Lord: In Him I trust, and to Him I turn.' The Holy Qu'ran Al Shura (Consultation)

              So, which of the favours of your lord will you deny? ~ Surah Ar Rahman

              Comment


              • Just think about it and put yourself in those shoes

                It's not black and white

                Living like a prisoner is not easy
                'Whatever it be wherein ye differ, the decision thereof is with Allah: such is Allah my Lord: In Him I trust, and to Him I turn.' The Holy Qu'ran Al Shura (Consultation)

                So, which of the favours of your lord will you deny? ~ Surah Ar Rahman

                Comment


                • Reminds me of this famous Hollywood celebrity from the 60s who was found dead in her home

                  She got used for sex and the men didn't care if she had a brain or not
                  She was just something to sleep with

                  In order for a man to understand these things and not abuse his
                  ​​​​ power is to first respect women and to see them as human beings

                  As for controlling, it can be applied in every environment

                  At work for example, who likes the boss always on your case, always something to say, always got a problem, always giving orders

                  No one does
                  'Whatever it be wherein ye differ, the decision thereof is with Allah: such is Allah my Lord: In Him I trust, and to Him I turn.' The Holy Qu'ran Al Shura (Consultation)

                  So, which of the favours of your lord will you deny? ~ Surah Ar Rahman

                  Comment


                  • Thats abit mad
                    excessive gheera is not good

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by Abu julaybeeb View Post

                      Thats abit mad
                      excessive gheera is not good
                      Exactly
                      https://islamicgemsandpearls.wordpress.com

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                      • How old was he?

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                        • Originally posted by Medic View Post

                          How old was he?
                          He was quite old, 36
                          https://islamicgemsandpearls.wordpress.com

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                          • My issue is, every sister is going to define "controlling" differently. So even big things like getting your wife to wear more appropriate clothing, could be viewed as such. Depends on the woman you end up marrying.

                            ​​​​​​

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                            • Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post



                              My issue is, every sister is going to define "controlling" differently. So even big things like getting your wife to wear more appropriate clothing, could be viewed as such. Depends on the woman you end up marrying.

                              ​​​​​​
                              https://islamicgemsandpearls.wordpress.com

                              Comment


                              • I agree. But it also depends. Perhaps her hijab is really good but could use some improvements. Also what happens if the brother becomes more practicing after marriage?

                                Well I can understand a husband's gheerah in that particular situation. But yeah he should work to solve the problem on your behalf in that case

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