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how can us muslim men help women from being in a abusive relationship?

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  • how can us muslim men help women from being in a abusive relationship?

    salaams peeps

    how can us muslim men help women from being in a abusive relationship?

    i think we should be doing more to help

  • #2
    Wa alaykum assalam

    Be an example of how a good man should be and act. If you have a daughter, be the best father and show her affection and teach her self worth.
    Also respect your wife, because that'll teach your son how to treat a woman. Above all, teach them about the teachings of Islam and that'll be sufficient bi'dhnillah.

    Last edited by Umm Uthmaan; 29-06-18, 09:23 PM.
    رَّبِّ ارْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِي صَغِيرًا

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    • #3
      Stop believing you are better than them.

      Comment


      • #4
        Be careful who you let your women folk marry

        you need to do your research get your references and also interrogate him politely lol
        And ask questions that could reveal his charachter and personality



        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Abu 'Abdullaah View Post
          Stop believing you are better than them.
          A non-abusive man will always be "better" than an abusive man.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by Umm Uthmaan View Post
            Wa alaykum assalam

            Be an example of how a good man should be and act. If you have a daughter, be the best father and show her affection and teach her self worth.
            Also respect your wife, because that'll teach your son how to treat a woman. Above all, teach them about the teachings of Islam and that'll be sufficient bi'dhnillah.
            good point

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Indefinable View Post

              A non-abusive man will always be "better" than an abusive man.
              agreed

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              • #8
                Originally posted by Abu julaybeeb View Post
                Be careful who you let your women folk marry

                you need to do your research get your references and also interrogate him politely lol
                And ask questions that could reveal his charachter and personality


                yea you can keep an eye for such men by their personality and traits, especially with all that sweet talk that makes the woman fall for them

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                • #9
                  You can only really help your own women.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Its important to promote the importance of family and extended family and as men we should promote the concept of togethernes meetups family events,enjoy get togethers.
                    This way not only you develop a healthy family ,find out any red flags early also you teach good akhlaq to your kids.

                    Youtube channel - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCYk...dE4pHzSid7Lr0w

                    **** Smiling won't cost you now is it ****

                    Zawjati ,“Uhibbuki mithla mâ antę” “Uhibbuki kaifamâ kunteee”“Wa mahmâ kâna mahma sâra”

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Simply_Logical View Post
                      salaams peeps


                      i think we should be doing more to help
                      I would say raise daughters with high self esteem but then I am reminded of this quote “It is said that if you place a frog in a pot of boiling water it will jump out. Place him in a pot of cold water and turn it up a little at a time, and he will stay until he is boiled to death.”

                      I don't know what makes these women stay and it bothers me. I know some girls, friends of friends; they are professionals with good jobs, wealthy family, attractive, confident but in abusive relationships. I've seen them mentally break down, have health issues due to the abuse but they are scared of leaving because they don't want to be on their own!!!!??/

                      Doesn't make sense to me. I could would never stay in one or put up with it yet these women act like doormats. I have actually lost sympathy for some, it's like a drug addict who refuses to get help.

                      how can us muslim men help women from being in a abusive relationship?
                      Do your research when finding your sister/daughter a spouse. Ask the community, spend time with the guy.
                      Some men believe extreme dominance (which spills out as emotional abuse) and beating your wife is permitted in Islam. Maybe the rest of you men need to set them straight.
                      Women lost their modesty when men lost their gheerah..” .

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by shay5 View Post

                        I would say raise daughters with high self esteem but then I am reminded of this quote “It is said that if you place a frog in a pot of boiling water it will jump out. Place him in a pot of cold water and turn it up a little at a time, and he will stay until he is boiled to death.”

                        I don't know what makes these women stay and it bothers me. I know some girls, friends of friends; they are professionals with good jobs, wealthy family, attractive, confident but in abusive relationships. I've seen them mentally break down, have health issues due to the abuse but they are scared of leaving because they don't want to be on their own!!!!??/

                        Doesn't make sense to me. I could would never stay in one or put up with it yet these women act like doormats. I have actually lost sympathy for some, it's like a drug addict who refuses to get help.



                        Do your research when finding your sister/daughter a spouse. Ask the community, spend time with the guy.
                        Some men believe extreme dominance (which spills out as emotional abuse) and beating your wife is permitted in Islam. Maybe the rest of you men need to set them straight.
                        Its not only daughters but raising good sons too,its a community problem.
                        ​​​​​​if not you will only see an increse in divorce...thats not the end goal here.

                        ​​​​​Most of the time men become abusers due to some past event or broken families,so parents are to blame.
                        Masjids all over here are spending a lot of time to educate the youth about ,family ,values imortance of husband wife etc.....they have workshops ,parental programs etc..


                        It is a way forward.

                        Youtube channel - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCYk...dE4pHzSid7Lr0w

                        **** Smiling won't cost you now is it ****

                        Zawjati ,“Uhibbuki mithla mâ antę” “Uhibbuki kaifamâ kunteee”“Wa mahmâ kâna mahma sâra”

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by shay5 View Post

                          I would say raise daughters with high self esteem but then I am reminded of this quote “It is said that if you place a frog in a pot of boiling water it will jump out. Place him in a pot of cold water and turn it up a little at a time, and he will stay until he is boiled to death.”

                          I don't know what makes these women stay and it bothers me. I know some girls, friends of friends; they are professionals with good jobs, wealthy family, attractive, confident but in abusive relationships. I've seen them mentally break down, have health issues due to the abuse but they are scared of leaving because they don't want to be on their own!!!!??/

                          Doesn't make sense to me. I could would never stay in one or put up with it yet these women act like doormats. I have actually lost sympathy for some, it's like a drug addict who refuses to get help.



                          Do your research when finding your sister/daughter a spouse. Ask the community, spend time with the guy.
                          Some men believe extreme dominance (which spills out as emotional abuse) and beating your wife is permitted in Islam. Maybe the rest of you men need to set them straight.
                          For a women to be divorced alone
                          looking after kids is scary
                          and many still are attachdd to their spouse even if he is abusive

                          very hard to understand till you have your own family

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Abu julaybeeb View Post

                            For a women to be divorced alone
                            looking after kids is scary
                            and many still are attachdd to their spouse even if he is abusive
                            y
                            I wrote something but then thought it would be off topic but since you brought it up I will type it again. Women are criticized for working but when was the last time anyone helped a divorcee get married, was a role model to her children, helped her out financially? Maybe if we had more of a community actively working to help sort out these issues; these women wouldnt be afraid of leaving an abusive home!

                            I say community because a lot of women don't have the support of their parents, either they're too old, ill or deceased etc
                            Women lost their modesty when men lost their gheerah..” .

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by muzzybee View Post

                              Its not only daughters but raising good sons too,its a community problem.
                              ​​​​​​if not you will only see an increse in divorce...thats not the end goal here.

                              ​​​​​Most of the time men become abusers due to some past event or broken families,so parents are to blame.
                              Masjids all over here are spending a lot of time to educate the youth about ,family ,values imortance of husband wife etc.....they have workshops ,parental programs etc..


                              It is a way forward.
                              that's great about the workshops. I was going to mention raising decent sons.Boys seem to get a pass. they stay out late, always up to no good, gfs, drugs but God forbid their daughter look the wrong way and she has brought dishonour to their family.

                              "It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men. - Also stop marrying your abused, unhinged sons to women until they have received some sort of help. When a guy acts up, send him back home as if back home will sort out his issues.
                              Women lost their modesty when men lost their gheerah..” .

                              Comment

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