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the concept of marriage is unfair

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    the concept of marriage is unfair

    When you are young, you could have any person you are attracted to but it’s haram unless you get married, which is highly unlikely. But when you choose to wait, you get ugly and unwanted because life is hard to most of us.
    “Have you seen he who has taken as his god his [own] desire, and Allah has sent him astray due to knowledge and has set a seal upon his hearing and his heart and put over his vision a veil? So who will guide him after Allah ? Then will you not be reminded? And they say, “There is not but our worldly life; we die and live, and nothing destroys us except time.” And they have of that no knowledge; they are only assuming.” Quran 45:23-24

    #2
    It's so unfair that no one will marry me.

    Comment


      #3
      Naaaah, it’s not that bro. It just life is hard now and it’s gonna take me a minute to get married. A minute until I’m old and ugly =[
      “Have you seen he who has taken as his god his [own] desire, and Allah has sent him astray due to knowledge and has set a seal upon his hearing and his heart and put over his vision a veil? So who will guide him after Allah ? Then will you not be reminded? And they say, “There is not but our worldly life; we die and live, and nothing destroys us except time.” And they have of that no knowledge; they are only assuming.” Quran 45:23-24

      Comment


        #4
        :*-(

        Let's wallow in self pity.

        Comment


          #5
          Originally posted by obaid_m View Post
          When you are young, you could have any person you are attracted to but it’s haram unless you get married, which is highly unlikely. But when you choose to wait, you get ugly and unwanted because life is hard to most of us.
          Well it just depends on your situation. If you see somebody you are interested in marrying just approach them and ask them if they will marry you, you could message them on facebook or text or have a mutual friend ask them for you. Another method is for you to go on those muslim matrimonial sites and make a profile and message woman you are interested in. Alhamdulilah I have a lot of experience when it comes to woman and the thing I learned is that woman will not approach you, woman want you to approach them and in order to get married your going to have to take some shots lol and if you get rejected, its okay there are plenty of available woman you can ask and dont stop until you find one that will want to marry you inshallah.

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by obaid_m View Post
            When you are young, you could have any person you are attracted to but it’s haram unless you get married, which is highly unlikely. But when you choose to wait, you get ugly and unwanted because life is hard to most of us.
            Are you saying you will get physically unappealing with age or that you will find someone unappealing?

            Regardless, focus on Ramadhaan and make sincere du'a.

            Comment


              #7
              I understand what you are saying

              It is unfair for those brothers that want to get married young but are restricted because they are not financially stable. That's one reason.

              When they become a bit more 'established' the side effects of that includes losing hair, putting on weight (can be bad or good), other changes in appearance, or physically just becoming less energised.

              No right answer on what the 'prime' age is for men, maybe 25?

              Some people age gracefully. It's their attitude that is charming and some women fall for that.

              But don't think that way as it's damaging for your confidence (I should know). It leads to stress and age is out of your control. You can TRY to get married young but that would require zeal from your part.

              I know of one brother that is a teenager and he has started searching, good on him! If he finds someone in sha Allah he will get his nikah done.
              'Whatever it be wherein ye differ, the decision thereof is with Allah: such is Allah my Lord: In Him I trust, and to Him I turn.' The Holy Qu'ran Al Shura (Consultation)

              So, which of the favours of your lord will you deny? ~ Surah Ar Rahman

              Comment


                #8
                No ones saying u cant look
                there are still people who would be willing to get married
                maybe a smaller minority but they are still out there
                relig
                some would just like to get nikkah done while not established as well

                have tawakul
                if your trying to do something halal then go for it and ask Allah at the same time in duaa

                just dont say u can provide if u cant

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by Ya'sin View Post
                  I understand what you are saying

                  It is unfair for those brothers that want to get married young but are restricted because they are not financially stable. That's one reason.

                  When they become a bit more 'established' the side effects of that includes losing hair, putting on weight (can be bad or good), other changes in appearance, or physically just becoming less energised.

                  No right answer on what the 'prime' age is for men, maybe 25?

                  Some people age gracefully. It's their attitude that is charming and some women fall for that.

                  But don't think that way as it's damaging for your confidence (I should know). It leads to stress and age is out of your control. You can TRY to get married young but that would require zeal from your part.

                  I know of one brother that is a teenager and he has started searching, good on him! If he finds someone in sha Allah he will get his nikah done.
                  Inshallah, I am hoping that the woman will look for inner beauty and character and you will find a woman that is looking for that and islam and inshallah the money and finances should inshallah come. I was blessed to get married when I was 21 and understand how helpful and beautiful it is to be married so I am praying for you that Allah opens that door for you so you can enjoy that blessing.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    You won't find any sympathy here, that's for sure.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      sort of agree. I think it is more the financial situation which does not allow marriage at a earlier age.

                      I am 21 going on 22 soon and have resigned myself to not getting married probably.
                      Just the circumstances make it near impossible.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Originally posted by obaid_m View Post
                        When you are young, you could have any person you are attracted to but it’s haram unless you get married, which is highly unlikely. But when you choose to wait, you get ugly and unwanted because life is hard to most of us.
                        Thats supposed to be a reason to claim the concept of marriage is unfair?
                        ​​​​​​
                        I think its about time you manned up

                        The concept of marriage came from Allah عز و جل as such it is impossible that it can be unfair.

                        What can be unfair is the cultural nonsense and the antics of the kuffar /Mushrikun if you are following them.
                        Last edited by Saif-Uddin; 15-05-18, 04:15 PM.
                        http://www.ilovepalestine.com/campai...imesinGaza.gif

                        "It does not befit the lion to answer the dogs."

                        – Imam al-Shafi’i (Rahimahullah)

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Originally posted by Saif-Uddin View Post

                          Thats supposed to be a reason to claim the concept of marriage is unfair?
                          ​​​​​​
                          I think its about time you manned up

                          The concept of marriage came from Allah عز و جل as such it is impossible that it can be unfair.

                          What can be unfair is the cultural nonsense and the antics kf the kuffar /Mushrikun if you are following them.
                          you really are a lion of tawhid.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
                            You won't find any sympathy here, that's for sure.
                            Akhi its a shame really to see some man-babies asking fkr sympathy

                            جزاك الله خيرا
                            http://www.ilovepalestine.com/campai...imesinGaza.gif

                            "It does not befit the lion to answer the dogs."

                            – Imam al-Shafi’i (Rahimahullah)

                            Comment


                              #15
                              --
                              Last edited by Ya'sin; 15-05-18, 06:10 PM.
                              'Whatever it be wherein ye differ, the decision thereof is with Allah: such is Allah my Lord: In Him I trust, and to Him I turn.' The Holy Qu'ran Al Shura (Consultation)

                              So, which of the favours of your lord will you deny? ~ Surah Ar Rahman

                              Comment

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