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Muslim Men In Abusive Marriages.

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  • Fakhri
    replied
    I recall listening to a radio show a long time ago now, back when I used to listen to the radio - yes, mentioning that as I don't want to endorse listening to the radio! (Mostly pointless/insidiously harmful chatter) ...
    ​​​​​
    ... It was a phone-in with the topic of discussion being domestic abuse perpetrated on men by women.

    One particular case I remember was a man who was a martial arts instructor by profession, physically very big, capable, etc, who had endured years of violence from his partner / wife.

    Obviously, this man could have very easily overpowered a woman, but she would become violent and attack him with pans, pots and other such things.

    The man was quite calm in explaining all of this I seem to remember, and it seemed as though this was someone allowing himself to go through all of this as a loving parent might with a violent child with severe behavioural issues.

    Maybe he went into that marriage thinking he would be able to change, manage his partner's issues. We have all sorts of people carrying all sorts of baggage, this disorder, that disorder...

    The only defence I can think of excluding those already mentioned above, if it can rightly be called a defence, is that when a person might grow to love someone as their wife and also the mother of their children, and they obviously know of the person's good qualities, you can see why they might put up with that type of thing for some time. I've never been in the situation so I wouldn't know what it's like... On the outside it really seems unthinkable that I would let a woman physically abuse me at all, personally.

    But thinking a bit deeper, if I was to marry someone and then some years down the line, something sets off some sort of issues, a change in behaviour maybe from emotional trauma, etc...

    The case above is of course in relation to kuffaar, though I can still see it possibly happening with Muslims. Still, I agree, it's difficult to see something like this happening with practicing Muslim husbands and wives.


    (Allah Ta'aalaa keep us from such things.)

    ​​​​​​

    Leave a comment:


  • Saif-Uddin
    replied
    Originally posted by Indefinable View Post

    Brother, are you calling the victim of abuse - a "man-baby"?
    spineless men who can't stand up for themselves aka Man-babies, can hardly claim to be victims

    جزاك الله خيرا

    Last edited by Saif-Uddin; 09-05-18, 11:38 PM.

    Leave a comment:


  • Ya'sin
    replied
    What about people that tell Muslim women to suffer in silence and to have patience because it could mean they enter heaven.

    I used to think that, yes, if we just suffer then perhaps we will get rewarded. That's deluded.

    It doesn't sound right but this is what some communities tell women, to have sabr and leave the husband doing as he wishes.

    When a woman challenges her husband for being an idiot it means she is a brainwashed maniac (no, I am not referring to Abu Kamel's post but it got me thinking).

    The question is, should Muslim women suffer in silence to avoid getting a divorce, in the hopes of getting rewarded in the here after?

    Or

    Should we start helping Muslim women to understand that they should not tolerate an iiresponsible husband who continues with his impermissible acts?




    Leave a comment:


  • Indefinable
    replied
    Originally posted by Saif-Uddin View Post

    We have an abundance of man babies nowadays unfortunately.

    جزاك الله خيرا
    Brother, are you calling the victim of abuse - a "man-baby"?

    Leave a comment:


  • Saif-Uddin
    replied
    Originally posted by Indefinable View Post

    I assumed the man had Autism or something of the sort (when I first read of this) but he didn't. He was a "regular" guy. Who just happened to be beaten up and terrorised by his partner. She is smaller than him physically (article had pictures). I guess anything and everything is possible in this day and age.

    Scientists are probably experimenting with pigs and adding wings to them. If Dolly the Sheep is real then why not flying pigs?

    La hawla wa la quwwata illa billaah.
    We have an abundance of man babies nowadays unfortunately.

    جزاك الله خيرا

    Leave a comment:


  • Indefinable
    replied
    Originally posted by Saif-Uddin View Post

    The general rule is men are stronger than women,

    Of course the feminists will say otherwise.

    Allah عز و جل told us he's given one strength over the other, of course exceptions exist, although the man who gets slapped around by his wife is probably mentally weak and not physically.
    I assumed the man had Autism or something of the sort (when I first read of this) but he didn't. He was a "regular" guy. Who just happened to be beaten up and terrorised by his partner. She is smaller than him physically (article had pictures). I guess anything and everything is possible in this day and age.

    Scientists are probably experimenting with pigs and adding wings to them. If Dolly the Sheep is real then why not flying pigs?

    La hawla wa la quwwata illa billaah.

    Leave a comment:


  • Indefinable
    replied
    Originally posted by Abu Kamel View Post
    Domestic Violence Against Men Widespread ( in KSA)
    http://www.arabnews.com/saudi-arabia/news/734236

    The reality is: Kafir/Taghut media repeatedly give voice to Muslim women, and maids, as victims who need to be championed, and who's problems mean societies and cultures must change to improve women's and maids' circumstances. This has been a constant drumbeat and cry for decades, increasing in recent years so that women perceive themselves as victims who deserve to be outraged, deserve greater rights, deserve freedoms, deserve powers and authorities over their affairs, deserve to CHANGE culture and society.

    This constant propagation has served to penetrate Arabian societies ( Gulf, and Saudi rural, urban). Many Saudis, male and female, have been educated in the West so they have developed different perspectives from traditional Saudi views of genders, social relations, etc.

    So there has been a growing trend in Arabia of women being victims who NEED and DESERVE to change society. Sadly, many do not know how society will be changed. But this cultural and societal trend has been constant for decades as planned and designed in the West. Part of their plan is to "open" Arabia, which they really mean is secularize and liberalize Arabia to be conducive Western ideological interests.

    Arab women violence against men is a byproduct of this 'Liberalization" of Arabia. And women have been caught up in this by acting out against men in their lives, regardless of the cause, justified or not.

    There are other articles at Arabnews wherein Arab women interviewed essentially 'blame male victims' as causing women to being violent. But the reality is the constant ideological assault causes underlying tensions and conflict even within the Arab family itself. Many women feel entitled to being violent, deserve to strike and attack men in their lives.

    There is a WAR being waged against Islam, Muslims, and Muslim belief in Islam. MAKE NO MISTAKE. Western powers have utterly imprisoned ulama and silenced every masjid in Arabia. Meanwhile, American and western societies continue to empower the most violent and extremist political views against Islam, where America has elected Trump, brought Mike Pompeo to power in State dept, and John Bolton as NSC advisor, the highest most important political offices beneath the US presidency, setting the trend throughout the world. American preachers have been calling for Holy War (of Shaytan) against Muslims since 9/11.

    It is fair to speculate that the trend in Arabia itself could be a precursor or building up to the state of affairs the Prophet (saws) described in his noble prophetic narrations about women being drawn to Masih Dajjal and believers having to tie up their women to keep them from joining him.
    I never really thought of it like this to be honest. Always assumed it was just Feminism brainwashing women so that they could be seen as "equal" in the eyes of society.

    I do, however, believe there is truth to what you say. The power dynamics between the genders has changed. Had no idea KSA - had this issue too. A real eye opener.

    Leave a comment:


  • Saif-Uddin
    replied
    Originally posted by Indefinable View Post

    I'm just baffled that women are physically stronger than men.

    I'm sure a man could easily overpower the woman. So why take abuse? On a regular basis?

    The general rule is men are stronger than women,

    Of course the feminists will say otherwise.

    Allah عز و جل told us he's given one strength over the other, of course exceptions exist, although the man who gets slapped around by his wife is probably mentally weak and not physically.

    Leave a comment:


  • Faith reloaded
    replied
    Originally posted by Indefinable View Post

    I refuse to believe that. It doesn't seem likely.
    Yah, thats true

    i assume these women are in the tiny, tiny minority

    Leave a comment:


  • Indefinable
    replied
    Originally posted by Stoic Believer View Post
    I'd say women who are abusive tend to go for verbal abuse rather than physical.
    Yeah, could be verbal and emotional. But physical seems a bit far fetched.

    Leave a comment:


  • Indefinable
    replied
    Originally posted by Faith reloaded View Post

    some ladies these days are androgynous and hitting the gym and taking anabolic steroids

    they can do some damage and put up a good fight against a male who doesnt do the same
    I refuse to believe that. It doesn't seem likely.

    Leave a comment:


  • Abu Kamel
    replied
    Holy Quran (TMQ) 4:76
    Those who believe fight in the cause of Allah , and those who disbelieve fight in the cause of Taghut. So fight against the allies of Satan. Indeed, the plot of Satan has ever been weak.

    Leave a comment:


  • Abu Kamel
    replied
    The effort 'Holy War' of the Tawaghit powers has used the social status and position of women in the Muslim world as the wedge issue to further push Muslim societies away from Islam, as evident in the Tunisian law to allow Tunisian Muslim women to marry kufar men.

    http://www.bbc.com/news/world-africa-41278610

    While this is not always necessary to raise, there should be awareness from the believer of e following:

    Jabir reported that Allah’s Messenger SAW said:

    “Iblis places his throne upon water; he then sends detachments (for creating dissension) ; the nearer to him in rank are those who are most notorious in creating dissension. One of them comes and says: “I did so and so.” And he says: “You have done nothing.” Then one amongst them comes and says: “I did not spare so and so until I sowed the seed of discord between a husband and a wife.” The Satan goes near him and says: “You have done well.” A’mash said: He then embraces him.” [Sahih Muslim]

    The kufar are slaves of Shaytan, slaves of the Taghut. They appear to be superior in material things, but they are truly slaves of the most evil enemy of mankind. Most don't know it. Some do, and they are tied to the actual worship of Shaytan in their Occult practices.

    Leave a comment:


  • Abu Kamel
    replied
    Domestic Violence Against Men Widespread ( in KSA)
    http://www.arabnews.com/saudi-arabia/news/734236

    The reality is: Kafir/Taghut media repeatedly give voice to Muslim women, and maids, as victims who need to be championed, and who's problems mean societies and cultures must change to improve women's and maids' circumstances. This has been a constant drumbeat and cry for decades, increasing in recent years so that women perceive themselves as victims who deserve to be outraged, deserve greater rights, deserve freedoms, deserve powers and authorities over their affairs, deserve to CHANGE culture and society.

    This constant propagation has served to penetrate Arabian societies ( Gulf, and Saudi rural, urban). Many Saudis, male and female, have been educated in the West so they have developed different perspectives from traditional Saudi views of genders, social relations, etc.

    So there has been a growing trend in Arabia of women being victims who NEED and DESERVE to change society. Sadly, many do not know how society will be changed. But this cultural and societal trend has been constant for decades as planned and designed in the West. Part of their plan is to "open" Arabia, which they really mean is secularize and liberalize Arabia to be conducive Western ideological interests.

    Arab women violence against men is a byproduct of this 'Liberalization" of Arabia. And women have been caught up in this by acting out against men in their lives, regardless of the cause, justified or not.

    There are other articles at Arabnews wherein Arab women interviewed essentially 'blame male victims' as causing women to being violent. But the reality is the constant ideological assault causes underlying tensions and conflict even within the Arab family itself. Many women feel entitled to being violent, deserve to strike and attack men in their lives.

    There is a WAR being waged against Islam, Muslims, and Muslim belief in Islam. MAKE NO MISTAKE. Western powers have utterly imprisoned ulama and silenced every masjid in Arabia. Meanwhile, American and western societies continue to empower the most violent and extremist political views against Islam, where America has elected Trump, brought Mike Pompeo to power in State dept, and John Bolton as NSC advisor, the highest most important political offices beneath the US presidency, setting the trend throughout the world. American preachers have been calling for Holy War (of Shaytan) against Muslims since 9/11.

    It is fair to speculate that the trend in Arabia itself could be a precursor or building up to the state of affairs the Prophet (saws) described in his noble prophetic narrations about women being drawn to Masih Dajjal and believers having to tie up their women to keep them from joining him.

    Leave a comment:


  • Faith reloaded
    replied
    Originally posted by Indefinable View Post

    I'm just baffled that women are physically stronger than men.

    I'm sure a man could easily overpower the woman. So why take abuse? On a regular basis?

    some ladies these days are androgynous and hitting the gym and taking anabolic steroids

    they can do some damage and put up a good fight against a male who doesnt do the same
    Last edited by Faith reloaded; 04-05-18, 08:53 AM.

    Leave a comment:

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