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Secret Mariage and denying parents rights

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  • Secret Mariage and denying parents rights

    when I was 17 years old I met a girl non muslim a few weeks after I told my parents I found the right girl to marry but my parents tried to tell me Iwas to young and I had think about my EDUCATION .
    I REALLY THOUGHT SHE IS THE ONE AND DID NOT BELIEVE ANYTHING MY PARENTS SAID .FEW MONTHS LATER SHE DUMPT ME FOR ANTHER GUY .

    MY PARENTS AGAIN SAID MY EDUCATION IS VERY IMPORTANT AND FOR ME TO PAY ATENTION IHAD ALONG ROAD AHEAD OF ME I SAID I WAS STUPID TO THINK ABO UT MARRIAGE THEN .
    AYEAR LATER I MET ANTHER GIRL AND GUESS WHAT I DID THE SAME THING
    MY POOR PARENTS AGAIN TRIED TO WAKE ME UP THAT RELATIONSHIP ENDED AS WELL.

    NOW IAM 19 YEARS OLD AND THIS TIME IFOUND THE GIRL THAT I THINK ISTHE ONE I WANT TO MARRY ITOLD MY PARENTS THEY SAID IWAS STUPID TO DO THAT BEFORE I FINISH MY EDUCATION .
    AND THEY SAID I AM TO YOUNG .

    SO I WENT AND GOT ENGAGED AND MARRIED WITHOUT TELLING THEM.
    I WAS LYING AND IAM STILL LYING TO THEM I AM TREATING THEM WITH NO RESPECT AND I TOLD THEM THEY R STUPID MANY OTHER NAMES THAT WE SHOULD NOT SAY TO A PARENT.
    AND BY THE WAY THE GIRL IS A REVERT

  • #2
    Re: Secret Mariage and denying parents rights

    r u stl 2geda vid da lzt grl?!?! 0r iz it ended :S

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Secret Mariage and denying parents rights

      looooooooooooool pagal ladoo is agony aunt :D
      Watch this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nvM7L5Wm7q0

      ‎"If she's not on the deen, she's not fit to be your queen. If he hasn't got imaan, he's not fit to be your man."



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      • #4
        Re: Secret Mariage and denying parents rights

        Originally posted by Ibn Khattab View Post
        looooooooooooool pagal ladoo is agony aunt :D

        l0ooo00o0oo0o0ol plz in da bin man i aint tryna b n0 agny aunt i juz vntd 2 mke sre da lzt grl e v0z stl vidd er :p:hidban: :hidban: :hidban:

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        • #5
          Re: Secret Mariage and denying parents rights

          looooooool pagal ladooo u make me crack up man, tht wos ur first serious post ive seen.

          the guy neeeds ur help show us ur skills
          Watch this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nvM7L5Wm7q0

          ‎"If she's not on the deen, she's not fit to be your queen. If he hasn't got imaan, he's not fit to be your man."



          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Secret Mariage and denying parents rights

            Originally posted by Ibn Khattab View Post
            looooooool pagal ladooo u make me crack up man, tht wos ur first serious post ive seen.

            the guy neeeds ur help show us ur skills
            in da bin man ur makin me:embar: nw ive dun l0odzaa seri0uz p0ztz:D

            ll0o0o0o0ol plz in da bin i dnt ave n0 elpin skilz ven sum1z g0ta a pr0blm i juz mk a j0k 0ut 0f it n dn da pers0nz lak fnxz u elpd l0dz L0OO0O00O0OL :rofl1:

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            • #7
              Re: Secret Mariage and denying parents rights

              You're obviously aware of the way you're treating your parents by accepting the fact that you're showing no respect towards them, their judgement, and their concern for your education and welfare. I don't really think anything I say will change your mind, but I'll say it anyway. I believe honesty is the way to go forward with this one. Acquaint your parents with what you have done, and if you believe your education is worth pursuing then do that too. Good luck with whatever decision you come to. :)
              "Think for yourselves and let others enjoy the privilege to do so too" Essay on Tolerance, Voltaire

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              • #8
                Re: Secret Mariage and denying parents rights

                edit
                Last edited by hayatto; 11-03-12, 06:27 PM.
                أشهد أن لا إله إلاَّ الله و أشهد أن محمد رسول الله

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                • #9
                  Re: Secret Mariage and denying parents rights

                  you think you would have learnt form the first 2 times

                  anywya when ur parents tell you to get an education do u think they get anything out of ur education, they only say it so you dont struggle in life later :(

                  all i can say is make it upto them some how before its too late :(
                  Some claim that u are like any one of us, But who can claim, to have visited the Arsh? We say bashr, but respect is also due. For mankind are like rocks, but a pearl are u. U travelled the 7Heavens, and ur eyes did not lie. For Jibril could not pass, but u, O Madani, glided by.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Secret Mariage and denying parents rights

                    Its simple really.

                    Your mother and father brought you into this world, fed you , clothed, you and sheltered you, and looked after you, always thought the best of you and for you.

                    And if you to this type of thing, its like turning your back on them and sticking your fist up in the air ( like u just dont care.. :P ) Its a type of betrayal IMO.

                    Sorry if thats harsh but thats how it is man.
                    Last edited by Arsalan; 13-10-06, 08:37 PM.
                    "Closer and closer to mankind comes their Reckoning: yet they heed not and they turn away" (21:1)

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                    • #11
                      Re: Secret Mariage and denying parents rights

                      I told my parents some of the stuff they get very hurt and angry and said if you have already done that stuff you don't need us anymore.
                      They asked me if i am stupid, should I expect them to support me?
                      I am very upset because they called me stupid should i be or not.
                      And i am their only son.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Secret Mariage and denying parents rights

                        Originally posted by cece View Post
                        when I was 17 years old I met a girl non muslim a few weeks after I told my parents I found the right girl to marry but my parents tried to tell me Iwas to young and I had think about my EDUCATION .
                        I REALLY THOUGHT SHE IS THE ONE AND DID NOT BELIEVE ANYTHING MY PARENTS SAID .FEW MONTHS LATER SHE DUMPT ME FOR ANTHER GUY .

                        MY PARENTS AGAIN SAID MY EDUCATION IS VERY IMPORTANT AND FOR ME TO PAY ATENTION IHAD ALONG ROAD AHEAD OF ME I SAID I WAS STUPID TO THINK ABO UT MARRIAGE THEN .
                        AYEAR LATER I MET ANTHER GIRL AND GUESS WHAT I DID THE SAME THING
                        MY POOR PARENTS AGAIN TRIED TO WAKE ME UP THAT RELATIONSHIP ENDED AS WELL.

                        NOW IAM 19 YEARS OLD AND THIS TIME IFOUND THE GIRL THAT I THINK ISTHE ONE I WANT TO MARRY ITOLD MY PARENTS THEY SAID IWAS STUPID TO DO THAT BEFORE I FINISH MY EDUCATION .
                        AND THEY SAID I AM TO YOUNG .

                        SO I WENT AND GOT ENGAGED AND MARRIED WITHOUT TELLING THEM.
                        I WAS LYING AND IAM STILL LYING TO THEM I AM TREATING THEM WITH NO RESPECT AND I TOLD THEM THEY R STUPID MANY OTHER NAMES THAT WE SHOULD NOT SAY TO A PARENT.
                        AND BY THE WAY THE GIRL IS A REVERT
                        you think ur the only one with feelings
                        Some claim that u are like any one of us, But who can claim, to have visited the Arsh? We say bashr, but respect is also due. For mankind are like rocks, but a pearl are u. U travelled the 7Heavens, and ur eyes did not lie. For Jibril could not pass, but u, O Madani, glided by.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Secret Mariage and denying parents rights

                          Originally posted by cece View Post
                          I told my parents some of the stuff they get very hurt and angry and said if you have already done that stuff you don't need us anymore.
                          They asked me if i am stupid, should I expect them to support me?
                          I am very upset because they called me stupid should i be or not.
                          Look iam not trying to make u feel bad.

                          But honestly look at it from ur parents perspective, they feel have indirectly rejected them through this secretive activity.

                          A marriage of their son or daughter is something any parent would lvoe to be involved in, it is something they look forward to ALL their lives. And this has broken their hearts.

                          Iam saying this coz ive seen it happen

                          You can repair the damage. By firstly accepting this was wrong, and seeking their forgivenss, and sacrriciging ur desires at this time to make them happy in their old age.

                          When parents are upset and angry, they say things like "stupid" , or as in my langauge punjaby.. well i wont say it here.. but suffice is to say, they would put Dr Dre to shame.
                          "Closer and closer to mankind comes their Reckoning: yet they heed not and they turn away" (21:1)

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                          • #14
                            Re: Secret Mariage and denying parents rights

                            but i think iam right and they r wrong because from what i read i dont need there permision to get married to who ever i want

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: Secret Mariage and denying parents rights

                              Cece how can you be so angry that they called you "stupid" when you have called them the same and worse, as you have said? :(
                              It's a very upsetting situation... also I feel sorry for ur wife, did she know you have kept it secret from ur family?? and also about ur past with these 2 other girls :S
                              Insha allah you have to try 2 make amends with ur parents... its really serious. You cant get angry with them calling you stupid or anything, let's face it brother... what you have done and how you behaved is wrong. Yes you dont need their permission so to speak, but this is not the way to conduct ones self. There is not going to be any barakah in marriage done secretly and lying to parents. If they had no reason apart from ur age.. I am sure you could have convinced them to agree, with a little effort. Well anyway, what is done is done..so insha allah go with ur wife and try to show them that from now on u can act like a decent son to them and treat them with full respect and islamic manners. Make tawba and ask forgiveness for them and try to treat them correctly from now on.
                              .: Rufaida :.
                              .:Fa Firroo Ila-llaah:.
                              http://s61.photobucket.com/albums/h6...th_Silence.jpg
                              “People praise you for what they suppose is in you,
                              but you must blame your soul for what you know is in you.”
                              ~ Ibn Atallah

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