Home school or not?

[Queeen16021]

Basically, I want to home school my boy who will be going to secondary school in one year. I'm just not sure about the socialising side of life for him.So I'm really confused as to whether I home school or just send him to secondary school.Times are changing so much and there are so many things going on in schools now than before. He would have his tutor online. Has anyone had this experience where they socialise as well as home school and if so, how? What are your thoughts?

Jazakallahukhair

[Hamza1416]

salam alaykum wa rahmat allah
if you live in a kaffir country it better to homeschool your children
i advice you to follow this sister because she knows alot about homeschooling and you will enefit alot from her inshaeallah
https://www.facebook.com/UmmKhalidMuslimMom

[AbuNajm]

Basically, I want to home school my boy who will be going to secondary school in one year. I'm just not sure about the socialising side of life for him.So I'm really confused as to whether I home school or just send him to secondary school.Times are changing so much and there are so many things going on in schools now than before. He would have his tutor online. Has anyone had this experience where they socialise as well as home school and if so, how? What are your thoughts?

Jazakallahukhair

"Socialization" is a secular term that really means "acculturation" or "assimilation". As Muslims, we are not allowed to have our children mix with Disbelievers. The result is our children will act like them and think like them. This is forbidden in Islam and as a parent, you are sinful and failing as a parent if you voluntarily expose your children to Disbelievers and their culture.

Homeschooling is not an "option" for Muslims in the West- it is an obligation. Anyone who says differently either doesn't understand what's at stake or their agenda is contrary to Islam.

[dezert hunta]

"Socialization" is a secular term that really means "acculturation" or "assimilation". As Muslims, we are not allowed to have our children mix with Disbelievers. The result is our children will act like them and think like them. This is forbidden in Islam and as a parent, you are sinful and failing as a parent if you voluntarily expose your children to Disbelievers and their culture.

Homeschooling is not an "option" for Muslims in the West- it is an obligation. Anyone who says differently either doesn't understand what's at stake or their agenda is contrary to Islam.

Assalamu alaykum

I have the same situation and concern as the sister, i totally believe and agree with what you said akhi, but where i live and the school my kids go or will go to is 95% muslim, the area i live in is alhamdulillah 95% muslim to.

I would rather they do homeschooling but i understand what the sister wants for kids as i want the same, i think she would agree when i said socialising i dont mean in the same.sence as the west.....i want my kids to know how to talk and self develop through life experience. Talk to people his age. Learn to be diligent experience liars and not to trust people etc make good friends. All human beings need a form of good friendship and not be alone. How do we go about doing this?

I personally dont have a big family or atleast practising family as most other people here who homeschool their kids do.

What would you recommend under those circumstances?

[AbuNajm]

Assalamu alaykum

I have the same situation and concern as the sister, i totally believe and agree with what you said akhi, but where i live and the school my kids go or will go to is 95% muslim, the area i live in is alhamdulillah 95% muslim to.

I would rather they do homeschooling but i understand what the sister wants for kids as i want the same, i think she would agree when i said socialising i dont mean in the same.sence as the west.....i want my kids to know how to talk and self develop through life experience. Talk to people his age. Learn to be diligent experience liars and not to trust people etc make good friends. All human beings need a form of good friendship and not be alone. How do we go about doing this?

I personally dont have a big family or atleast practising family as most other people here who homeschool their kids do.

What would you recommend under those circumstances?

Wa Alaykum us-Salaam,

In the West, even if the community is 95% Muslim, one has to be careful of the flag-waving, big-box retailer meat eating, birthday celebrating, Harry Potter watching, Friday only Muslims. You don't want your children around this type of Muslim. It's even more confusing for them than being around 100% Kuffaar.

The education of a child is the parents' responsibility- not the state, not the community, not the local school board.

"Socializing" is not something that children do on their own safely. Most public areas in the West are full of perverted, deviant, polytheistic messaging.

Most "socialized" children end up befriending a small group of 2 to 3 other children at most. Many children even end up having only 1 good friend that they hang out with all the time and a small group of friends that they see at social functions and gatherings.

As Muslims, our "social" functions and gathering should revolve around the Masjid and Madrasah.

As a parent, you should look to find 1 or 2 other families in your community who are not typical "westernized Muslims" and arrange days and times when your children can go on field trips, play together and hang out for a short time.

Don't conflate the process of "socialization" with your responsibilities in "education".

[dezert hunta]

Wa Alaykum us-Salaam,

In the West, even if the community is 95% Muslim, one has to be careful of the flag-waving, big-box retailer meat eating, birthday celebrating, Harry Potter watching, Friday only Muslims. You don't want your children around this type of Muslim. It's even more confusing for them than being around 100% Kuffaar.

The education of a child is the parents' responsibility- not the state, not the community, not the local school board.

"Socializing" is not something that children do on their own safely. Most public areas in the West are full of perverted, deviant, polytheistic messaging.

Most "socialized" children end up befriending a small group of 2 to 3 other children at most. Many children even end up having only 1 good friend that they hang out with all the time and a small group of friends that they see at social functions and gatherings.

As Muslims, our "social" functions and gathering should revolve around the Masjid and Madrasah.

As a parent, you should look to find 1 or 2 other families in your community who are not typical "westernized Muslims" and arrange days and times when your children can go on field trips, play together and hang out for a short time.

Don't conflate the process of "socialization" with your responsibilities in "education".

JazakAllahu khair for your reply brother, good advice but not practical as you cant just find families to hang out with. Its easier to mingle with kuffar or less practising muslums then it is with practising muslims. Unfortunately.

[AbuNajm]

JazakAllahu khair for your reply brother, good advice but not practical as you cant just find families to hang out with. Its easier to mingle with kuffar or less practising muslums then it is with practising muslims. Unfortunately.

Let's pretend that I've been there, done that.

No company is better than bad company.

We're not talking about what's "easier" when talking about homeschooling and raising Muslim children in the West.

[dezert hunta]

Let's pretend that I've been there, done that.

No company is better than bad company.

We're not talking about what's "easier" when talking about homeschooling and raising Muslim children in the West.

Very true,

Can i ask when your homeschooling ..... can you give me an insight on.......

School curriculum?

How do you plan your kids class time during a day/week?

What subject do you teach?

exams?

do your kids enjoy it?

How do you split teaching your kids with your wife?

How do you split your work and teaching kids?

[AbuNajm]

Very true,

Can i ask when your homeschooling ..... can you give me an insight on.......

Sure

School curriculum?

We used several different online platforms since none were available to us through state-sponsored, free programs due to living outside the US.

https://mrnussbaum.com/
Free World U
https://www.ixl.com/
Khan Academy

How do you plan your kids class time during a day/week?

Most of the day, beginning around 8am, is dedicated to completing online course work and exercises related to that course work. Usually studies ended around 1-2pm.

That time can be broken up due to things like going to the store or time outside during the winter months since day light hours are shortened and it's better for children to spend at least some time outside before dark and cold set in.

What subject do you teach?

I took on most of the math tutoring after 10th grade, but even then, my involvement was minimal due to work.

exams?

There were very few, if any, exams except the GED exams at the end of secondary schooling.

do your kids enjoy it?

Definitely not. But education is not for "enjoyment"; even less so when it's done from home and under the supervision of one's own parents. Most of the subjects that children "enjoy" like art, physical education, social studies, were excluded from our approach. We only focused on English language arts, Arabic, Quran, mathematics and sciences.

The subjects that our son "enjoyed" were studied on his own time and for physical education he studied Judo at a local dojo where we were able to monitor closely his participation so that he didn't do any of the traditional Japanese customs like bowing and prostrating to the images of the founding sensei. Also, we didn't allow him to train with or compete against females. He had to forfeit several tournament placements due to that.

How do you split teaching your kids with your wife?

There was no split. My wife did almost all of the teaching. I helped plan the approach as our son grew and paid for the tools and courses.

How do you split your work and teaching kids?

I didn't have to.

[dezert hunta]

Brother, jazakAllahu khair wa Allahuma barik lahum, you and your wife done well, i commend you for that may ALLAH swt reward you and your family abd bless your child/ren.

[dezert hunta]

Thanks soo much for the advice

[AbuNajm]

Thanks soo much for the advice

You're welcome, afwaan, anytime.

[AbuMubarak]

"Socialization" is a secular term that really means "acculturation" or "assimilation". As Muslims, we are not allowed to have our children mix with Disbelievers. The result is our children will act like them and think like them. This is forbidden in Islam and as a parent, you are sinful and failing as a parent if you voluntarily expose your children to Disbelievers and their culture.

Homeschooling is not an "option" for Muslims in the West- it is an obligation. Anyone who says differently either doesn't understand what's at stake or their agenda is contrary to Islam.

Well said