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Divorce and older children

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  • Divorce and older children



    Everyone agrees that divorce negatively impacts children in one way or another.

    A lot of couples remain together for the sake of the children. What about gray divorce and divorcing when the children are at least off to college. Is it better? Do adult children handle divorce better? Is it easier to remarry when they are older?

    What are your thoughts or experiences on this.

  • #2


    Children are very resilient I don't believe it's always a negative experience

    Easier to remarry when you are older? must be joking

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    • #3
      You will defo get a lot of proposals and some will be immature men, too modern or too young who want to matt you. Either way you will have to be picky and find someone who fits with you or in the same boat cos they will get you better.

      A lot divorcees are single not cos they arent any potentials, cos there are tons of people available, but cos they want someone in the same boat as them so the relationship has grounding based on shared experiences and better to get the other person that way.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by tevejat View Post


        Children are very resilient I don't believe it's always a negative experience

        Easier to remarry when you are older? must be joking
        No, I mean easier on the children.

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        • #5
          Originally posted by Flawed View Post
          You will defo get a lot of proposals and some will be immature men, too modern or too young who want to matt you. Either way you will have to be picky and find someone who fits with you or in the same boat cos they will get you better.

          A lot divorcees are single not cos they arent any potentials, cos there are tons of people available, but cos they want someone in the same boat as them so the relationship has grounding based on shared experiences and better to get the other person that way.
          that don't make sense, loads of divorcees about male and female so you have the same boat

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          • #6
            Originally posted by LaylaAb View Post

            No, I mean easier on the children.
            dunno tbf

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            • #7
              On another note.

              Dont want to get off topic here or is this still on topic.

              If a woman is in her early 40s, once she gets divorced, why would it be harder??Aren't their older men who will find her age perfectly fine. I mean what 20 year old woman is going to marry a 50 year old man?? It's not like the 40 year old woman is going to marry a 25 or even 35 year old man, in most cases anyway. Or do older single men not exist. I'm sure they do, probably divorced too.

              Actually I know a couple who have grown children both divorced and are now married in their late 50s. I'm sure more exist. Especially if you're not interested in having children again, but want just companionship.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by LaylaAb View Post
                On another note.

                Dont want to get off topic here or is this still on topic.

                If a woman is in her early 40s, once she gets divorced, why would it be harder??Aren't their older men who will find her age perfectly fine. I mean what 20 year old woman is going to marry a 50 year old man?? It's not like the 40 year old woman is going to marry a 25 or even 35 year old man, in most cases anyway. Or do older single men not exist. I'm sure they do, probably divorced too.

                Actually I know a couple who have grown children both divorced and are now married in their late 50s. I'm sure more exist. Especially if you're not interested in having children again, but want just companionship.
                you dream murderer

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by LaylaAb View Post
                  On another note.

                  Dont want to get off topic here or is this still on topic.

                  If a woman is in her early 40s, once she gets divorced, why would it be harder??Aren't their older men who will find her age perfectly fine. I mean what 20 year old woman is going to marry a 50 year old man?? It's not like the 40 year old woman is going to marry a 25 or even 35 year old man, in most cases anyway. Or do older single men not exist. I'm sure they do, probably divorced too.

                  Actually I know a couple who have grown children both divorced and are now married in their late 50s. I'm sure more exist. Especially if you're not interested in having children again, but want just companionship.
                  Well if he's 50 he'll probably have no problem with early 40s. But if the guy is also early 40s he'll probably prefer a woman in her 30s.

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                  • #10
                    After a long marriage, and then a divorce - why would anyone want to get married again?

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Indefinable View Post
                      After a long marriage, and then a divorce - why would anyone want to get married again?
                      I have been married for 17 years.

                      For many reasons. It could be that you like being married. Maybe you want a companion. Maybe you have strong desires and want to fill them in a halal way. Maybe the reason your first marriage failed was not your fault and your marriage was toxic and you want to try and have a healthy relationship.

                      Also, if you married young, like myself, when your children are done college, your only in your early 40s. So technically you're still young enough to try again.

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Indefinable View Post
                        After a long marriage, and then a divorce - why would anyone want to get married again?
                        thats a bit of a stupid q

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by tevejat View Post

                          thats a bit of a stupid q
                          (Random newbie - Ignore).

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by LaylaAb View Post

                            I have been married for 17 years.

                            For many reasons. It could be that you like being married. Maybe you want a companion. Maybe you have strong desires and want to fill them in a halal way. Maybe the reason your first marriage failed was not your fault and your marriage was toxic and you want to try and have a healthy relationship.

                            Also, if you married young, like myself, when your children are done college, your only in your early 40s. So technically you're still young enough to try again.
                            I didn't know this was about you specifically.

                            Anyhow - if someone has spent a long time with their spouse, and it was a toxic marriage as you say, then I would suggest spending some time alone and being at peace with yourself and focusing on your health before marrying again and having the responsibility of a spouse.

                            Years of toxic relationships can affect a person in ways they didn't even know.


                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Indefinable View Post

                              I didn't know this was about you specifically.

                              Anyhow - if someone has spent a long time with their spouse, and it was a toxic marriage as you say, then I would suggest spending some time alone and being at peace with yourself and focusing on your health before marrying again and having the responsibility of a spouse.

                              Years of toxic relationships can affect a person in ways they didn't even know.

                              It's not 100% really about me, just trying to put myself in that situation since I have been a long marriage. But, I agree about getting to know yourself first after a toxic relationship before moving on.

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