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How far does 'free mixing' in uni go???

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  • How far does 'free mixing' in uni go???

    This one really baffles me. Studying in a mixed environment at uni, how far can you really draw the line when it comes to interacting with the opposite sex?
    Would you say that practising brothers and sisters are more of a fitna than non muslim ones? Sometimes I have come across sisters who lower the gaze and not even say salam to a bro but then chat quite happily away with a non-muslim who may be in her group or a partner.

    Would you give your number to a guy if he was your study partner/ in your group, even though you could perfectly well communicate by email?

    'When I was four, I lost my father'
    Johaina Aamer, Age 9

  • #2
    Re: How far does 'free mixing' in uni go???

    Well i dont talk to boys in uni , but if the teacher makes us work in a group together, then ill only talk about the work etc n be polite but i wouldnt be too chatty with them. If a brother says salam, i dont reply, i just lower my gaze :)
    Yawmaithin tu’a A’radoona la takhfa minkum khafiyatun [69:18]
    :love:
    "Then which of the blessings of your Lord will you deny?" (Qur'an 55:13)

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    • #3
      Re: How far does 'free mixing' in uni go???

      free mixing does occur at uni no doubt although it may be seen as co-operatin etc.

      the question is
      is a muslim allowed to go uni as its a free-mixing environment. does shariah allow it.

      in the past during the prophets time did they learn in free-mixing environment.
      i know they did for islamic education. women at the back men at the front.
      :asta: :hidban::(
      Good Quran recitation site
      THE REAL VICTIMS OF TERRORISM

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      • #4
        Re: How far does 'free mixing' in uni go???

        Originally posted by Na'ima
        Well i dont talk to boys in uni , but if the teacher makes us work in a group together, then ill only talk about the work etc n be polite but i wouldnt be too chatty with them. If a brother says salam, i dont reply, i just lower my gaze :)
        I hope other sisters learn this from you :up:
        Saying of Mohammed (pbuh)
        "Reviling a Muslim is disobedience to Allah, & fighting with him is infidelity".

        Passion Of Christ (Eesa A.S) <--- check it out :banbear: :hidban: :banbear: :hidban: :banbear: :hidban:

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        • #5
          Re: How far does 'free mixing' in uni go???

          I wish many more muslimat wud be like you!




          Originally posted by Na'ima
          Well i dont talk to boys in uni , but if the teacher makes us work in a group together, then ill only talk about the work etc n be polite but i wouldnt be too chatty with them. If a brother says salam, i dont reply, i just lower my gaze :)
          :up:
          Please Re-update your Signature

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          • #6
            Re: How far does 'free mixing' in uni go???

            We are seprated here. No problem. I am a man, but doesn't it apply to both. Its not like guys can go and talk and chat. We have to lower our gaze too. When I was in America, I was known for my modesty alhumdeliallah. But don't think its only for women, men too.
            Please Re-update your Signature

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            • #7
              Re: How far does 'free mixing' in uni go???

              Originally posted by luqmanthecarpenter
              We are seprated here. No problem. I am a man, but doesn't it apply to both. Its not like guys can go and talk and chat. We have to lower our gaze too. When I was in America, I was known for my modesty alhumdeliallah. But don't think its only for women, men too.
              you are right about that akhi :up:
              Saying of Mohammed (pbuh)
              "Reviling a Muslim is disobedience to Allah, & fighting with him is infidelity".

              Passion Of Christ (Eesa A.S) <--- check it out :banbear: :hidban: :banbear: :hidban: :banbear: :hidban:

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: How far does 'free mixing' in uni go???

                Originally posted by Na'ima
                Well i dont talk to boys in uni , but if the teacher makes us work in a group together, then ill only talk about the work etc n be polite but i wouldnt be too chatty with them. If a brother says salam, i dont reply, i just lower my gaze :)

                Allhumdulilah you seem to have the balance right, but isnt it our obligation to return salaam?
                avatar from deviant art :)

                bring back PAGAL LADOOOO:up:

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                • #9
                  Re: How far does 'free mixing' in uni go???

                  Originally posted by Na'ima
                  Well i dont talk to boys in uni , but if the teacher makes us work in a group together, then ill only talk about the work etc n be polite but i wouldnt be too chatty with them. If a brother says salam, i dont reply, i just lower my gaze :)


                  I agree on what you say, but do you not find it hard to draw the line on being chatty? Its very hard to limit your conversation such that its strictly formal, but it is of course possible. ALhumdulillah I have never given my number to a guy, even though sometimes it would have really helped when some group work needs to be done, and sometimes it can somewhat suffer.

                  Would you say that thats a bit over the top? Because some people do and one sister I would regard practising once said to me, 'you might as well not come to uni if you will not talk to brothers.' But thats brothers- is it worse speaking to them than non muslim guys?
                  'When I was four, I lost my father'
                  Johaina Aamer, Age 9

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                  • #10
                    Re: How far does 'free mixing' in uni go???

                    Originally posted by Lu'Lu


                    'you might as well not come to uni if you will not talk to brothers.' But thats brothers- is it worse speaking to them than non muslim guys?
                    Yes:) That's all i have to say because it makes sense that way.
                    Please Re-update your Signature

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                    • #11
                      Re: How far does 'free mixing' in uni go???

                      Originally posted by Lu'Lu


                      I agree on what you say, but do you not find it hard to draw the line on being chatty? Its very hard to limit your conversation such that its strictly formal, but it is of course possible. ALhumdulillah I have never given my number to a guy, even though sometimes it would have really helped when some group work needs to be done, and sometimes it can somewhat suffer.

                      Would you say that thats a bit over the top? Because some people do and one sister I would regard practising once said to me, 'you might as well not come to uni if you will not talk to brothers.' But thats brothers- is it worse speaking to them than non muslim guys?
                      hey sorry for the LATE reply, but no i dont find it hard not talking to guys...and as regards to ur friend who said theres no point in coming to uni if u dont talk to boys, that is her opinion, at the end of the day ur at uni to do work, not to get all chatty with guys!! Its the same if u talk to muslim brothers and non muslim brothers in my opinion- there both boys at the end of the day.!!
                      Yawmaithin tu’a A’radoona la takhfa minkum khafiyatun [69:18]
                      :love:
                      "Then which of the blessings of your Lord will you deny?" (Qur'an 55:13)

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                      • #12
                        Re: How far does 'free mixing' in uni go???

                        the only time i talk to guys at university is when we have to do group work together, apart from that there isnt really a reason to talk to them.
                        Though has anybody else noticed how girls are so competitive in studies they dont really help u out when u need help, but guys r always willing to help (although some have other motives )
                        Some claim that u are like any one of us, But who can claim, to have visited the Arsh? We say bashr, but respect is also due. For mankind are like rocks, but a pearl are u. U travelled the 7Heavens, and ur eyes did not lie. For Jibril could not pass, but u, O Madani, glided by.

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                        • #13
                          Re: How far does 'free mixing' in uni go???

                          Talking socially to muslim men and non-muslim men has exactly the same rulings in Islam.... Giving your number out, whether for work purposes or not is not neccessary, and I'm sure email is adequate.

                          If you fear that, or you are, falling in to the trap of talking to men on a social level, or on a level that that is unislamic.....uni should be avoided or those men should be avoided!!! University is a big source of fitna for many young muslims, and sisters can pursue other options elsewhere if worse comes to worse....

                          MMS.....GOLDEN RULE: MEN ALWAYS HAVE ALTERIA MOTIVES!!!!
                          Last edited by Nawar; 19-03-06, 09:15 PM.

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                          • #14
                            Re: How far does 'free mixing' in uni go???

                            Originally posted by Nawar
                            Talking socially to muslim men and non-muslim men has exactly the same rulings in Islam.... Giving your number out, whether for work purposes or not is not neccessary, and I'm sure email is adequate.

                            If you fear that, or you are, falling in to the trap of talking to men on a social level, or on a level that that is unislamic.....uni should be avoided or those men should be avoided!!! University is a big source of fitna for many young muslims, and sisters can pursue other options elsewhere if worse comes to worse....

                            MMS.....GOLDEN RULE: MEN ALWAYS HAVE ALTERIA MOTIVES!!!!
                            yup i learnt that the hard way
                            Some claim that u are like any one of us, But who can claim, to have visited the Arsh? We say bashr, but respect is also due. For mankind are like rocks, but a pearl are u. U travelled the 7Heavens, and ur eyes did not lie. For Jibril could not pass, but u, O Madani, glided by.

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                            • #15
                              Re: How far does 'free mixing' in uni go???

                              Originally posted by Kaaju Barfi
                              I wish many more muslimat wud be like you!




                              :up:
                              awwwwwwwww
                              Yawmaithin tu’a A’radoona la takhfa minkum khafiyatun [69:18]
                              :love:
                              "Then which of the blessings of your Lord will you deny?" (Qur'an 55:13)

                              Comment

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