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"Probably Because Her Husband Made Her Wear it"

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  • "Probably Because Her Husband Made Her Wear it"

    Today I was on campus at the University I go to and there were young girls there selling girls' scout cookies. There were these 2 girls in particular walking with who I assume was their mother. They were probably about 8 or 9 years old, one of the girls ask their mother "Why is she wearing that on her head?" talking about my hijab of course, and her mother tells her "Probably because her husband made her wear it".

    It didn't make me very angry and it didn't reallt surprise me at all, but it's amazing how people still think this way and I'm just a little upset about the fact that she told her young daughter this. So of course this girl is gonna grow up thinking these things. But I defenitely do not wear hijab because my "husband made me wear it". I'm not even married :wacko:. And my father didn't make me wear it either. It was a decision I made on my own al7amdulillah, because Allah ta3ala commanded it and it is better for me in order to not attract sexual/negative attention from men and to preserve my chastity al7amdulillah. Anyway.... discuss.
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  • #2
    did you try to speak to her, sister?
    My toughest fight was with my first wife.

    Muhammad Ali Clay

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    • #3
      Originally posted by Al-Nasser
      did you try to speak to her, sister?
      :( No. Unfortunately I didn't have the guts (or the time) to say anything to her. Just passed right by her.
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      • #4
        it's ok, someday they'll get the message... :-)
        :up: :lailah: :up:

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        • #5
          i have been in the same situation.(im not married)people think the only reason i have changed the way i dress is because my dad makes me...my dad isnt strict at all,he has gave me the freedom to do wot i please(with limits ofcourse)but i dont misuse that freedom for the wrong reason.the surprising thing is the people more close to me started noticing and assuming the wrong.i neva take to heart wot people say to me so everyday i walk with my head held up high,jus to prove i dont care wot people say and i think you should have done the same!!!
          Originally posted by Ginan
          Today I was on campus at the University I go to and there were young girls there selling girls' scout cookies. There were these 2 girls in particular walking with who I assume was their mother. They were probably about 8 or 9 years old, one of the girls ask their mother "Why is she wearing that on her head?" talking about my hijab of course, and her mother tells her "Probably because her husband made her wear it".

          It didn't make me very angry and it didn't reallt surprise me at all, but it's amazing how people still think this way and I'm just a little upset about the fact that she told her young daughter this. So of course this girl is gonna grow up thinking these things. But I defenitely do not wear hijab because my "husband made me wear it". I'm not even married :wacko:. And my father didn't make me wear it either. It was a decision I made on my own al7amdulillah, because Allah ta3ala commanded it and it is better for me in order to not attract sexual/negative attention from men and to preserve my chastity al7amdulillah. Anyway.... discuss.
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          • #6
            Originally posted by babysara
            i have been in the same situation.(im not married)people think the only reason i have changed the way i dress is because my dad makes me...my dad isnt strict at all,he has gave me the freedom to do wot i please(with limits ofcourse)but i dont misuse that freedom for the wrong reason.the surprising thing is the people more close to me started noticing and assuming the wrong.i neva take to heart wot people say to me so everyday i walk with my head held up high,jus to prove i dont care wot people say and i think you should have done the same!!!
            I love the way our women proclaim that they do things out of choice whereas everyones thinks they are being forced...
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            • #7
              the way i have been brought up i have always done the choosing for myself...
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              • #8
                I definitely decided to wear hijab on my own. I even surprised my family and friends by doing it and there was never any pressure put on me to wear hijab (which is actually a little weird).

                babysara, I don't care either when people think that because I know it's not true. If it WERE true I would feel so oppressed, uncomfortable and stupid. I can make decisions for myself. I didn't even start wearing hijab until I turned 18.
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                • #9
                  Originally posted by moshyman
                  I love the way our women proclaim that they do things out of choice whereas everyones thinks they are being forced...
                  :eek2: What do you mean by this?
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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Ginan
                    :eek2: What do you mean by this?
                    I mean that it makes me happy to see sisters expressing their wills...
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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by moshyman
                      I mean that it makes me happy to see sisters expressing their wills...
                      Oh I see. It sounded like you thought we actually were forced but deny it. I apologize.
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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Ginan
                        I definitely decided to wear hijab on my own. I even surprised my family and friends by doing it and there was never any pressure put on me to wear hijab (which is actually a little weird).

                        babysara, I don't care either when people think that because I know it's not true. If it WERE true I would feel so oppressed, uncomfortable and stupid. I can make decisions for myself. I didn't even start wearing hijab until I turned 18.
                        Yeah I grew my beard through my own judgment and everybody was surprised because 2 of my older bros don't have beards. People seemed to think I was being weird for growing my beard before them. Indeed, many don't realise that I'm not being 'extra-religious', as having a beard is WAJIB.
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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Ginan
                          Oh I see. It sounded like you thought we actually were forced but deny it. I apologize.
                          Yeah I admit I did word the statement a bit funnily but it really does make me proud to see my sisters proclaiming their independent abilities to practice Islam
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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by moshyman
                            Indeed, many don't realise that I'm not being 'extra-religious', as having a beard is WAJIB.
                            :) Very true. Good for you akhi.
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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Ginan
                              :( No. Unfortunately I didn't have the guts (or the time) to say anything to her. Just passed right by her.
                              Ukhti did you know that da'wah is a fardh act? That was your opportunity to enlighten and dispel this myth, that we veil to please our hubbies who ever. I too, started wearing hijab around 4 years ago, much to the chagrin of my family then, and I still get the odd facetious comment [and that's from FAMILY!].

                              Learn from your 'mistake'. The next time someone makes such an ignorant comment, seize on that opportunity. As someone once said, opportunities multiply, as they're seized.

                              All it takes is for you to "implant" that seed, and who knows, one day it may germinate.

                              Mistakes are OK ukhti - so long as you learn from them.
                              If someone praises one of them (the believer), he says, "I know myself better than others [know me], and my Lord is more knowledgeable of me than myself. O Allah! Do not take me to task for what they say, and make me better than what they think of me, and forgive me for those sins which they are unaware of."

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