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Wife doesn't always eat halal. Wut do?

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  • Laraib_7866
    replied
    Originally posted by SeekingtheCreator View Post

    I really sense a manipulator. I would say look for someone else. Don't let your emotions get the better of you, think with your mind and not your heart.
    Thank you! Really needed this but as humans we sometimes think what if I can’t get anyone else but I’m praying etc so inshallah Allah will send the right person my way. Please keep me in your Duas too.

    Leave a comment:


  • Laraib_7866
    replied
    Originally posted by Ya'sin View Post


    ​​​​​Do you have any male family members? Such as a father, brother, or any other guardian?

    Men can take advantage of women, whatever your job, qualification, status, etc.

    He is a grown man. Eating Haram is a big deal. The vegan trend is in full swing so he could easily opt for a halal option if he is dying from starvation. There are halal alternatives available.

    A husband is supposed to be a guardian. We should look upto them, then our children will look upto them with respect too.

    How many times will you babysit him with Haram and halal. How long will he tolerate your warnings (it will be whinings for him) until he just dumps you.

    He meets you and suddenly he is enlightened. I wouldn't take his words so seriously, especially men that talk to women alone for marriage and don't even question if she has a wali or not.
    ​​
    These religious practises are a basic, especially for born Muslims and those that are serious about marriage. We are not talking about wanting an Alim or Mufti. All types of Muslims know about Haram meat and halal. Whether they take it seriously is another matter.


    He needs to be upfront, if he doesn't care then that's fine because it will save you both from wasting time. There are muslim women who don't care about halal Haram so he can get married to them.

    If he does care, you will need to be very careful because how do you know he is committed.

    He shouldn't be doing it for a practicing lady. He should be doing it because he cares about his religion.

    That's what serious people find attractive.

    If you have a wali, please for the sake of not being taken for a ride, involve him. Our walis are there for a reason and we need use them and remind them about their job.

    I'm guessing you most likely don't have a wali, then you will have to tell this person that this is a big concern for you and tell him you need time to make a decision.

    If he starts messaging with dumb love jargon, I would be weary. In the meantime, you should pray isthikarah.
    See how he behaves.

    Also, don't be so vulnerable and needy because that is what some men love to manipulate and make you feel guilty.

    I don't know this man, but we all know a good man, who is looking into marriage will be serious about eating Haram.
    Jazakallah thank you so much. Honestly you said what was in my mind that he wasn’t starving etc and I took the right decision. Thank you honestly means a lot! I broke things off upon hearing his actions and felt that it was a big deal for me. I am a doctor by profession and also started an alimah course this year myself as I want to gain knowledge of the religion because after gaining secular studies I feel that spending 6 years to get two initials “dr” is great for the “respect etc” of this world but the religion actually teaches you the real purpose of life. I honestly thank you from the bottom of my heart because this is the thing I needed to hear from an elder male figure. It reaffirmed that my decision was right and Inshallah there will be better out there for me. Just please keep me in your duas too. Thank you so much really.
    Last edited by Laraib_7866; 09-02-20, 09:21 AM.

    Leave a comment:


  • Abu 'Abdullaah
    replied
    Originally posted by eesa the kiwi View Post

    I really dont have the knowledge to comment but there are some senior ulema upon the sunnah who have issued this ruling

    Personally I disagree and don't eat the meat but this issue is not so black and white
    The ruling erroneously assumes that the people slaughtering in the west are ahlul kitaab.

    Leave a comment:


  • SeekingtheCreator
    replied
    Originally posted by Laraib_7866 View Post

    So do you think I did the right thing breaking things off?
    I really sense a manipulator. I would say look for someone else. Don't let your emotions get the better of you, think with your mind and not your heart.

    Leave a comment:


  • Alyssian
    replied
    Hey
    you should have checked this things before marriage, seriously!
    but now you should convince her your way






    Kodi Lucky Patcher nox

    Leave a comment:


  • Ya'sin
    replied
    Originally posted by Ya'sin View Post
    Re: Wife wants to eat noodle that has beef broth in it. Told her she shouldn't. She w

    Chuck it in the bin

    She can make in beef broth

    Throw in a couple of bones in a saucepan, add some spices, let it boil and voila

    :zzz:

    Halal and wholesome
    ^ me

    2017 :crying2: :nonono:

    Leave a comment:


  • Ya'sin
    replied
    Originally posted by Laraib_7866 View Post
    Salaam everyone. I’m new to this site and found this thread but not sure to start another for my own issue as it’s similar to the OP of this thread. I met a Muslim man recently for marriage but now since talking I found out that he just enters KFC and other places and eats the chicken, which in America is not certified halal. I did say to him that it’s not on and I wouldn’t want to marry someone who does this as I feel how would I raise my kids if he cuts corners in religion. Now he said since he was talking to me he hasn’t had it as he saw I was a practicing lady but just recently when he was going on vacation then he ate mcdonalds at the airport so am I right in just ending things here and not tolerating such behaviour? Part of me says I seem to have dodged a bullet by saying we are not compatible but another part says that maybe if I had gave him a chance he would have maybe changed. Any ideas everyone please

    ​​​​​Do you have any male family members? Such as a father, brother, or any other guardian?

    Men can take advantage of women, whatever your job, qualification, status, etc.

    He is a grown man. Eating Haram is a big deal. The vegan trend is in full swing so he could easily opt for a halal option if he is dying from starvation. There are halal alternatives available.

    A husband is supposed to be a guardian. We should look upto them, then our children will look upto them with respect too.

    How many times will you babysit him with Haram and halal. How long will he tolerate your warnings (it will be whinings for him) until he just dumps you.

    He meets you and suddenly he is enlightened. I wouldn't take his words so seriously, especially men that talk to women alone for marriage and don't even question if she has a wali or not.
    ​​
    These religious practises are a basic, especially for born Muslims and those that are serious about marriage. We are not talking about wanting an Alim or Mufti. All types of Muslims know about Haram meat and halal. Whether they take it seriously is another matter.


    He needs to be upfront, if he doesn't care then that's fine because it will save you both from wasting time. There are muslim women who don't care about halal Haram so he can get married to them.

    If he does care, you will need to be very careful because how do you know he is committed.

    He shouldn't be doing it for a practicing lady. He should be doing it because he cares about his religion.

    That's what serious people find attractive.

    If you have a wali, please for the sake of not being taken for a ride, involve him. Our walis are there for a reason and we need use them and remind them about their job.

    I'm guessing you most likely don't have a wali, then you will have to tell this person that this is a big concern for you and tell him you need time to make a decision.

    If he starts messaging with dumb love jargon, I would be weary. In the meantime, you should pray isthikarah.
    See how he behaves.

    Also, don't be so vulnerable and needy because that is what some men love to manipulate and make you feel guilty.

    I don't know this man, but we all know a good man, who is looking into marriage will be serious about eating Haram.

    Last edited by Ya'sin; 08-02-20, 05:26 PM.

    Leave a comment:


  • eesa the kiwi
    replied
    Originally posted by Abu 'Abdullaah View Post
    I'm not sure it is valid.
    I wasnt really clear in what I meant

    I wasn't trying to say the opinion is correct but that this difference of opinion we should have respect towards those who have made their ijtihad

    Leave a comment:


  • eesa the kiwi
    replied
    Originally posted by Laraib_7866 View Post

    Could you post what you think because I’m unsure and came here for advise please.
    I would advise looking into other areas of his deen to see if hes deficient

    Leave a comment:


  • Laraib_7866
    replied
    Originally posted by Abu 'Abdullaah View Post
    I'm not sure it is valid.
    So do you think I did the right thing breaking things off?

    Leave a comment:


  • eesa the kiwi
    replied
    Originally posted by Abu 'Abdullaah View Post
    I'm not sure it is valid.
    I really dont have the knowledge to comment but there are some senior ulema upon the sunnah who have issued this ruling

    Personally I disagree and don't eat the meat but this issue is not so black and white

    Leave a comment:


  • Laraib_7866
    replied
    Originally posted by eesa the kiwi View Post

    Wa alaikum Salam wa rahmatullah wa barakatu

    While personally I dont agree with the particular ruling there is a valid difference of opinion regarding wether meat in the west qualified as the meat of ahlul kitab

    As for breaking things off I really don't know what to advise so I'll refrain from posting my opinion
    Could you post what you think because I’m unsure and came here for advise please.

    Leave a comment:


  • Abu 'Abdullaah
    replied
    Originally posted by eesa the kiwi View Post
    ...there is a valid difference of opinion regarding wether meat in the west qualified as the meat of ahlul kitab...
    I'm not sure it is valid.

    Leave a comment:


  • eesa the kiwi
    replied
    Originally posted by Laraib_7866 View Post
    Salaam everyone. I’m new to this site and found this thread but not sure to start another for my own issue as it’s similar to the OP of this thread. I met a Muslim man recently for marriage but now since talking I found out that he just enters KFC and other places and eats the chicken, which in America is not certified halal. I did say to him that it’s not on and I wouldn’t want to marry someone who does this as I feel how would I raise my kids if he cuts corners in religion. Now he said since he was talking to me he hasn’t had it as he saw I was a practicing lady but just recently when he was going on vacation then he ate mcdonalds at the airport so am I right in just ending things here and not tolerating such behaviour? Part of me says I seem to have dodged a bullet by saying we are not compatible but another part says that maybe if I had gave him a chance he would have maybe changed. Any ideas everyone please
    Wa alaikum Salam wa rahmatullah wa barakatu

    While personally I dont agree with the particular ruling there is a valid difference of opinion regarding wether meat in the west qualified as the meat of ahlul kitab

    As for breaking things off I really don't know what to advise so I'll refrain from posting my opinion

    Leave a comment:


  • Laraib_7866
    replied
    Salaam everyone. I’m new to this site and found this thread but not sure to start another for my own issue as it’s similar to the OP of this thread. I met a Muslim man recently for marriage but now since talking I found out that he just enters KFC and other places and eats the chicken, which in America is not certified halal. I did say to him that it’s not on and I wouldn’t want to marry someone who does this as I feel how would I raise my kids if he cuts corners in religion. Now he said since he was talking to me he hasn’t had it as he saw I was a practicing lady but just recently when he was going on vacation then he ate mcdonalds at the airport so am I right in just ending things here and not tolerating such behaviour? Part of me says I seem to have dodged a bullet by saying we are not compatible but another part says that maybe if I had gave him a chance he would have maybe changed. Any ideas everyone please

    Leave a comment:

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