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  • Dealing with completely non religious family

    How do I deal with my family (parents) who don't even fast in Ramadan nor pray

    Honestly, what's the best way to deal with parents who are so far from the deen that they don't even know al Fatiha?

    Someone advise me, I feel sick when I think of where my family are heading
    https://islamicgemsandpearls.wordpress.com

  • #2
    Re: Dealing with completely non religious family

    Make dua'a to Allah that he guides them, and you continue practicing Islam. Don't hide when you do Salah, it may inspire them to start praying. Try talking to them about Islam, but don't argue with them. My mom didn't pray for many years, and I when I got more religious I started to pray, and then made dua'a that she does too, and she did. Allah guides whom He will, so don't let you familys misguidance bring you down, but at the same time, keep to your Islam, and keep to your dua'a. Also, make sure to eat only halal food as well, because first, we are required to eat religiously slaughtered animals, secondly, non-halal slaughtered animals suffer when they're killed, and thirdly, when we eat haram, our dua'a wont be accepted: https://islamqa.info/en/10191

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    • #3
      Re: Dealing with completely non religious family

      Jazakallah khayr

      I don't live with them but if I am there & pray salaah I do not hide it. I've been practising Islam since my teenage years and it's been almost ten years alhumdulillah but it hasn't encouraged anyone yet to start practising. I make dua every day for them. It can be hard at times as it is them against me and sometimes they encourage me to do bad things but I've been strong so far, alhumdulilah
      https://islamicgemsandpearls.wordpress.com

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      • #4
        Re: Dealing with completely non religious family

        Originally posted by Layla_ View Post
        How do I deal with my family (parents) who don't even fast in Ramadan nor pray

        Honestly, what's the best way to deal with parents who are so far from the deen that they don't even know al Fatiha?

        Someone advise me, I feel sick when I think of where my family are heading
        To be a bit blunt. What is different between your parents and a non-Muslim? The shahadah they might not even know how to pronounce, nor do they implement it at all in their lives?

        It is not enough to state your belief without action and still expect to be raised up with the believers on the day of judgement,
        the kalimah has conditions, without these it's deficient or absent.

        So if it was me I'd start off with basic Da'wah, same as a revert must do with their parents. feed them little morsels, tell them the odd ayat or hadith is relevant to the conversation without trying to force the conversation.

        Then move from there into more active Da'wah, ask them where they think they will go when they die?
        ask them if they believe? and if so what do they think Allah will think of someone who refuses to do even the smallest acts of ibada?
        FOLLOW THE NEW BLOG - GINGERBEARDMAN - Muslim, father, husband, writer, defender of ginger rights!

        www.facebook.com/outreach4Islam - Outreach4Islam have been working together in Leicester, calling the not yet Muslims to Islam since 2006.

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        • #5
          Re: Dealing with completely non religious family

          Originally posted by Layla_ View Post
          How do I deal with my family (parents) who don't even fast in Ramadan nor prayHonestly, what's the best way to deal with parents who are so far from the deen that they don't even know al Fatiha? Someone advise me, I feel sick when I think of where my family are heading
          If you are able to live with them its better. So that everyday they see you practising , it has quite the effect on them. For now , since its only once in a while that you are there then they don't really see as much. But we may never know , since if Allah wants to give hidayah, its an easy matter Perhaps sending text islamic reminders, those graphic short messages may help. So you can keep on sending, if its not awkward for you. Buy islamic gifts etc for them.The target and aim is also to make them think and reflect that they are not practising the deen. And make du'a. Allah
          says in the Quran Surah An-Nahl : 125
          Invite to the way of your Lord with wisdom and good instruction, and argue with them in a way that is best. Indeed, your Lord is most knowing of who has strayed from His way, and He is most knowing of who is [rightly] guided.

          taken from https://quran.com/16/125I find this ayat is really relevant. May Allah help you inshaAllah.
          Allah Subḥānahu wa-taʿālā has mentioned in the Quran in chapter Surah Al-Ahzab:21 There has certainly been for you in the Messenger of Allah an excellent pattern for anyone whose hope is in Allah and the Last Day and [who] remembers Allah often.

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          • #6
            Re: Dealing with completely non religious family

            Originally posted by Gingerbeardman View Post
            To be a bit blunt. What is different between your parents and a non-Muslim? The shahadah they might not even know how to pronounce, nor do they implement it at all in their lives?

            It is not enough to state your belief without action and still expect to be raised up with the believers on the day of judgement,
            the kalimah has conditions, without these it's deficient or absent.

            So if it was me I'd start off with basic Da'wah, same as a revert must do with their parents. feed them little morsels, tell them the odd ayat or hadith is relevant to the conversation without trying to force the conversation.

            Then move from there into more active Da'wah, ask them where they think they will go when they die?
            ask them if they believe? and if so what do they think Allah will think of someone who refuses to do even the smallest acts of ibada?
            Yes there's no difference between them and non believers and I also consider myself a revert as I was taught zilch about the deen by my parents. I have asked my dad if he's a Muslim because of some of the things he does and he just said what kind of a question is that.

            I have given them Dawah whilst being careful to not force Islam onto them but they don't listen

            Last week I stayed at my mums house it was an odd night of Ramadan & she kept putting on movies for me to watch. I told her numerous times its Ramadan can you please pray and told her about the importance of Ramadan and esp the last ten nights but wallahi she wasn't listening she was busy scrolling on daily mail on her phone. Sometimes I feel I can get to my mum but not at all times but with my dad I can never get to him
            https://islamicgemsandpearls.wordpress.com

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            • #7
              Re: Dealing with completely non religious family

              Originally posted by MuslimThinker View Post
              If you are able to live with them its better. So that everyday they see you practising , it has quite the effect on them. For now , since its only once in a while that you are there then they don't really see as much. But we may never know , since if Allah wants to give hidayah, its an easy matter Perhaps sending text islamic reminders, those graphic short messages may help. So you can keep on sending, if its not awkward for you. Buy islamic gifts etc for them.The target and aim is also to make them think and reflect that they are not practising the deen. And make du'a. Allah
              says in the Quran Surah An-Nahl : 125
              Invite to the way of your Lord with wisdom and good instruction, and argue with them in a way that is best. Indeed, your Lord is most knowing of who has strayed from His way, and He is most knowing of who is [rightly] guided.

              taken from https://quran.com/16/125I find this ayat is really relevant. May Allah help you inshaAllah.
              No when I was living with them they made my life hell I wouldn't put myself through that again.
              https://islamicgemsandpearls.wordpress.com

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              • #8
                Re: Dealing with completely non religious family

                You cant really do anything more than what you already done, its up to them whether they will pray or not.

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                • #9
                  Re: Dealing with completely non religious family

                  Originally posted by Truthseeker18 View Post
                  You cant really do anything more than what you already done, its up to them whether they will pray or not.
                  Yeah true I guess I must continue with the dua & it in Allah's Hands
                  https://islamicgemsandpearls.wordpress.com

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                  • #10
                    Re: Dealing with completely non religious family

                    Originally posted by Layla_ View Post
                    Yes there's no difference between them and non believers and I also consider myself a revert as I was taught zilch about the deen by my parents. I have asked my dad if he's a Muslim because of some of the things he does and he just said what kind of a question is that.

                    I have given them Dawah whilst being careful to not force Islam onto them but they don't listen

                    Last week I stayed at my mums house it was an odd night of Ramadan & she kept putting on movies for me to watch. I told her numerous times its Ramadan can you please pray and told her about the importance of Ramadan and esp the last ten nights but wallahi she wasn't listening she was busy scrolling on daily mail on her phone. Sometimes I feel I can get to my mum but not at all times but with my dad I can never get to him
                    Dawah to your own family members is sometimes the hardest to do, something I certainly understand and the Quran has enough stories of the anbiya and righteous being tested by Allah through their parents, children, spouses etc.
                    FOLLOW THE NEW BLOG - GINGERBEARDMAN - Muslim, father, husband, writer, defender of ginger rights!

                    www.facebook.com/outreach4Islam - Outreach4Islam have been working together in Leicester, calling the not yet Muslims to Islam since 2006.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Dealing with completely non religious family

                      Originally posted by Gingerbeardman View Post
                      Dawah to your own family members is sometimes the hardest to do, something I certainly understand and the Quran has enough stories of the anbiya and righteous being tested by Allah through their parents, children, spouses etc.
                      True. I keep thinking of rasulullah peace be upon him & his uncle but I guess whilst I'm still living I will continue to give them Dawah Insha Allah
                      https://islamicgemsandpearls.wordpress.com

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