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Women are the biggest fitna for men, but what is the biggest fitna for women?

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  • Re: Women are the biggest fitna for men, but what is the biggest fitna for women?

    Originally posted by Rumaysah~ View Post
    The question itself is wrong and coming from a wrong place. Why do we have to have a 'biggest fitnah' just because men do? Why are women always putting themselves alongside men?

    We don't have one main thing is a fitnah for us all, women are all very different and complicated, not as simple as men. Women are always going through changes (physically and emotionally) and phases where different things become the biggest fitnah for them.
    The answer to the question is Chocolate.

    Comment


    • Re: Women are the biggest fitna for men, but what is the biggest fitna for women?

      Originally posted by zi-zizou View Post
      The answer to the question is Chocolate.
      It's not, as much as I love chocolate. There will be days where I will hate anyone who buys me it.
      Some women don't want chocolate at all.
      شَكَوْتُ إلَى وَكِيعٍ سُوءَ حِفْظِي
      فَأرْشَدَنِي إلَى تَرْكِ المعَاصي
      وَأخْبَرَنِي بأَنَّ العِلْمَ نُورٌ
      ونورُ الله لا يهدى لعاصي

      Comment


      • Re: Women are the biggest fitna for men, but what is the biggest fitna for women?

        Originally posted by Rumaysah~ View Post
        The question itself is wrong and coming from a wrong place. Why do we have to have a 'biggest fitnah' just because men do? Why are women always putting themselves alongside men?

        We don't have one main thing is a fitnah for us all, women are all very different and complicated, not as simple as men. Women are always going through changes (physically and emotionally) and phases where different things become the biggest fitnah for them.

        Last week it was one thing, this week it's something completely different. A month from now only Allah knows what it will be.
        I feel one way now, I feel another way a few hours from now. It frustrates even me sometimes but that's just how it is.
        I don't agree with that stereotype. Men are equally complicated. They just hide their emotions better.

        Comment


        • Re: Women are the biggest fitna for men, but what is the biggest fitna for women?

          Originally posted by Rumaysah~ View Post
          It's not, as much as I love chocolate. There will be days where I will hate anyone who buys me it.
          Some women don't want chocolate at all.
          *mind blown*

          Comment


          • Re: Women are the biggest fitna for men, but what is the biggest fitna for women?

            Originally posted by lonelyniqabi View Post
            I don't agree with that stereotype. Men are equally complicated. They just hide their emotions better.
            I'm not so sure...give me some aluminium foil and put it in some sunlight so it twinkles and I'll stare at it for hours. No wait start a little fire and I'll stare at it for days.

            Comment


            • Re: Women are the biggest fitna for men, but what is the biggest fitna for women?

              Originally posted by Rumaysah~ View Post
              It's not, as much as I love chocolate. There will be days where I will hate anyone who buys me it.
              Some women don't want chocolate at all.
              Everyone is obsessed with chocolate. I must really be weird cause I don't care for it too much unless it's some good white chocolate. I do like chocolate cakes, icecream etc.
              Indeed we belong to Allah,
              and indeed to Him we will return.


              Quran 2:156

              Comment


              • Re: Women are the biggest fitna for men, but what is the biggest fitna for women?

                Originally posted by lonelyniqabi View Post
                I don't agree with that stereotype. Men are equally complicated. They just hide their emotions better.
                Sis i'm not talking about emotions alone, all humans have emotions whether they express them freely or not.
                Women just don't think like men, we are influenced by a lot of things and we change too much, women don't stay in one place, they are carried by their own feelings in the moment which makes them more complicated whereas men are more stable in how they think and make decisions.

                The two genders are completely different. The hadith says that women are the biggest fitnah for men so that means it's something all men share.
                There's nothing all women share to the level that all men share like their weakness for women.
                شَكَوْتُ إلَى وَكِيعٍ سُوءَ حِفْظِي
                فَأرْشَدَنِي إلَى تَرْكِ المعَاصي
                وَأخْبَرَنِي بأَنَّ العِلْمَ نُورٌ
                ونورُ الله لا يهدى لعاصي

                Comment


                • Re: Women are the biggest fitna for men, but what is the biggest fitna for women?

                  Originally posted by Rumaysah~ View Post
                  Sis i'm not talking about emotions alone, all humans have emotions whether they express them freely or not.
                  Women just don't think like men, we are influenced by a lot of things and we change too much, women don't stay in one place, they are carried by their own feelings in the moment which makes them more complicated whereas men are more stable in how they think and make decisions.

                  The two genders are completely different. The hadith says that women are the biggest fitnah for men so that means it's something all men share.
                  There's nothing all women share to the level that all men share like their weakness for women.
                  No, the entire female species aren't a bunch of fickle, irrational, emotional mess. I resent that stereotype because a) I can't relate to them and b) men can also be all of that and more.

                  Maybe you're right that there isn't a single "biggest" fitnah that apply to all women. But each of us also aren't a special snowflake. There are certain things that can be considered a fitnah for the majority, as we can see from the responses above.

                  Comment


                  • Re: Women are the biggest fitna for men, but what is the biggest fitna for women?

                    Originally posted by lonelyniqabi View Post
                    No, the entire female species aren't a bunch of fickle, irrational, emotional mess. I resent that stereotype because a) I can't relate to them and b) men can also be all of that and more.

                    Maybe you're right that there isn't a single "biggest" fitnah that apply to all women. But each of us also aren't a special snowflake. There are certain things that can be considered a fitnah for the majority, as we can see from the responses above.
                    Lolll -sigh (agree)
                    Indeed we belong to Allah,
                    and indeed to Him we will return.


                    Quran 2:156

                    Comment


                    • Re: Women are the biggest fitna for men, but what is the biggest fitna for women?

                      Originally posted by lonelyniqabi View Post
                      No, the entire female species aren't a bunch of fickle, irrational, emotional mess. I resent that stereotype because a) I can't relate to them and b) men can also be all of that and more.

                      Maybe you're right that there isn't a single "biggest" fitnah that apply to all women. But each of us also aren't a special snowflake. There are certain things that can be considered a fitnah for the majority, as we can see from the responses above.
                      I didn't say any of that, you interpreted it that way. Being driven by emotion or being emotional has nothing to do with being an emotional mess. No one should be an emotional mess, man or woman. Emotions are not a bad thing so let's not paint them that way. Majority of women are more emotional and use that to make decisions or express that more openly, it's not a stereotype just because you don't relate and just because some men are also like that.

                      My entire original point was that we are all very different. The fact that no one here can agree on the one biggest fitnah for women but men can all agree on theirs proves that.
                      And that's exactly what I said, if something is fitnah for the majority of women it's not the same as women being the biggest fitnah for men. Why are sisters even comparing themselves to men like that? Doesn't make any sense to me.
                      شَكَوْتُ إلَى وَكِيعٍ سُوءَ حِفْظِي
                      فَأرْشَدَنِي إلَى تَرْكِ المعَاصي
                      وَأخْبَرَنِي بأَنَّ العِلْمَ نُورٌ
                      ونورُ الله لا يهدى لعاصي

                      Comment


                      • Re: Women are the biggest fitna for men, but what is the biggest fitna for women?

                        Originally posted by Rumaysah~ View Post
                        I didn't say any of that, you interpreted it that way. Being driven by emotion or being emotional has nothing to do with being an emotional mess. No one should be an emotional mess, man or woman. Emotions are not a bad thing so let's not paint them that way. Majority of women are more emotional and use that to make decisions or express that more openly, it's not a stereotype just because you don't relate and just because some men are also like that.

                        My entire original point was that we are all very different. The fact that no one here can agree on the one biggest fitnah for women but men can all agree on theirs proves that.
                        And that's exactly what I said, if something is fitnah for the majority of women it's not the same as women being the biggest fitnah for men. Why are sisters even comparing themselves to men like that? Doesn't make any sense to me.
                        I didn't misinterpret. This is what you said.

                        we are influenced by a lot of things and we change too much,
                        Easily influenced = Illogical. Change too much = Fickle.

                        women don't stay in one place, they are carried by their own feelings in the moment
                        Emotionally unstable.


                        If you had used the word "I" in all those sentences, then it would've been fine. But please don't pigeon-hole all women with the same characteristics. That's what I dislike immensely; generalization. Please don't say women are like this, men are like that, Asians are like this, Arabs are like that. You're one person. You don't speak for your entire race or species.

                        If you acknowledge that "we're all very different", then by the same token, you can't put all of us in the same box.

                        Emotions are neither a strength nor a weakness. It can be either depending on your reactions. If you let your emotions affect your behaviour negatively, then it's a weakness. If you channel them positively, then it becomes a strength.


                        P.S: Please don't see my comments as a personal attack, or feel like I'm being unnecessarily harsh towards you. I know you're a cool gal and أحبك في الله :)

                        Comment


                        • Re: Women are the biggest fitna for men, but what is the biggest fitna for women?

                          Originally posted by Rumaysah~ View Post
                          The question itself is wrong and coming from a wrong place. Why do we have to have a 'biggest fitnah' just because men do? Why are women always putting themselves alongside men?

                          We don't have one main thing is a fitnah for us all, women are all very different and complicated, not as simple as men. Women are always going through changes (physically and emotionally) and phases where different things become the biggest fitnah for them.

                          Last week it was one thing, this week it's something completely different. A month from now only Allah knows what it will be.
                          I feel one way now, I feel another way a few hours from now. It frustrates even me sometimes but that's just how it is.
                          Hmm,

                          I thought it was a pretty valid question. It wasn't from a place of comparing men to women, twas just a thought that popped in my head so I decided to make a thread about it to see what other's thought as well.

                          Truthfully, I was hoping for more of a discussion and critical thinking, but only a few did that. We're quick to mention the superficial, like shopping, chocolate, etc.... but we've only scratched the surface here.
                          وَإِذَا سَأَلَكَ عِبَادِي عَنِّي فَإِنِّي قَرِيبٌ أُجِيبُ دَعْوَةَ الدَّاعِ إِذَا دَعَانِ فَلْيَسْتَجِيبُواْ لِي وَلْيُؤْمِنُواْ بِي لَعَلَّهُمْ يَرْشُدُونَ
                          "And when My servants ask you (O Muhammad concerning Me, then answer them), I am indeed near (to them by My knowledge). I respond to the invocations of the supplicant when he calls on Me (without any mediator or intercessor). So let them obey Me and believe in Me, so that they may be led aright."
                          Surah al-Baqarah ayah 186
                          [2:186]

                          .:.
                          .:. Perfer et Obdura : Dolor Hic Tibi Proderit Olim .:.
                          Be patient and strong : someday this pain will be useful to you

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