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Are South Asians really embarrassed of their origins?

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  • #16
    Re: Are South Asians really embarrassed of their origins?

    How many generations does it take to not be Desi anymore?

    Some are the 3rd generation from their grandparents born in India. Is it just down to skin colour? I was born in UK, my mother was born in Canada, and her grandparents Russian. I certainly do not consider my culture to be Canadian or Russian at all. So why does it make a difference just if your skin colour is brown - your parents or grandparents land becomes "your culture" simply be default?

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    • #17
      Re: Are South Asians really embarrassed of their origins?

      Originally posted by Morose View Post
      Oh trust me, Pakistanis have this issue too. Either they want to be western, or they want to be Arab.

      Why though? What is wrong with your own culture? Just be honest of where you are from. Nothing wrong with being a Ben-Beng.
      Pakistanis aren't like that. We tend to say where we're from back home but if you ask a Pakistani where he or she is from and if they born in uk they'll say city they live in. Which is totally normal. The question is ambiguous as where are you from doesn't mean in the country your parents are from. I wouldn't say I'm from azad kashmir as I wasn't born there but would say I'm from the uk as I was born here doesn't mean I'm hiding my identity as someone of pakistani origin and I'm certainly not embarrassed about being Pakistani
      Last edited by Sis_Asiya; 16-01-17, 12:45 AM.
      82. Verily, when He intends a thing, His Command is, "be", and it is! 83. So glory to Him in Whose hands is the dominion of all things: and to Him will you be all brought back. Quran surah 36: Ya-sin

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      • #18
        Re: Are South Asians really embarrassed of their origins?

        Hmmm, I don't see the issue here. If someone asks what are you or where are you from, I say California *shrugs*. If they dig, but no like where are you from, like your family. I just say oh we've been here for a long time or, oh I'm a mixed person. I don't get into details about it. The only time I talk in detail is if there is a conversation about geneology, which I find interesting, but that's a rare conversation. Asians or anyone else don't need to elaborate. If you're British, well you're British. Meh.

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        • #19
          Re: Are South Asians really embarrassed of their origins?

          when people ask where I'm from, i tell them my parents are from Bdesh, not because i'm embarassed or anything, but because i wasn't born there.
          لآ اِلَهَ اِلّا اللّهُ مُحَمَّدٌ رَسُوُل اللّهِ

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          • #20
            Re: Are South Asians really embarrassed of their origins?

            Cool. This is what I like to see, proud south Asians. I just wish the ones in real life could be like you guys. None of that self-loathing.

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            • #21
              Re: Are South Asians really embarrassed of their origins?

              I don't think its anything to do with being embarassed about what you're from,irrespective of what your answer is.
              It's just an ambigious question and when someone asks, I don't know if they're asking where I was born, or where my parents are from.
              I've never been India, and none of my family even live there now, we are indian but my parents were born in kenya so a lot more fam in kenya so I would want to visit there over india with no relatives. So that's another thing
              I normally say I was born here but I am indian.
              And what else should I say.. I am proud of being indian but ive never been there and we are not cultural. I cant say my parents were born there, as they weren't.
              Plus when I have said india in the past I have always been asked further qs and more often than not its wanting to know where I am born.. as apparently my accent sounds scottish to some.. london to others.. etc lol and I'm from neither.
              Also when I say im indian I have been asked whether im muslim lol even though I wear scarf and abayah
              ppl assume im pakistani or arab without asking me. No I'm a british indian. How can I just say indian.. I dont know anything about it, and ive lived here all my life. Its part of who I am.. both elements
              And with Him are the keys of the Ghayb (all that is hidden), none knows them but He. And He knows whatever there is in the land and in the sea; not a leaf falls, but He knows it. There is not a grain in the darkness of the earth nor anything fresh or dry, but is written in a Clear Record”
              [al-An’aam 6:59]

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              • #22
                Re: Are South Asians really embarrassed of their origins?

                Not really a question of being embarrassed.
                If you were born and brought up here, lived all your life here, and you don't feel much connection at all to Bangladesh, why would you say, "I'm from Bangladesh"?

                I reply that I am from Bangladesh, though I'm not sure why. If anything, in a way it would make more sense for me to say I'm English/British, etc.

                Parents, language and food are Bangladeshi
                Education, upbringing and also language is English.

                I feel like I'm neither, tbh. Alhamdulillah, I guess that's a good thing. I'm just Muslim. Maybe an Engladeshi Muslim. :]
                LAA ILAAHA ILLALLAH
                -------------------------------
                "And if you would count the graces of God, never could you be able to count them. Truly, God is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful." (Qur'aan 16:18)
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                • #23
                  Re: Are South Asians really embarrassed of their origins?

                  :salams

                  My family are from Wales but I was born in England so I would never say I'm Welsh, because I'm clearly not, (country wise) I'm from England. All of my family are Welsh, speak Welsh and are proud to be Welsh but myself and my siblings were all born in England. I say my family are Welsh.

                  Am I ethnically Welsh? Not even that I don't think as I didn't grow up there, though I did have all the influences of language and culture around me, I still don't feel it or think that way.

                  I'm not Welsh simply because my parents are Welsh.

                  I'm English. It's to do with where you're born and the culture you actually grew up in so I have no idea why there is an assumption of embarrassment when someone says they're English/British and only their family come from South Asia.
                  Last edited by Rifqah; 16-01-17, 07:50 AM.

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                  • #24
                    Re: Are South Asians really embarrassed of their origins?

                    I'm the poster girl for being Pakistani but I always say 'my family is from pakistan'

                    Like others have said, it's an ambiguous question because everyone assumes brown people were born elsewhere
                    Allah gave us two ears and one mouth, so we can listen more and talk less.

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                    • #25
                      Re: Are South Asians really embarrassed of their origins?

                      Used to be the case, these days I've met plenty of somalis just the same. Remember the indo-pak families have for the most part been here much longer and had the kuffar working on them for a greater period of time both during and 'post' colonialism.
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                      • #26
                        Are South Asians really embarrassed of their origins?

                        My morals, values and everything arises from religion first and then culture. Culture exists and it will forever be, our food, our clothes etc (only if it doesn't tamper with our islam)

                        I just happen to be born in U.K. it is merely my country of birth. I wouldn't say oh I'm from UK and do I look white, ofcourse not...

                        Bangladeshi is always my first answer. history was always spoken about, experience, morals, things that I will too tell my children.

                        Despite living here now this village mindset will forever stay in my heart and mind. In Sha Allah.

                        Anyway that's enough of this.....

                        We're not embarrassed so please do not say that. Alhamdulilah I have embraced my culture and disregard the things that Islam does not permit.

                        :) basssss.
                        إقراء القران فإنه يأتي يوم القيامة شفيعا لأصحابه

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                        • #27
                          Are South Asians really embarrassed of their origins?

                          And it makes me laugh when Bengalis don't call themselves Bengalis and say they're English, duro fagol! Coconut.
                          إقراء القران فإنه يأتي يوم القيامة شفيعا لأصحابه

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                          • #28
                            Re: Are South Asians really embarrassed of their origins?

                            Originally posted by Rifqah View Post
                            :salams

                            My family are from Wales but I was born in England so I would never say I'm Welsh, because I'm clearly not, (country wise) I'm from England. All of my family are Welsh, speak Welsh and are proud to be Welsh but myself and my siblings were all born in England. I say my family are Welsh.

                            Am I ethnically Welsh? Not even that I don't think as I didn't grow up there, though I did have all the influences of language and culture around me, I still don't feel it or think that way.

                            I'm not Welsh simply because my parents are Welsh.

                            I'm English. It's to do with where you're born and the culture you actually grew up in so I have no idea why there is an assumption of embarrassment when someone says they're English/British and only their family come from South Asia.
                            Ethnicity is different to nationality. I was raised in England, as was my father as well. But ethnically I am Irish and I would never say I am English, they are a different ethnicity, and the more I study history and indeed present day culture the less I would wish to be associated with them.

                            So I would say I am Irish by ethnicity, or British if you ask my nationality.
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                            • #29
                              Re: Are South Asians really embarrassed of their origins?

                              I really don't like talking about my ethnicity and where I was born/citizenship. Cos I always get side-glances from people of my ethnicity, like they don't believe I'm Somali.
                              I was born in Norway but raised in the UK, so which should I claim, and would they 'claim' me back?
                              وَاقْصِدْ فِي مَشْيِكَ وَاغْضُضْ مِن صَوْتِكَ ۚ إِنَّ أَنكَرَ الْأَصْوَاتِ لَصَوْتُ الْحَمِيرِ - 31:19

                              And be moderate in your pace and lower your voice; indeed, the most disagreeable of sounds is the voice of donkeys."


                              أَلَمْ تَرَوْا أَنَّ اللَّهَ سَخَّرَ لَكُم مَّا فِي السَّمَاوَاتِ وَمَا فِي الْأَرْضِ وَأَسْبَغَ عَلَيْكُمْ نِعَمَهُ ظَاهِرَةً وَبَاطِنَةً ۗ وَمِنَ النَّاسِ مَن يُجَادِلُ فِي اللَّهِ بِغَيْرِ عِلْمٍ وَلَا هُدًى وَلَا كِتَابٍ مُّنِيرٍ - 31:20

                              Do you not see that Allah has made subject to you whatever is in the heavens and whatever is in the earth and amply bestowed upon you His favors, [both] apparent and unapparent? But of the people is he who disputes about Allah without knowledge or guidance or an enlightening Book [from Him].


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                              • #30
                                Re: Are South Asians really embarrassed of their origins?

                                You ought to come meet the locals.
                                Proper Pakistani People.
                                In Salwaar Kameez even in the winter.
                                What is this nonsense about being embarrassed.

                                Pakistan is less than 100 years old.
                                Whereas the culture is a lot older and spans all across the Asian region.
                                Nationality can change and so can identity.
                                Use it or lose it.

                                Majority of 'ethnics' in the West are products of the West.
                                They have been fed and nurtured by the West.
                                It's a fact.
                                They don't intentionally try to lose older cultural values.
                                It's merely a consequence.

                                Wait till you see the next generation Somali's.
                                Unless the community as a whole makes and effort, they will end up Western.

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