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Troubles with my mother, please advise

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  • aynina
    replied
    Re: Troubles with my mother, please advise

    Originally posted by .Zaryab View Post
    Ohh haha, I think he's good sister, but I will be sure to mention it to him and let you know through the messages? Really means a lot to me for you to offer us assistance sister, may Allah reward you abundantly and increase you in your sincerity and iman :)
    Allahumma ameen, you can definately ask me whenever you need something in sha Allah

    Leave a comment:


  • .Zaryab
    replied
    Re: Troubles with my mother, please advise

    Originally posted by aynina View Post
    haha no i assume you and your dad dont have a language barrier i meant like dealing with govt stuff or finding a place to live etc
    Ohh haha, I think he's good sister, but I will be sure to mention it to him and let you know through the messages? Really means a lot to me for you to offer us assistance sister, may Allah reward you abundantly and increase you in your sincerity and iman :)

    Leave a comment:


  • .Zaryab
    replied
    Re: Troubles with my mother, please advise

    Originally posted by uccello verde View Post
    Bismillah

    :salams

    Subhana'Allah.
    Allah SWT test those, who He loves.

    "It is he who created death and life to test which of you are best in deed, for He is the Almighty, the Forgiving."
    Quran 67:2

    Is your mother abusive to your brother? How is he coping? Can he move to stay with your father?

    May Allah SWT reward your sabr and good behavior towards your mother, Ameen.

    Carry on holding on your connection with your mother and brother. She needs medical help/counselling.
    Do you have any relatives living near or even in here? If, so can you speak with them. Maybe her side of family is able help.

    May Allah SWT make you those who are successful in Dunyah and Akherah, Ameen.
    Walaykum as salaam, and may the blessings and mercy of Allah be upon you. Firstly, thank you for taking the time to read my call for help and may Allah reward you for your sincerity.
    My mother is abusive towards him sometimes, but Alhamdulillah he can cope with the small amount. She stopped her counselling a while ago, as she didn't see it help her. Unfortunately, her side of the family are all in Norway, and I don't have much contact with them. My father's side are in London, and she despises them for no apparent reason, my auntie has tried to contact her and make her come to reason; but she threw a lot of abuse towards my auntie as well over the phone, which made me feel even worse with the situation. Jazakh'Allah for your prayers sister, may Allah reward you for your attempt to advise me.

    Leave a comment:


  • aynina
    replied
    Re: Troubles with my mother, please advise

    Originally posted by .Zaryab View Post
    Jazakh'Allah sister, but we're good on the language barrier. Did you mean to assist him with his communication with me? If so, our comm is good Alhamdulillah. And wow, what are the chances haha subhan'Allah
    haha no i assume you and your dad dont have a language barrier i meant like dealing with govt stuff or finding a place to live etc

    Leave a comment:


  • .Zaryab
    replied
    Re: Troubles with my mother, please advise

    Originally posted by aynina View Post
    if you need help with language or anything i live in belgium, depending on where he lives i might be able to help him out
    Jazakh'Allah sister, but we're good on the language barrier. Did you mean to assist him with his communication with me? If so, our comm is good Alhamdulillah. And wow, what are the chances haha subhan'Allah

    Leave a comment:


  • .Zaryab
    replied
    Re: Troubles with my mother, please advise

    Originally posted by uccello verde View Post
    Bismillah

    :salams

    Subhana'Allah.
    Allah SWT test those, who He loves.

    "It is he who created death and life to test which of you are best in deed, for He is the Almighty, the Forgiving."
    Quran 67:2

    Is your mother abusive to your brother? How is he coping? Can he move to stay with your father?

    May Allah SWT reward your sabr and good behavior towards your mother, Ameen.

    Carry on holding on your connection with your mother and brother. She needs medical help/counselling.
    Do you have any relatives living near or even in here? If, so can you speak with them. Maybe her side of family is able help.

    May Allah SWT make you those who are successful in Dunyah and Akherah, Ameen.
    Walaykum as salaam, and may the blessings and mercy of Allah be upon you. Firstly would like to thank you for taking the time to read my call for help, and may Allah reward you for your sincerity in your response.
    No, Alhamdulillah she is good with my brother. She's abusive towards him sometimes, but it's not something he cannot cope with. My father however does intend to take him away in the near future. Jazakh'Allah for your prayers, sister. I will try to, but she pushes me away with curses and threats that I'll be burning in hell, etc. Of course it's really hard to ignore sometimes, and try not to take to heart when she's my mother and a woman I love so much.

    Leave a comment:


  • aynina
    replied
    Re: Troubles with my mother, please advise

    Originally posted by .Zaryab View Post
    As salaam sister, it's a very complicated situation but my father left UK to Belgium for the sake of better career opportunities. Alhamdulillah he was able to start a buisness there which has shut down now, but he's always financially supported me when I'm down, even during his hard times as of now. Trying not to stress out, but a lot of thoughts rushing through, jazakh'Allah for your prayers and moral support.
    if you need help with language or anything i live in belgium, depending on where he lives i might be able to help him out

    Leave a comment:


  • .Zaryab
    replied
    Re: Troubles with my mother, please advise

    Originally posted by ABDEL-AZEEM View Post
    :wswrwb: Brother Zaryab
    Is your mother on Lithium (medication)? because she will continue to suffer from manic episodes if she is not on the Lithium (medication). https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lithium_(medication). Also she should take Glycine Supplements in'shaa'ALLAH in order to stabilized her moods and prevent another manic episode from reoccurring in'shaa'ALLAH. http://www.nutritional-supplements-h...m/glycine.html


    Your mother does not hate you at all , she is suffering from an chemical imbalance in the brain which makes her depressed all of time and makes her not interested in religion and makes her into worldly things. in'shaa'ALLAH Forgive your mother she has a physical mental disorder called bipolar that will make her suffer mentally for the rest of her life until they find a cure in'shaa'ALLAH. in'shaa'ALLAH Keep praying to ALLAH AL-AZEEM and ALLAH will cure her soon when ALLAH wills. ALLAH will bless you and reward you for your taking care of her in'shaa'ALLAH, so do not despair in'shaa'ALLAH.

    Remember Jannah lays under ones mother's feet http://islaam.org/E-Obli/E-Obli-24.html
    Jazakh'Allah for educating me upon this brother, may Allah reward you for taking the time to offer me comforting words and education. I think she did take that, she's on quite a lot of medication brother, and since I'm not in the home anymore I cannot confirm. Oh brother I have already forgiven her and understand it's a mental condition. It hurts me a lot in regards to why she's done this to me, but I convinced myself that she isn't completely herself anymore. Please remember me in your prayers, Allah reward you

    Leave a comment:


  • .Zaryab
    replied
    Re: Troubles with my mother, please advise

    Originally posted by shay5 View Post
    Your father should find work to provide for your brother....he is the parent not you....I think it was best you left the house since it seems your life was in danger...be kind to your mother from afar....ring her, visit when you can ...make sure she is getting all the adequate care ....don't stress yourself out too much...do the best you can....Allah knows the truth and your intentions...

    Praying for the best...
    As salaam sister, it's a very complicated situation but my father left UK to Belgium for the sake of better career opportunities. Alhamdulillah he was able to start a buisness there which has shut down now, but he's always financially supported me when I'm down, even during his hard times as of now. Trying not to stress out, but a lot of thoughts rushing through, jazakh'Allah for your prayers and moral support.

    Leave a comment:


  • thebench
    replied
    Re: Troubles with my mother, please advise

    Is she on medication? Is she linked into mental health services? Your mum needs professional help.

    Leave a comment:


  • uccello verde
    replied
    Re: Troubles with my mother, please advise

    Bismillah

    :salams

    Subhana'Allah.
    Allah SWT test those, who He loves.

    "It is he who created death and life to test which of you are best in deed, for He is the Almighty, the Forgiving."
    Quran 67:2

    Is your mother abusive to your brother? How is he coping? Can he move to stay with your father?

    May Allah SWT reward your sabr and good behavior towards your mother, Ameen.

    Carry on holding on your connection with your mother and brother. She needs medical help/counselling.
    Do you have any relatives living near or even in here? If, so can you speak with them. Maybe her side of family is able help.

    May Allah SWT make you those who are successful in Dunyah and Akherah, Ameen.

    Leave a comment:


  • ABDEL-AZEEM
    replied
    Re: Troubles with my mother, please advise

    Amino Acid Supplements for Bipolar Disorder . https://www.verywell.com/amino-acid-...isorder-378919

    GLYCINE uses and side effects and interactions and dosing.
    http://www.webmd.com/vitamins-supple...ntName=GLYCINE
    Last edited by ABDEL-AZEEM; 28-12-16, 08:54 PM.

    Leave a comment:


  • ABDEL-AZEEM
    replied
    Re: Troubles with my mother, please advise

    Originally posted by .Zaryab View Post
    As salaam brothers/sisters. I was hoping you guys could advise me as I don't have many people around me to talk to... Apart from talking to Allah.

    My mother divorced my dad 1 year ago, she became very depressed and bipolar and a lot of the time took it out on me. A lot of swear words and abuse, but I put up with because she's my mother and I know the rights Islam gives to a mother. But it got a point where she became very extreme, you know very hurtful abuse and physically trying to harm me and calling the police.. I will not lie, I didn't do anything back but I did angrily shout to her 'What is your problem with me?!' And I suppose that kicked her off even more. She's basically thrown me out of the home now and said I don't want you in my life. I tried to apologise, to forget and move on but she thrown me out and told me to arrange my own place to stay and come back only to collect my things. I do still want to provide for my mother, obviously.. But financially I'm barely able to support myself if I am to move. I'm a university student and working a job as well, and every month providing for her as well as my brother, as much as I'm able to and no of course I won't stop that out of anger.. Her favours upon me cannot be paid back.
    I'm hoping Allah can provide me a beautiful answer through you guys to me, may Allah reward you for taking the time to read and advise.

    Your brother from uk, Zaryab

    Also, my father resides in Belgium, but he is quite worried as well and trying his best to find / sort out a place.

    Please note, before somebody does eventually drop the 'there's two sides to one coin' - I genuinely haven't wronged my mother or aggravated her to throw me out. My whole extended family can testify to this and my aunties, uncles always rebuke her for her very extreme behaviour towards me. They tell me she got married too early and wasn't mature/ready for kids, it kind of reflects today and she's not very religious either, so I'm not sure what I'm to do. She prays 5x a day, but that's pretty much it. Never interested to discuss Islam, and is occupied with other worldly things and so is my brother. Jazakh'Allah
    :wswrwb: Brother Zaryab
    Is your mother on Lithium (medication)? because she will continue to suffer from manic episodes if she is not on the Lithium (medication). https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lithium_(medication). Also she should take Glycine Supplements in'shaa'ALLAH in order to stabilized her moods and prevent another manic episode from reoccurring in'shaa'ALLAH. http://www.nutritional-supplements-h...m/glycine.html


    Your mother does not hate you at all , she is suffering from an chemical imbalance in the brain which makes her depressed all of time and makes her not interested in religion and makes her into worldly things. in'shaa'ALLAH Forgive your mother she has a physical mental disorder called bipolar that will make her suffer mentally for the rest of her life until they find a cure in'shaa'ALLAH. in'shaa'ALLAH Keep praying to ALLAH AL-AZEEM and ALLAH will cure her soon when ALLAH wills. ALLAH will bless you and reward you for your taking care of her in'shaa'ALLAH, so do not despair in'shaa'ALLAH.

    Remember Jannah lays under ones mother's feet http://islaam.org/E-Obli/E-Obli-24.html
    Last edited by ABDEL-AZEEM; 28-12-16, 08:42 PM.

    Leave a comment:


  • shay5
    replied
    Re: Troubles with my mother, please advise

    Originally posted by .Zaryab View Post
    I wasn't going to mention, but she did stab me 2 years ago and hospitalised me because she lost the plot. I forgave her still.
    Your father should find work to provide for your brother....he is the parent not you....I think it was best you left the house since it seems your life was in danger...be kind to your mother from afar....ring her, visit when you can ...make sure she is getting all the adequate care ....don't stress yourself out too much...do the best you can....Allah knows the truth and your intentions...

    Praying for the best...

    Leave a comment:


  • .Zaryab
    replied
    Re: Troubles with my mother, please advise

    I wasn't going to mention, but she did stab me 2 years ago and hospitalised me because she lost the plot. I forgave her still.

    Leave a comment:

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