Salaam,
Let's call 'Father' 'X'.
'X' has never been there for me emotionally all of my life, merely in physical form.
'X' has never made an attempt to engage or build a fatherly relationship with me since my 19 years of existence.
'X' always uses intimidation (shouting, violent threats, slamming doors, verbal abuse) to demand control and power.
Lately, all of the above has gotten worse.
Recent background:
Finished A-Levels and scored A* AA, but due to an exam-board undermarking my papers and returning amended marks too late, I missed my offer and have been offered a deferred entry for 2017.
I have applied for 40 different jobs in the past 30 days interviewing 6 times.
2 of the interviews were "sales assistant, 100% commission" scams.
Got rejected after 1st / 2nd stage interviews for junior equity operations analyst positions, government procurement services and several more.
Also rejected / ignored by retail firms such as Tesco / Lidl without interview or acknowledgement for reasons which I cannot honestly fathom.
'X' keeps on berating me after every rejection and says that I will be unemployed for the rest of my life and that my studies were worthless.
'X' says that his friends sons were working part-time 20-25 hrs per week along side A-levels (they all got B/C grades or ended up failing A-levels) and that I was an idiot and failure for not finding work, even though I used to finish at 4-5 everyday from SFC and get home by 5-6 and was burnt out by the end of the week.
'X' is a backward thinking individual who cares more about what people think of him and values my worth to him according to 'prestige' of job I do and how much I earn and that's all there is to life for him.
'X' himself is uneducated and can barely speak English and is telling me that the reason for me not being able to get a job is because I probably failed my A-levels (even though he saw the results sheet himself) and that I'm lazy and not trying enough (even though I am contemplating taking up a night-shift job 2am in the morning where I have to walk 50 minutes to even get to the place, where I'm likely to get attacked or robbed on my way there).
I wish I grew up with a father and I feel deeply saddened that, that part of my childhood and life will never be experienced.
I wonder why I am facing such misfortune, I have never done bad nor wished bad upon anyone, and regardless of my position if I could help anyone out in any way I would always do so.
I would love to speak to someone who has gone through what I have gone through and am going through and seek your advice.
Jazak'Allah
PS - Please make dua for me
Let's call 'Father' 'X'.
'X' has never been there for me emotionally all of my life, merely in physical form.
'X' has never made an attempt to engage or build a fatherly relationship with me since my 19 years of existence.
'X' always uses intimidation (shouting, violent threats, slamming doors, verbal abuse) to demand control and power.
Lately, all of the above has gotten worse.
Recent background:
Finished A-Levels and scored A* AA, but due to an exam-board undermarking my papers and returning amended marks too late, I missed my offer and have been offered a deferred entry for 2017.
I have applied for 40 different jobs in the past 30 days interviewing 6 times.
2 of the interviews were "sales assistant, 100% commission" scams.
Got rejected after 1st / 2nd stage interviews for junior equity operations analyst positions, government procurement services and several more.
Also rejected / ignored by retail firms such as Tesco / Lidl without interview or acknowledgement for reasons which I cannot honestly fathom.
'X' keeps on berating me after every rejection and says that I will be unemployed for the rest of my life and that my studies were worthless.
'X' says that his friends sons were working part-time 20-25 hrs per week along side A-levels (they all got B/C grades or ended up failing A-levels) and that I was an idiot and failure for not finding work, even though I used to finish at 4-5 everyday from SFC and get home by 5-6 and was burnt out by the end of the week.
'X' is a backward thinking individual who cares more about what people think of him and values my worth to him according to 'prestige' of job I do and how much I earn and that's all there is to life for him.
'X' himself is uneducated and can barely speak English and is telling me that the reason for me not being able to get a job is because I probably failed my A-levels (even though he saw the results sheet himself) and that I'm lazy and not trying enough (even though I am contemplating taking up a night-shift job 2am in the morning where I have to walk 50 minutes to even get to the place, where I'm likely to get attacked or robbed on my way there).
I wish I grew up with a father and I feel deeply saddened that, that part of my childhood and life will never be experienced.
I wonder why I am facing such misfortune, I have never done bad nor wished bad upon anyone, and regardless of my position if I could help anyone out in any way I would always do so.
I would love to speak to someone who has gone through what I have gone through and am going through and seek your advice.
Jazak'Allah
PS - Please make dua for me
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