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I'm having a mental breakdown/fit of rage....

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  • I'm having a mental breakdown/fit of rage....

    I have autism, and often have meltdowns....I feel like I'm about to have one, and I had some characteristics of one.....I got very angry at the fact that my cousin serra had not called me in months, and the idea that no girl will ever love me.....so I started beating up my pillows (pretending they were girls), "choking" my pillow, beating up my bed, slamming my fists against my beds wooden board, threw the pillow across the room (pretending it was a girl), pretending to shoot people with my hand in the way children do.....and started to go through psychosis.......I also started to wonder if I had taken my medication, because many of my symptoms (i.e. psychosis, paranoia) were signs I hadn't, but then I remembered that I did.....I also fell into despair......it all started when I pretended I could communicate with my cousin by entering her dreams, and when I started to realize that that was scientifically impossible, I went berserk.....I feel very angry, and I just need to calm down......If you want to criticize me, please save it for later, and throw all you can at me, but right now, I just need to calm down.....it is past midnight where I live.....

  • #2
    Re: I'm having a mental breakdown/fit of rage....

    Brother, do you have any older, practicing Muslim brothers in your area who can act as a sort of mentor for you?

    Also, brother, no one will criticize you in sha Allah. Calm down now. Do you often make Dua?

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    • #3
      Re: I'm having a mental breakdown/fit of rage....

      Originally posted by ElKh View Post
      Brother, do you have any older, practicing Muslim brothers in your area who can act as a sort of mentor for you?

      Also, brother, no one will criticize you in sha Allah. Calm down now. Do you often make Dua?
      usually when I do dua it is rushed, as I have lost faith in dua as I believe it does not help, since Allah often does not grant duas due to what you want being outside your qadr.....I do have a mentor, but I hardly talk to him anymore, and he's not available a lot....he's an imam.......

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      • #4
        Re: I'm having a mental breakdown/fit of rage....

        Originally posted by Striving for Janna View Post
        usually when I do dua it is rushed, as I have lost faith in dua as I believe it does not help, since Allah often does not grant duas due to what you want being outside your qadr.....I do have a mentor, but I hardly talk to him anymore, and he's not available a lot....he's an imam.......
        Firstly, do not speak without knowledge. Du'a can change the Divine Decree.

        The Prophet :saw: said, "Nothing can change the Divine Decree except Du'a."
        Narrated by Ahmad, 5/677; Ibn Maajah, 90; al-Tirmidhi, 139. Classed as Hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami', 76687. See also al-Saheehah, 145

        So get that ignorant idea out of your mind. Maybe that is the reason for your anxiety and Allah knows best. Now that this knowledge has come to you, repent and make Du'a to Allah to change your situation. And only the most ungrateful of people lose hope in the mercy of Allah Subhana wa Ta'ala.

        About a mentor, can you find another one? I think this will benefit you greatly. Please heed the advice you receive on here and don't just come here to write about your problems. If you genuinely want to change your situation and become better, take the good advice that comes to you.

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        • #5
          Re: I'm having a mental breakdown/fit of rage....

          Be safe, brother. In sha Allah, a brother will read this post and offer to mentor you, even if just through phone calls. May Allah accept it as their Sadaqa and reward them abundantly for doing so.

          Please make Du'a, and concentrate on your Ibadah. Allah is Ar-Rahman, His Mercy is without limits, and may He have Mercy on you.

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          • #6
            Re: I'm having a mental breakdown/fit of rage....

            Originally posted by ElKh View Post
            Be safe, brother. In sha Allah, a brother will read this post and offer to mentor you, even if just through phone calls. May Allah accept it as their Sadaqa and reward them abundantly for doing so.

            Please make Du'a, and concentrate on your Ibadah. Allah is Ar-Rahman, His Mercy is without limits, and may He have Mercy on you.
            Amin...
            ".......He giveth and spendeth (of His bounty) as He pleaseth. But the revelation that cometh to thee from Allah increaseth in most of them (kuffar) their obstinate rebellion and blasphemy.Amongst them we have placed enmity and hatred till the Day of Judgment. Every time they kindle the fire of war, Allah doth extinguish it;but they (ever) strive to do mischief on earth. And Allah loveth not those who do mischief."(5:64)

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