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Should I treat my friend as a landlord from now on

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  • Should I treat my friend as a landlord from now on

    My friends back from holiday. Whilst away she locked her room, so that I couldn't get in it. Well, despite loving the security of knowing no one can get in your room I left my room open, with everything in it, only to come home and find that she locked hers.

    Clearly I'm not trusted, and this hurts me deeply. Should I give up on our friendship and just treat her as my landlord, because I can't be pretend, and it shows in my interactions with her.

    I feel super sad.

  • #2
    Re: Should I treat my friend as a landlord from now on

    your reading too much into this
    if i had a flatmate no matter how much i liked or trusted him id still probably lock my room whilst on holiday
    The sunnah is like the ark of Noah, whoever embarks upon it reaches salvation and whoever refuses is drowned.
    ~ Imam Malik (may Allah have mercy on him)

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    • #3
      Re: Should I treat my friend as a landlord from now on

      Originally posted by bismillaah View Post
      My friends back from holiday. Whilst away she locked her room, so that I couldn't get in it. Well, despite loving the security of knowing no one can get in your room I left my room open, with everything in it, only to come home and find that she locked hers.

      Clearly I'm not trusted, and this hurts me deeply. Should I give up on our friendship and just treat her as my landlord, because I can't be pretend, and it shows in my interactions with her.

      I feel super sad.
      I dont know why you're complaining, she has every right to lock away what is hers.....she is also doing you a favor...imagine she came back and something went missing, she would immediately blame you as you're the only one in the house so she is saving you from being looked upon with suspicion........you're definitely in the wrong here.....maybe you dont have valuables or your personality is open but the rest of us would lock away our things.......
      Women lost their modesty when men lost their gheerah..” .

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      • #4
        Re: Should I treat my friend as a landlord from now on

        Sis, your friend probably didn't even think anything of it. It's common practice for people to lock their doors if they know they will be away for a long time.

        Perhaps you are happy with keeping your door open but that is your standard and it is not fair to expect everyone to be just like you.

        If it is really affecting you and you can't figure this out on your own, perhaps talk to her about it in a non-accusatory way. Start your sentences with "I feel..." rather than "You did..." e.g. "I feel like I'm not trusted". InshaAllah, you can resolve this and hopefully you'll see this for the non-issue that it is.

        Nice of her to take you in - make dua for your host :up:
        And when it is said to them, "Do not cause corruption on the earth," they say, "We are but reformers." (11) Unquestionably, it is they who are the corrupters, but they perceive [it] not. (12) - Surat al-Baqarah
        http://www.ummzakiyyah.com/polygamy_not_my_problem/

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        • #5
          Re: Should I treat my friend as a landlord from now on

          Originally posted by bismillaah View Post
          My friends back from holiday. Whilst away she locked her room, so that I couldn't get in it. Well, despite loving the security of knowing no one can get in your room I left my room open, with everything in it, only to come home and find that she locked hers.

          Clearly I'm not trusted, and this hurts me deeply. Should I give up on our friendship and just treat her as my landlord, because I can't be pretend, and it shows in my interactions with her.

          I feel super sad.
          Make a stance and find somewhere else to live...doesn't your husband have any ideas?

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          • #6
            Re: Should I treat my friend as a landlord from now on

            Originally posted by zi-zizou View Post
            Make a stance and find somewhere else to live...doesn't your husband have any ideas?
            Shots fired
            Women lost their modesty when men lost their gheerah..” .

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            • #7
              Re: Should I treat my friend as a landlord from now on

              Originally posted by shay5 View Post
              Shots fired
              I'll get a neg rep, get called uncle and that's about it.

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Should I treat my friend as a landlord from now on

                No matter how good the friend is, I still wouldn't want them rooting around my stuff in my absence. No big deal, just take it easy. Her action was normal.
                Allah gave us two ears and one mouth, so we can listen more and talk less.

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                • #9
                  Re: Should I treat my friend as a landlord from now on

                  something extremely complicated happened last night


                  i get out the house super early, so i left early. Knowing i have my valuables in my room and all my documents, I still risked it all, and left it open. I come home, she locked hers. Well this morning I locked my room- felt super happy all day knowing no no 1 can get in my room and my valuables are safe, but sad we had ruin our friendship over this. we gonna have 2 locked rooms in a house and no friendship. :(

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Should I treat my friend as a landlord from now on

                    Originally posted by bismillaah View Post
                    something extremely complicated happened last night


                    i get out the house super early, so i left early. Knowing i have my valuables in my room and all my documents, I still risked it all, and left it open. I come home, she locked hers. Well this morning I locked my room- felt super happy all day knowing no no 1 can get in my room and my valuables are safe, but sad we had ruin our friendship over this. we gonna have 2 locked rooms in a house and no friendship. :(
                    You've still got us sis.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Should I treat my friend as a landlord from now on

                      Originally posted by zi-zizou View Post
                      You've still got us sis.
                      Go away, don't you gave some cat to walk, or some newspapers to read.

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                      • #12
                        Re: Should I treat my friend as a landlord from now on

                        Originally posted by bismillaah View Post
                        Go away, don't you gave some cat to walk, or some newspapers to read.
                        Don't you have a husband to cook for?

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