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  • #76
    Re: Emotional binging

    [MENTION=1489]neelu[/MENTION] thank you so much for the great advise, i will definately buy the book, my mum always 'supports' me, shes basically been controlling everything i put in my mouth for the last 10 years and giving commentary on everything to 'help' me but it works the oposite way actually, it feels horrible to have her judge everytime i eat unhealthy or even when i try to lose weight having her tell me I'm doing it wrong its just always food and its become so annoying
    يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلنَّاسُ ٱعْبُدُوا۟ رَبَّكُمُ ٱلَّذِى خَلَقَكُمْ وَٱلَّذِينَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَتَّقُونَ

    O mankind, worship your Lord, who created you and those before you, that you may become righteous

    Surah Al Baqarah ayah 21

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    • #77
      Re: Emotional binging

      Eat half of what you normally eat and walk 3km daily, the more the better. Increase your water intake. Replace candy with fruits and nuts. Walk daily, I am repeating this because it is really important.

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      • #78
        Re: Enotional binging

        Originally posted by Ya'sin View Post
        I think this topic is taken lightly when it shouldn't be.
        Yes

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        • #79
          Re: Enotional binging

          Originally posted by aynina View Post
          I forced myself, b3cause if i cant moderate my addiction i have to stop al together
          Yeah no. You can't do that.

          I've also had an eating disorder and fallen into this same trap.

          With quitting quickly and all together like that, you're limiting yourself enormously. You're depriving yourself of what is your "normal". Because you're forcing your body through this sudden shift, you're going to feel terrible. By consuming less calories, if you experience a significant drop in your calorie consumption (talking about calorie count here, not food in of itself), you may also be telling your body to go into starvation mode. And starvation mode is not healthy at all. This mode is telling your body that you're not eating enough, so your body takes in all the new calories its receiving and starts storing them as fat.

          You're going to really crave the unhealthy foods and binges and hate what you are restricting yourself to. So when you do give in to your binges (and you will, as you've done), you're going to fall, hard. You're going to overeat more than you usually would because you've been depriving yourself, and subconsciously you have to "make up" for that time you were "dieting." And because your body is in starvation mode, all those calories you're consuming from the binge will go to fat storage. Then you hate yourself and feel disappointed in yourself for failing, so you start again with the very restrictive diet. Then you fail, then try again, fail again, etc.... The cycle is never-ending. If you're like me, you would gain more weight from these experiences, and not lose anything at all.

          You have to wean yourself off unhealthy foods at the pace that's right for you; reach a balance. Moderation is key. (Removing one unhealthy food from your lifestyle at a time may help as well, so that you're not overwhelming yourself with quitting all at once and you're gradually getting into the process of eating healthier. You should also definitely eat or cook healthy food that tastes really good! It will be good motivation.)

          Additionally, the thing about being on diets is that you'll just going to gain the weight / get unhealthy again as soon as you resume your regular schedule. So you have to fix your lifestyle and make the conscious, permanent decision to stick to healthier meals and snacks. Full time, not a diet. You can still of course enjoy your favorite snacks and desserts every once a while. But it shouldn't be a regular occurrence. Again: moderation.

          Never reward yourself with food either. That's also a very bad habit to get into. Change your rewards to something non-food related.

          And please please research and understand your body/the food consumption process since you're really struggling with this issue. Insha'Allah being more informed about your body and the changes you're putting yourself through (both physically and emotionally), will help you understand yourself better and potentially even learn how to grasp better control of the situation.
          Last edited by Comrox; 13-09-16, 05:39 AM.

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          • #80
            Re: Enotional binging

            Originally posted by Comrox View Post
            Yeah no. You can't do that.

            I've also had an eating disorder and fallen into this same trap.

            With quitting quickly and all together like that, you're limiting yourself enormously. You're depriving yourself of what is your "normal". Because you're forcing your body through this sudden shift, you're going to feel terrible. By consuming less calories, if you experience a significant drop in your calorie consumption (talking about calorie count here, not food in of itself), you may also be telling your body to go into starvation mode. And starvation mode is not healthy at all. This mode is telling your body that you're not eating enough, so your body takes in all the new calories its receiving and starts storing them as fat.

            You're going to really crave the unhealthy foods and binges and hate what you are restricting yourself to. So when you do give in to your binges (and you will, as you've done), you're going to fall, hard. You're going to overeat more than you usually would because you've been depriving yourself, and subconsciously you have to "make up" for that time you were "dieting." And because your body is in starvation mode, all those calories you're consuming from the binge will go to fat storage. Then you hate yourself and feel disappointed in yourself for failing, so you start again with the very restrictive diet. Then you fail, then try again, fail again, etc.... The cycle is never-ending. If you're like me, you would gain more weight from these experiences, and not lose anything at all.

            You have to wean yourself off unhealthy foods at the pace that's right for you; reach a balance. Moderation is key. (Removing one unhealthy food from your lifestyle at a time may help as well, so that you're not overwhelming yourself with quitting all at once and you're gradually getting into the process of eating healthier. You should also definitely eat or cook healthy food that tastes really good! It will be good motivation.)

            Additionally, the thing about being on diets is that you'll just going to gain the weight / get unhealthy again as soon as you resume your regular schedule. So you have to fix your lifestyle and make the conscious, permanent decision to stick to healthier meals and snacks. Full time, not a diet. You can still of course enjoy your favorite snacks and desserts every once a while. But it shouldn't be a regular occurrence. Again: moderation.

            Never reward yourself with food either. That's also a very bad habit to get into. Change your rewards to something non-food related.

            And please please research and understand your body/the food consumption process since you're really struggling with this issue. Insha'Allah being more informed about your body and the changes you're putting yourself through (both physically and emotionally), will help you understand yourself better and potentially even learn how to grasp better control of the situation.
            Thanks for all the help sis, the reward thing also makes a lot of sense, ur tips are definitely helpfull
            يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلنَّاسُ ٱعْبُدُوا۟ رَبَّكُمُ ٱلَّذِى خَلَقَكُمْ وَٱلَّذِينَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَتَّقُونَ

            O mankind, worship your Lord, who created you and those before you, that you may become righteous

            Surah Al Baqarah ayah 21

            Comment


            • #81
              Re: Enotional binging

              Sorry to hear that about your mum. I love my mum but she can drive me up the wall sometimes and she also does this thing where she thinks she's being "helpful" in her advice but it's having the opposite effect. Alhamdullilah I have learned over time how to disregard what she says a lot of the time. Sometimes I'll say to her "I know you're trying to help but this is not helping" and part of learning to disregard also involves being able to shut her voice out when she reacts with some lecture about how I have no manners or respect lol. Shutting her out at such times has been better for our relationship considering that I live with her. My sister on the other hand can't shut her out and gets tearful and upset and then my mum gets annoyed that why does she cry over insignificant things and not understand that her mother is trying to offer help and support lol.

              Anyway Comrox is right, "forcing yourself" and will power do not work- this is mentioned in Dr Phil's book. What he says is that making yourself go on a diet and trying to use willpower is like what he calls "white knuckling", it's like going cold turkey- you will get withdrawal symptoms. What he says is that you are in this situation because you eat to try and fill an emotional void, so when you diet and restrict your eating, that emotional void and depressed feeling keeps getting worse until you binge... then you do binge and feel depressed for not having willpower.

              What he suggests you do (along similar lines to what Comrox mentioned) is that over time, you learn to find coping mechanisms that aren't food based. So someone says something upsetting to you and your normal response would be to eat, but following his plan involves learning a different response. What other ways are there to relieve the tension? Can you talk it over and cry on the phone to a friend? Can you beat up a punchbag or break some plates until you feel better? Can you walk out of the house and just go for a walk in the park or somewhere that helps you relax? Depending on what you're interested in and what works better for you, you learn new coping mechanisms for coping with your emotions and that helps you feel less reliant on the food for support which makes it easier to avoid binge eating. He even set up an online network a few years ago in which hundreds/thousands of people on his weight loss program could contact each other and support each other with advice or just a listening ear and some empathy from people who know what you're going through can help you through it.

              Once you address the emotional side, THEN he talks about the practical aspect of addressing what you eat. He might not say this, but in my opinion, I believe refined sugar and white flour products are addictive regardless of your emotional issues, so I wont say give them up completely, but try to cut them down as much as you can. If you want something sweet, then you can still have fruit, or unrefined sweet things like honey and dates (which are sunnah anyway) or maple syrup and if you want a carb hit, then alternate each day meaning like one day your carb can be banana in a smoothie and the next day it can be a portion of new or jersey royal potatoes (I hear they're healthier and less likely to cause GI fluctuations than full size potatoes) and the next day you can have basmati rice or quinoa, or some would go further and say avoid potatoes and have sweet potatoes or pumpkin/squash instead.

              Oh I almost forgot, I always advise anyone looking into healthy eating about this. If nothing else, the FIRST thing you should avoid are the unhealthy drinks. Stop all fizzy drinks/sodas (or restrict to only once a week), stop all squash drinks like ribena and restrict a glass of fruit juice to only twice a week (or you can have it once a day if it's freshly squeezed cos' that has far more vitamins in). Do not have more than 2 cups of tea/coffee per day and do not put more than one teaspoon of sugar in the cup and do not sneak in a biscuit or bakery item to go with it. People talk too much about healthy eating in the context of junk food and changing what you eat when actually the first problem is often what we drink. People say we should eat more like our grandparents and one of the major differences in their diet is they didn't drink such things anywhere near as much as our generation do. I'm not saying give them up 100%, restricting it means you can still treat yourself or you can still be social at a restaurant and order things without being the oddball who only gets a salad whilst wanting to cry at what everyone else is eating. Instead of unhealthy drinks, you can have milkshake (banana milkshake or mango lassi have such sweet fruit they don't need added sugar), or smoothies (check the sugar content if you buy it but much better home made) and vegetable juicing is good for you too though I haven't done it.

              I think the addictive components here are sugar, white refined flour and caffeine, so drastically limiting your intake of those whilst finding suitable alternatives is a good idea. I personally don't trust most cereals either (again, our grandparents didn't eat those, they went to work on an egg). Notice how most of the "convenience" foods are junk, addictive and bad for you. It's a sign of a sick society but anyway work on the emotional stuff before delving too much into the practicalities of your eating habits and although I haven't read the book (I saw a few shows based on it), I think it can help you more effectively than so called slimming drinks and dieting programs.

              Let us know how you get on. If you don't have supportive friends, you can PM me if you like.

              Edit: oh another important point, DO NOT expect quick results! Do not get depressed because you haven't lost any weight that one week when you did everything right. This is not about shifting x pounds per week, this is about first addressing the emotional triggers then translating that into practical actions on a permanent basis- let me know if that makes sense cos' if it does, it means when you eat better, you WONT feel deprived... if you eat good wholesome healthy meals and it makes you feel like crap, it means something is still wrong. You can see some interesting reviews here (btw I don't work for Dr Phil or amazon lol I know this sounds like advertising but I'm not paid to promote this hehe):
              https://www.amazon.com/Ultimate-Weig.../dp/B001SARCHU
              Last edited by neelu; 13-09-16, 08:04 PM.
              The Lyme Disease pandemic: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5u73ME4sVU

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