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  • I've never felt so empty and lost

    Salamualaikum.

    I feel disconnected from my Rabb. I don't feel that my relationship with Him is strong or even near strong. I feel ashamed at myself.

    Empty, completely lost, not really motivated about much in life, depressed. I'll feel short temporary moments of happiness and then the emptiness and sadness will just hit me again and again........and again...

    Yeah, all of us deal with hardships and trials in life, but I know that even if almost everything was going near perfectly, I'd probably still have these unwanted feelings due to my disconnection with Allah.

    I don't think my heart is hard, I hope not inshaAllah. Because I love Allah and remember Him daily. And deep down I know that He loves me as well. I just wish to feel from my heart my love for Him..I just want to feel the emotions. I don't want to waste my life feeling like this anymore-these unwanted feelings of misery because I really think if I continue this way, I'll be doomed.

    Where do I start? What do I do?

    JazakAllahu Khairan.
    Indeed we belong to Allah,
    and indeed to Him we will return.


    Quran 2:156

  • #2
    Re: I've never felt so empty and lost

    :wswrwb:

    Start doing regular dhikr. Specially subhan Allah, Alhamdulillah, Allahu Akbar (33,33,34)
    Pray sunnah and voluntary prayers along with the fardh prayers.
    Do wudhu as much as you can. I had fever yesterday and I thought wudhu with cold water would make it worse, it got better to my surprise.
    Memorise Quran. It does not take your time, it puts barakah in it.

    Allah make it easy for you
    Bandon say dil naa lagao sirf Allah say lagao.

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: I've never felt so empty and lost

      Originally posted by ninety1daisies View Post
      Salamualaikum.

      I feel disconnected from my Rabb. I don't feel that my relationship with Him is strong or even near strong. I feel ashamed at myself.

      Empty, completely lost, not really motivated about much in life, depressed. I'll feel short temporary moments of happiness and then the emptiness and sadness will just hit me again and again........and again...

      Yeah, all of us deal with hardships and trials in life, but I know that even if almost everything was going near perfectly, I'd probably still have these unwanted feelings due to my disconnection with Allah.

      I don't think my heart is hard, I hope not inshaAllah. Because I love Allah and remember Him daily. And deep down I know that He loves me as well. I just wish to feel from my heart my love for Him..I just want to feel the emotions. I don't want to waste my life feeling like this anymore-these unwanted feelings of misery because I really think if I continue this way, I'll be doomed.

      Where do I start? What do I do?

      JazakAllahu Khairan.
      Don't feel ashamed sister. I learned here that iman fluctuates and is not always constant.

      I'm guessing what you want is direction right sis? I'll lay out something and insha allah you follow it. Btw I do not always follow through with this myself because I am a weirdo but this has been tested and tried...and is beneficial.

      1) Set aside time for dhikr- dhikr is awesome. Sometimes Muslims like me forget that being a servant of Allah (swt) and worshipping Him, worship is not just the five prayers. It's essential to our iman for us to spend some time recollecting our thoughts of the greatness of the Lord (swt) and making dhikr in that manner. In the Quran Allah says:

      "Those who have believed and whose hearts have rest in the remembrance of Allah. Verily in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest!"-surat Ra'd

      "Those men and women who engage much in Allah's praise. For them has Allah prepared forgiveness and a great reward." (33:35)

      I just read the second ayah a short while ago, and I realize that hey, if we start to engage in a lot more dhikr regardless of our past sins or the state of our heart, Ar-Rahman has prepared forgiveness and a great reward. It only reinforced the importance I've realized...of dhikr. Plus, when you are outside and sometimes the nafs gets the better of you or you end up feeling inadequate or depressed...dhikr is such a great thing...I can't really explain to you how much it cures those tiny issues that play us around in daily life.

      Start steady and do it whenever you feel comfortable. Your only deadline for doing dhikr is death and Allah wants to hear your voice, He loves you, all the time, every hour every day. Preferably I like it after salah and before bed, but even in the bus or grocery store you can do this silently.

      2) Talk to Allah (swt)

      Okay I know this may be weird...I am not saying you should or anything...but that's what I do. There have been times quite recently that I felt very afraid of what sins I accumulated...or been afraid because I wronged someone....so I want to complain to a friend or my parents or make a thread...but I realize those can't solve my issues all the time. Sometimes I want to cry and no one's there to sympathize....so one thing I like to do is make duaa...for EVERYTHING that comes to my mind....like EVERYTHING even if I am shy about it...this is God we're talking about. Allah is closer to us than our veins so whether or not I feel ashamed...I must make duaa, I must talk. I really must.

      "(Muhammad), if any of My servants ask you about Me, tell them that the Lord says, "I am near; I accept the prayers of those who pray." Let My servants answer My call and believe in Me so that perhaps they may know the right direction."

      Isn't this so mind-boggingly sweet and wonderful sis? Allah is telling us He is always near, and it just emphasizes how important calling out to Him is. It is the key- calling to Allah, answering the call of Allah and believing in Allah is the key to the right direction. I am not a tafseer student or anything, but when this ayah speaks to me, I know which direction I want, and [MENTION=134214]ninety1daisies[/MENTION], I know which one you want. And by making dua we can get them both. And I know we all make dua but do we spend ten minutes a day doing so....why don't we spend an hour of free time doing so since we can afford the time, right? Let's get goin' girl!!!:up:

      3) Quran

      Nothing much needed to be said. In the Fortification of the Muslim, there is a dua which says:

      “O Allah, I am your slave, the son of your slave. My forelock is in Your Hand. Your judgment of me is inescapable. Your trial of me is just. I am invoking You by all the names that You call Yourself, that You have taught to anyone in Your creation, that You have mentioned in Your Book, or that You have kept unknown. Let the Qur’an be delight of my heart, the light of my chest, the remover of my sadness and the pacifier of my worries.”

      Isn't that soothing? Subhanallah, the Messenger of Allah (saw) spoke the truth. Quran is God's word to us. Umar ibn al-Khattab had so much enmity for Rasulullah (saw) prior to him reverting to Islam that he wanted to kill our Prophet (saw). Yet upon hearing the first ayat of Surat-Taha upon his temperomandibular membrane, or aka his ear/eardrums he felt that 360 degree turn. We know how he was before Islam...so what about you sis? 'O my sister in faith, O' you whose heart is drenched with worry about your akhirah, verily if you let it, the Quran will claim your heart and you will be of the chosen ones, those who recite the Quran and bi idhnillah ta'ala, teach it.

      4) Wake up early

      Even if you end up sleeping at 2am try getting up before Fajr and staying uo (not going back to sleep). It is good for your iman and reading the Quran after Fajr is a beautiful thing and a leisure for those who are able to. Sleeping into the morning can be a bit depressing or make one lazy. #FromExperience

      5) Make a timetable the night before

      If you make a timetable you will feel more sense of purpose in your life. Think about what you want to achieve and set it down into tinier chunks and make a list. Do you want to cook? Do you want to learn and memorize Quran? Do you want exercise?

      Whatever it is you want to do, make sure it includes Qur'an hifth, Quran reflection (reading the English) at least. However learning the deen is also important and if you have the time I highly recommend you try to set aside specific times for studying and reading from the various branches of the deen. [MENTION=116227]vildan[/MENTION] can explain it more

      Make sure you have a plan and you have spiritual and self-development goals as they are very important. My aunt told me that imam said in khutbah that:

      “Whoever follows a path to seek knowledge, Allah will make the path to Jannah (Paradise) easy for them.” [Sahih Muslim 2699; Sunan Tirmidhi 2945].

      6) Religious Goals

      Night prayer is a struggle for all of us. Fasting isn't easy. Step by step attempt to make tiny spiritual goals for yourself and strive to achieve them. It is better and will make you content when you reach one milestone...and then the next insha allah.

      7) Parents

      Yeah hehe, I had to add the last one. It's really amazing. If you see your mom doing the dishes, try relieving her of them and do it yourself. If dad came from work and is tired, make him tea or massage his feet. I am sure you are the apple of their eyes sis insha allah.

      However I wasn't always the best daughter to my parents and I do testify that if people knew the happiness and serenity that a person gets when their parents make duaa for them, their success, their dunya, and their akhirah, no body on this earth would seek pleasure in the haram- including that which have seduced so many, like money, power, fame, and haram relationships.

      Anyway this is long and I did not realize I wrote a lot but I hope this helps. I love you for the sake of Allah sister and I hope this helps even a bit insha allah.

      -Figs
      Thee do we worship, and Thine aid we seek.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: I've never felt so empty and lost

        *sigh I've known all along what I must do, I just never really got around to doing it. But this time I need to take that first step and just DO IT. InshaAllah, I must let go of a lot of things/habits that are distracting me from my purpose in life and from truly connecting with my Rabb.

        Leaving UF is one of them, and I know this because I've become an addict, sadly lol. Addictions that distract you from worshiping your creator properly sets you up for failure at everything. I'm not asking for a ban though because I want to see if I at my own will don't come back and follow through with my desire in reconnecting with my creator. If I come back, I'll know there's something seriously wrong with my heart...May Allah protect me from that.

        I'm really sorry if I have ever offended anyone in any way. Please forgive me for my shortcomings. From my stay on UF, I haven't really been offended by anyone here :) I felt really welcomed by you Brits mashAllah. I definitely learned a lot from here though :) inshaAllah I will try to apply what I have learned into my life. May Allah bless you all.

        Met a lot of amazing and intelligent brothers and sisters as well.

        [MENTION=133616]Lavender[/MENTION] [MENTION=131974]Creamcake[/MENTION] [MENTION=116227]vildan[/MENTION] [MENTION=125704]Figs[/MENTION] [MENTION=131705]**Sister**[/MENTION] [MENTION=127762]muslimah4life1[/MENTION] my girls :) I'll miss you and won't forget our silly, inspirational, motivating, and giggly conversations lol. I would message each one of you personally, but I'm so lazy. See I really got problems I need to sort out lol. Ya'll will always have a special place in my heart, and I love you. My duas are with you, please keep me in yours inshaAllah. I'll be logging off now and inshaAllah will not be logging back in to view pms or reps.

        InshaAllah all of us on UF can meet in Jannah :) but first we need to work hard to actually get there. Allah is the most merciful.

        Asalamualai'kum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh.

        *Exits (for real this time, inshaAllah)
        Indeed we belong to Allah,
        and indeed to Him we will return.


        Quran 2:156

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: I've never felt so empty and lost

          Originally posted by ninety1daisies View Post
          *sigh I've known all along what I must do, I just never really got around to doing it. But this time I need to take that first step and just DO IT. InshaAllah, I must let go of a lot of things/habits that are distracting me from my purpose in life and from truly connecting with my Rabb.

          Leaving UF is one of them, and I know this because I've become an addict, sadly lol. Addictions that distract you from worshiping your creator properly sets you up for failure at everything. I'm not asking for a ban though because I want to see if I at my own will don't come back and follow through with my desire in reconnecting with my creator. If I come back, I'll know there's something seriously wrong with my heart...May Allah protect me from that.

          I'm really sorry if I have ever offended anyone in any way. Please forgive me for my shortcomings. From my stay on UF, I haven't really been offended by anyone here :) I felt really welcomed by you Brits mashAllah. I definitely learned a lot from here though :) inshaAllah I will try to apply what I have learned into my life. May Allah bless you all.

          Met a lot of amazing and intelligent brothers and sisters as well.

          [MENTION=133616]Lavender[/MENTION] [MENTION=131974]Creamcake[/MENTION] [MENTION=116227]vildan[/MENTION] [MENTION=125704]Figs[/MENTION] [MENTION=131705]**Sister**[/MENTION] [MENTION=127762]muslimah4life1[/MENTION] my girls :) I'll miss you and won't forget our silly, inspirational, motivating, and giggly conversations lol. I would message each one of you personally, but I'm so lazy. See I really got problems I need to sort out lol. Ya'll will always have a special place in my heart, and I love you. My duas are with you, please keep me in yours inshaAllah. I'll be logging off now and inshaAllah will not be logging back in to view pms or reps.

          InshaAllah all of us on UF can meet in Jannah :) but first we need to work hard to actually get there. Allah is the most merciful.

          Asalamualai'kum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh.

          *Exits (for real this time, inshaAllah)
          :crying2::love::love::love::love::love::love:

          Ok sis, you know what is best for you and I wish you the best in your future endeavors. Make dua for me insha allah and pleaaaaaaaaaaaase at least read my reply before you leave forever from my sight :(

          -Figs
          Thee do we worship, and Thine aid we seek.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: I've never felt so empty and lost

            Originally posted by ninety1daisies View Post
            *sigh I've known all along what I must do, I just never really got around to doing it. But this time I need to take that first step and just DO IT. InshaAllah, I must let go of a lot of things/habits that are distracting me from my purpose in life and from truly connecting with my Rabb.

            Leaving UF is one of them, and I know this because I've become an addict, sadly lol. Addictions that distract you from worshiping your creator properly sets you up for failure at everything. I'm not asking for a ban though because I want to see if I at my own will don't come back and follow through with my desire in reconnecting with my creator. If I come back, I'll know there's something seriously wrong with my heart...May Allah protect me from that.

            I'm really sorry if I have ever offended anyone in any way. Please forgive me for my shortcomings. From my stay on UF, I haven't really been offended by anyone here :) I felt really welcomed by you Brits mashAllah. I definitely learned a lot from here though :) inshaAllah I will try to apply what I have learned into my life. May Allah bless you all.

            Met a lot of amazing and intelligent brothers and sisters as well.

            [MENTION=133616]Lavender[/MENTION] [MENTION=131974]Creamcake[/MENTION] [MENTION=116227]vildan[/MENTION] [MENTION=125704]Figs[/MENTION] [MENTION=131705]**Sister**[/MENTION] [MENTION=127762]muslimah4life1[/MENTION] my girls :) I'll miss you and won't forget our silly, inspirational, motivating, and giggly conversations lol. I would message each one of you personally, but I'm so lazy. See I really got problems I need to sort out lol. Ya'll will always have a special place in my heart, and I love you. My duas are with you, please keep me in yours inshaAllah. I'll be logging off now and inshaAllah will not be logging back in to view pms or reps.

            InshaAllah all of us on UF can meet in Jannah :) but first we need to work hard to actually get there. Allah is the most merciful.

            Asalamualai'kum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh.

            *Exits (for real this time, inshaAllah)
            I'm so upset to see you leave dear sis but i ask Allah swt to grant you the best and if this is better for you, Alhamdulillah.

            I know your not going to be back to see my post, but if you ever come across it please remember what i told you previously. Its important that you dont let the struggles of this world effect your relationship with Allah swt no matter what. If you feel like your connection with Allah swt has weakened or you feel hopeless/lost, then try your very best to be steadfast in the deen of Allah swt and all will get better, in shaa Allah. Pray tahujjud, make thikr, read Quran and try your best to uphold the Quran and Sunnah in your life. If you are consistent with the following then your relationship with Alah swt will strengthen over time, in shaa Allah.

            Lots of love dear sis. I will be making heaps of du'a, in shaa Allah xxx

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: I've never felt so empty and lost

              Originally posted by ninety1daisies View Post
              *sigh I've known all along what I must do, I just never really got around to doing it. But this time I need to take that first step and just DO IT. InshaAllah, I must let go of a lot of things/habits that are distracting me from my purpose in life and from truly connecting with my Rabb.

              Leaving UF is one of them, and I know this because I've become an addict, sadly lol. Addictions that distract you from worshiping your creator properly sets you up for failure at everything. I'm not asking for a ban though because I want to see if I at my own will don't come back and follow through with my desire in reconnecting with my creator. If I come back, I'll know there's something seriously wrong with my heart...May Allah protect me from that.

              I'm really sorry if I have ever offended anyone in any way. Please forgive me for my shortcomings. From my stay on UF, I haven't really been offended by anyone here :) I felt really welcomed by you Brits mashAllah. I definitely learned a lot from here though :) inshaAllah I will try to apply what I have learned into my life. May Allah bless you all.

              Met a lot of amazing and intelligent brothers and sisters as well.

              [MENTION=133616]Lavender[/MENTION] [MENTION=131974]Creamcake[/MENTION] [MENTION=116227]vildan[/MENTION] [MENTION=125704]Figs[/MENTION] [MENTION=131705]**Sister**[/MENTION] [MENTION=127762]muslimah4life1[/MENTION] my girls :) I'll miss you and won't forget our silly, inspirational, motivating, and giggly conversations lol. I would message each one of you personally, but I'm so lazy. See I really got problems I need to sort out lol. Ya'll will always have a special place in my heart, and I love you. My duas are with you, please keep me in yours inshaAllah. I'll be logging off now and inshaAllah will not be logging back in to view pms or reps.

              InshaAllah all of us on UF can meet in Jannah :) but first we need to work hard to actually get there. Allah is the most merciful.

              Asalamualai'kum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh.

              *Exits (for real this time, inshaAllah)


              This made me so sad my heart sank Daisy, but making the most of this world to have a beautiful afterlife is more important so I respect your decision. You have a special spot in my heart and I'll seriously miss you so much. Thanks for being patient with me whenever I annoyed you and please forgive me if I've ever hurt you in any way. InshaaAllah lets all work hard to get to Jannah so we can reunite. May Allah make you very successful in achieving your goals in this world and the afterlife and may you be rewarded massively for all the times you advised me ameen. Love you very much for Allah's sake sis :love:
              "Let the days do as they please
              And be optimistic when destiny decrees
              Do not despair due to the events of the past
              For the events of this world were not meant to last"

              - Imam Shafi'i

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: I've never felt so empty and lost

                dear sister asalaamu alaikum

                try this dua insha allah it will help you.

                1. Bismillah Rahmaan Raheem

                اللَّهُمَّ اِنِّىْ اَسْئَلُكَ حُبَّكَ وَ حُبَّ مَنْ يُّحِبُّكَ وحُبَّ عَمَلٍ
                O Allah! I ask You for Your love and the love of those who love You, and for the love of every action which will bring me closer to Your love.

                Ameen.

                From <http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?270022-Duaa-for-the-ULTIMATE-Love>

                2. اللَّهُمَّ اجْعَلْ حُبَّكَ أََحَبَّ الأَشْيَاءِ إِلِىْ ، وَاجْعَلْ خَشْيَتَكَ أَخْوَفَ الأَشْيَاءِ عِنْدِيْ وَاقْطعْ غَنِّي حَاجَاتِ الدُّنْيَا بِالشُّوْقِ إِلى لِقَائِكَ ، وَ إِذضا أَقْرَرْتَ أَغْيُنَ أَهْلِ الدُّنْيَا مِنْ دُنْيَا هُمْ ، فَاقْرِرْ عَيْنِيْ مِنْ عِبَادَتِك

                Allahummaj'al hubbaka a-habbal ashyaa'i illayya, waj'al khashyataka akhwafa ashyaa'i 'indi, waq-ta 'anni haajaatid-dunya bish shawqi illa liqaa'ika, wa idha aq-rarta 'a'yunna ahlid-dunya min dunnyahum, faqrir 'ayyni min 'ibaadatika.

                O Allah! Make my love for You the most beloved thing to me, and my fear for You the most fearful thing to me, and remove from me all worldly needs and wants by instilling a passion for meeting You, and when You have given the people of the world the pleasures of their world, make the coolness of my eyes (pleasure) in worshipping You.

                From <http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?270022-Duaa-for-the-ULTIMATE-Love>


                wasalaam

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