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How do I get rid of twisted fetishes?

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  • #16
    Re: How do I get rid of twisted fetishes?

    Originally posted by bhshawon View Post
    If I were to do that, I might have to drop a semester. I don't want to do that.
    Uni lib should be open long hours in general... Maybe you can check out a laptop if your lib has that option and use it there in the open.
    Indeed we belong to Allah,
    and indeed to Him we will return.


    Quran 2:156

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    • #17
      How do I get rid of twisted fetishes?

      Brother have you tried getting Quran done? I heard jinns can fall in love with you when you watch things like that.

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      • #18
        Re: How do I get rid of twisted fetishes?

        Originally posted by Rosine911 View Post
        Brother have you tried getting Quran done? I heard jinns can fall in love with you when you watch things like that.
        You mean ruqya.
        Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

        "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
        - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

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        • #19
          Yes ruqya / jinns can fall in love with you when you watch things like this. I remember one of the signs were: you have erotic/wet dreams where your doing it with someone sometimes a close family member-Gross I know! I remember I read this one story where this guy would have these dreams where he was doing it with this beautiful girl and subhanallah when the Quran was read on him a female jinn spoke. When asked why she had possessed him it said because of his weakness and addiction to pornography.

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          • #20
            Re: How do I get rid of twisted fetishes?

            Originally posted by Rosine911 View Post
            Brother have you tried getting Quran done? I heard jinns can fall in love with you when you watch things like that.
            I try to listen Quran after fazr often in youtube, usually 10-20 verses(in arabic with english translation, I'm listening to 4th surah currenty). I also spend 2-3 hour per day(sometimes more) on average listening to islamic lectures.

            Again I stayed off those things for about 2 months. But got relapsed a few times last week.

            I have just done domain blocking in router, it will work InshaAllah.

            InshaAllah I will try to make an anti-porn app for android after this semester(exams coming in 2 weeks), maybe It can help some other people like me.

            Also I recite Sura Nas and Falaaq quite often, those are 2 of the few surahs I have memorized.
            Last edited by bhshawon; 30-12-15, 07:10 AM.
            Winning an argument doesn't mean you're on truth, losing an argument doesn't mean you're on falsehood.

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            • #21
              Re: How do I get rid of twisted fetishes?

              BTW I am interested in tafseer, I was listening to Nouman Ali Khan(I have bayyinah membership), then I found Abu Mussab's video where he shows how NAK can be misleading, may Allah guide him. Can you guys recommend someone on youtube for listening tafseer? Specially surah Kahaaf, Nouman Ali Khan built a great interest for that surah in me.
              Winning an argument doesn't mean you're on truth, losing an argument doesn't mean you're on falsehood.

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              • #22
                Surah kahf that's like one of my favourite surahs. Sorry I only know noumen Ali khaan inshallah someone else can help you out here.

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                • #23
                  Re: How do I get rid of twisted fetishes?

                  wa alaykumasalam

                  Read the Qur'an and keep going. Out loud, not silently and in the best tajwid you can. ( it makes a difference). It's more beneficial than reading stories/ listening to lectures/listening to the Qur'an combined. It's like a reset button.

                  Dedicate time every day to recite, don't look at it as ibaadah or extra optional good deeds. Look at it as therapy.

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                  • #24
                    How do I get rid of twisted fetishes?

                    [MENTION=136016]bhshawon[/MENTION] If you've got issues know that Qur'an is the shifa. Try do hifz like a page-a-day and recite it in salat pondering over its meanings. At the end of the day, it's you're choice to take the advice and if you wanna stop or not.
                    [SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman][B][U][CENTER]Oh Allah, in your name, I die and live.[/CENTER][/U][/B][/FONT][/SIZE]
                    [CENTER]:):lailah::lailah::lailah::lailah::)[/CENTER]

                    [B][CENTER]Ya Allah, Grant Me A Heart That Sees[/CENTER][/B]

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                    • #25
                      Re: How do I get rid of twisted fetishes?

                      Originally posted by 1412 View Post
                      wa alaykumasalam

                      Read the Qur'an and keep going. Out loud, not silently and in the best tajwid you can. ( it makes a difference). It's more beneficial than reading stories/ listening to lectures/listening to the Qur'an combined. It's like a reset button.

                      Dedicate time every day to recite, don't look at it as ibaadah or extra optional good deeds. Look at it as therapy.
                      I don't know how to read Arabic. I learned a little when I was a boy, but forgot most of it. I have exams coming in about 2 weeks, I will start learning afterwards InshAllah.
                      Winning an argument doesn't mean you're on truth, losing an argument doesn't mean you're on falsehood.

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                      • #26
                        Re: How do I get rid of twisted fetishes?

                        WalaykumAssalam Dear Brother,

                        Those who have been addicted to this filth know how hard it is to get out of it. It is not simple as just wishing to leave it. But one can get out of it. It is a struggle. But it is possible.

                        However I would say after every act make wudhu and pray two rakat for forgiveness. There is a saying something to the effect of 'Do not let Shaytaan rob you twice, Once by causing you to sin and then by making you loose hope in Allah's (Glorified and Exalted be He) forgiveness.' Call upon Allah a lot by begging Him. Increase in your acts of worship step by step and hold on to each one of them. Just don't give up hope. You will see In sha Allah this struggle will turn you into a better person. Just remember one thing after every act when you are full of guilt and feel like a hypocrite - 'I am not giving up. I'll will try to rid myself of this evil habit no matter how long it takes.' But be sure to seek Allah's forgiveness, His mercy and His guidance.

                        Remember your Lord is more Merciful to you than your mother. If your mother knew of your struggle wouldn't she do anything to help you get out of this addiction? Then what about He who is the All Powerful and is over All things Competent? Do not let this thought pass you that he has forsaken you. '... I am as my slave thinks of Me...' So think good of Him and know that it is not hard for Him to help you get out of this. Perhaps He is testing your determination and sincerity. Also remember He is ' ...forgiver of sin, acceptor of repentance,...' but also '...severe in punishment,...' [40:3]

                        On a side note I remember reading in Malcom X's biography when he was talking about why most of the dark skinned brothers who joined the NOI where ex drug addicts and were loyal to this group. It was because when one of them made a decision to quit drugs, they would keep him in a room with other members of the NOI. When the addiction got to the man's head and he started to crave for the drugs facing the withdrawal symptoms. The other members would hold him down till it subsided. This they did every time he became out of control. In this way he eventually lost the addiction. They would remember later how their brothers stayed close to them all the time and helped them get out of it.
                        If the Muslim community today could stay close together to their brothers and sisters who are addicted to this vulgarity. By constantly reminding them. Guiding them to what is good. Helping them get married and so on. How good that would be.
                        https://youtu.be/CqmX_bKWE9A
                        وَاللّهُ عِندَهُ حُسْنُ الْمَآبِ

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                        • #27
                          Re: How do I get rid of twisted fetishes?

                          :wswrwb:

                          My dear brother, I understand your struggle. Pornography never satisfies. It often starts with something small, but that eventually wears off, so you start watching more extreme stuff because the stuff you once watched doesn't arouse you anymore. That's why there are so many kinds of pornography-- because people need to get a fix, so they move from one kind of porn to another.

                          The real problem is emptiness. That's why addictions are ablle to thrive in our society. You feel emptiness, so you use pornography to give you a high. The high never satisfies, though, and I'm glad that you recognize that. You're already making progress, though; Alhamdulillah. I know it can be intimidating to wonder how to get rid of a porn habit, but it's not as intimidating if you take it day by day. Next time you've got a desire to view pornography, cry out to Allah azza wa jal to deliver you from it.

                          Take it day by day. Just focus on how to get through today. Working out can help, too.
                          "Wert thou to follow the common run of those on earth, they will lead thee away from the way of Allah. They follow nothing but conjecture: they do nothing but lie." (surah 6:116)

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                          • #28
                            Re: How do I get rid of twisted fetishes?

                            Originally posted by bhshawon View Post
                            Assalamu Alaikum, I'm a 22 yo male. I've been addicted to pornography for about 5-6 years. And in the last 3-4 years I mostly watched twisted pornography like rape, torture, bondage, humiliation, degradation etc. I became a friday muslim(I didn't even used to attend every jummah, rather once in 2-3 weeks, because I heard a hadith that a person becomes disbeliever if he doesn't attend 3 jummahs in a row). However, even though I prayed little, I asked in my prayer often to be able to get rid of these things. And for 3-4 months I had been trying to reduce the amount of porn I watch gradually. I was able to reduce it from daily to twice a week, but after a while I forgot the plan to eventually get rid of it, and rather started to feel I deserved those 2 days of porn and masturbation each week.

                            About two months ago, some events(including death of a friend) in my life made me realize how dire my situation is, and how I wouldn't have anything to answer to Allah if I die now. So I stopped watching porn completely. I also stopped watching movies, listening music. I also used to be an avid gamer, but I don't play much now(a racing game in my PC, and a couple of casual games in my phone. I used to hate these kind of games and was into fantasy/action RPGs). However I can't delete the porns I already watched, and I'm often thinking of those things. Sometimes I'm justifying my thoughts by imagining I'm doing this with my future wife. I realize myself how crazy it sounds.

                            But recently 2-3 days ago, I was browsing amazon, and after a while found myself browsing sex toys, fetish wears and bdsm devices, I after about 2 months, I relapsed and masturbated. The same thing happened yesterday(I even watched 2-3 minutes of porn) and after that I was wrecked and ashamed of myself. I offered salat-al-tawba and prayed for guidance. After all that, I found myself searching for and looking at bdsm devices today morning, although I was able to stop myself this time alhamdulillah.

                            I don't know if these things are plot of shaytan or are they from myself. And I don't know how to get rid of them. These thoughts are eating my insides.

                            I do offer salat 5 times everyday, and I spend a great deal of time watching islamic lectures and reading islamic materials. I finished reading 'The Sealed Necter' few days ago alhamdulillah. Stories of the sacrifices of prophet(SAW) brought me to tears a couple of times, but it also brought moments of weak faith where I was questioning why the prophet(SAW) did such and such. I also don't look at girls at street anymore and and trying to stay away from wrongdoings and lies.

                            Please help me with any advice you can. I'm also interested in knowing there is anyone who had gone through what I'm going through. Am I going to hard on myself? From my experience as I already mentioned, going through steps doesn't work for me. Can I ever be normal again about my sexual fantasies and live a normal life? Zazakallah khair.

                            Get married.

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                            • #29
                              Re: How do I get rid of twisted fetishes?

                              Originally posted by Londoner1 View Post
                              Get married.
                              Well, it is a good way to destroy a marriage before it has even got off the ground, that's for sure.

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                              • #30
                                Re: How do I get rid of twisted fetishes?

                                Bite yourself whenever you get tempted to...

                                Do lots of dhikr of Allah. I mean, think of Him SWT a lot. In shaa' Allah you will find it more disgusting that way and leave it.

                                Keep yourself in good company. If you have no company, then whenever you get tempted.... Eheeeeeeeeeeeeeeemmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..............

                                Think, if it was your sister that was on that tape? your mother? your aunt? Yeah I know what you are thinking.

                                You are violating another's future mother, sister, grandma or whatever.
                                La ilaha illallahu, wahdahu la sharika lahu, lahul-mulku wa lahul-hamdu, wa Huwa 'ala kulli sha'in Qadir
                                (there is no true god except Allah. He is One and He has no partner with Him; His is the sovereignty and His is the praise, and He is Omnipotent),'
                                Do not say about Allah but Truth.

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