aslam o alikum everyone
i am a 20 years old university student. and i always try to follow islam
i don't smoke. i don't have the habit of telling lies or speaking i'll of others nor i think ill of others.i always lower my gaze whenever i am in public place or in university etc i don't have any girlfriend ... never been on date etc and Alhamadulillah i offer my prayers, keep my promises and pay my debts no matter how small of big it is etc
recently i have started growing my beard..... and list goes on an on
i mean i try to follow islam at my best to please Allah swt but the problem is that i end up watching porn and i cannot control it don't know why it happens after a month or a little more time after that. and i apologize Allah swt for my sin and make up my mind not to do it again but it still happens again
i am really frustrated, sad and disappointed right now. Every time i commit this sin i feel very ashamed before offering prayer because i think how can i go before Allah swt with this face and because of sin i recently committed and after one day i feel real bad that i cry and apologize Allah for what i did. i know for sure that when i will get married it will not happen again.
but the question in my mind is am i able to be called a good muslim? because if i were i would not end up doing this sin again and again. this is the reason i hate myself alot.
i am a 20 years old university student. and i always try to follow islam
i don't smoke. i don't have the habit of telling lies or speaking i'll of others nor i think ill of others.i always lower my gaze whenever i am in public place or in university etc i don't have any girlfriend ... never been on date etc and Alhamadulillah i offer my prayers, keep my promises and pay my debts no matter how small of big it is etc
recently i have started growing my beard..... and list goes on an on
i mean i try to follow islam at my best to please Allah swt but the problem is that i end up watching porn and i cannot control it don't know why it happens after a month or a little more time after that. and i apologize Allah swt for my sin and make up my mind not to do it again but it still happens again
i am really frustrated, sad and disappointed right now. Every time i commit this sin i feel very ashamed before offering prayer because i think how can i go before Allah swt with this face and because of sin i recently committed and after one day i feel real bad that i cry and apologize Allah for what i did. i know for sure that when i will get married it will not happen again.
but the question in my mind is am i able to be called a good muslim? because if i were i would not end up doing this sin again and again. this is the reason i hate myself alot.
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