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Can a woman seperate herself from the bed when she wants?

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  • Can a woman seperate herself from the bed when she wants?

    One of my friend has been married for 2 years now, and he's kinda trapped in it. That fool obeys whatever his wife tell him to do. She even refuses to have intimacy with him whenever she wants. And she even threatens him with divorce sometime.

    All I can say is that something is not right here.

    Is a woman (or a man) allowed to refuse intimacy in a marriage for no good reason?

  • #2
    Re: Can a woman seperate herself from the bed when she wants?

    intimacy is something that no one should refuse their spouce for no good reason and is sinful. BUT this man should NOT be discussing his marriage with you, ESPECIALLY the intimacy details! that is a sin on his part.
    Fabi-ayyiala -i rabbikuma tukaththibani
    Then which of the favors of your Lord will ye deny?
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr8DR8frP_s

    You are not here just to fill space or to be a background character in someone else's movie. Consider this: nothing would be the same if you did not exist. Every place you have ever been and everyone you have ever spoken to would be different without you. We are all connected, and we are all affected by the decisions and even the existence of those around us.

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    • #3
      Re: Can a woman seperate herself from the bed when she wants?

      well sometime, when someone needs help from someone else while he/she is in an oppressive relationship. It is necessary

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      • #4
        Re: Can a woman seperate herself from the bed when she wants?

        Originally posted by Yusuf_ View Post
        well sometime, when someone needs help from someone else while he/she is in an oppressive relationship. It is necessary
        Tell him to speak to an imam

        By not giving him his marital rights, she is more or less oppressing him, n she should be made aware of this

        __________________________________________________ _____________________________



        please donate to the Ummah forum sadaqa jariya project. Click on the link for for more information, and to make a donation- https://www.justgiving.com/sadaqah-jariyah-project/

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        • #5
          Re: Can a woman seperate herself from the bed when she wants?

          she shouldn't be refusing him, talk about selfish...
          O people who take pleasure in a life that will vanish, falling in love with a fading shadow is sheer stupidity~ Ibn Qayyim Al-Jawziyya

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          • #6
            Re: Can a woman seperate herself from the bed when she wants?

            how is she threatening him with divorce? :scratch:
            "O you who have believed, shall I guide you to a transaction that will save you from a painful punishment?
            (It is that) you believe in Allah and His Messenger and strive in the cause of Allah with your wealth and your lives. That is best for you, if you should know.
            He will forgive for you your sins and admit you to gardens beneath which rivers flow and pleasant dwellings in gardens of perpetual residence. That is the great attainment"
            .


            "And (you will obtain) another (favour) that you love - victory from Allah and an imminent conquest; and give good tidings to the believers"
            .

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            • #7
              Re: Can a woman seperate herself from the bed when she wants?

              :salams

              The wife is not allowed to refuse intimacy with the husband
              Collection of Arabic Learning material and Islamic Books



              Away for a bit :wavey:

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              • #8
                Re: Can a woman seperate herself from the bed when she wants?

                Wow, just wow.

                The idea that a woman must allow her husband to do it even if she doesn't want to.

                I wonder why people say Islam is oppressive to women.

                I don't doubt that there is sharia justification for this. (moderator, if you are watching...).

                I am shocked though to learn this.

                Does this mean that a man can insist, and as long as she doesn't fight back, he can do it even if his wife doesn't want to?

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                • #9
                  Re: Can a woman seperate herself from the bed when she wants?

                  Originally posted by iwasjimmyjimmy View Post
                  Wow, just wow.

                  The idea that a woman must allow her husband to do it even if she doesn't want to.

                  I wonder why people say Islam is oppressive to women.

                  I don't doubt that there is sharia justification for this. (moderator, if you are watching...).

                  I am shocked though to learn this.

                  Does this mean that a man can insist, and as long as she doesn't fight back, he can do it even if his wife doesn't want to?
                  Unless she has a justified reason she cant, illness or whatever.
                  Intimacy in marriage is important, it's one of the reasons you get married, to fulfill your desires.
                  But just withholding to punish the man, that is not allowed.
                  The woman is given many rights in marriage and doesn't have to do much in return, one of they few things is be available to her man.
                  I honestly don't understand how one can refuse relations with ones spouse simply out of spite.
                  Collection of Arabic Learning material and Islamic Books



                  Away for a bit :wavey:

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                  • #10
                    Re: Can a woman seperate herself from the bed when she wants?

                    Originally posted by Yusuf_ View Post
                    One of my friend has been married for 2 years now, and he's kinda trapped in it. That fool obeys whatever his wife tell him to do. She even refuses to have intimacy with him whenever she wants. And she even threatens him with divorce sometime.

                    All I can say is that something is not right here.

                    Is a woman (or a man) allowed to refuse intimacy in a marriage for no good reason?
                    your friend is responsible for the relationship he is in. I can't beleive he complained to you about his wife not giving him intimacy?

                    I think married men that need society or hadith to tell their wife to be intimate with them are a pathetic joke. If someoene gave him the idea that it's ok for him to go outside and look for a replacement wife, then he'll be full of ideas of how to attract another woman. Dress nice, spend money, talk nicely etc etc. But when it comes to the wife at home, a woman who probably has never known another man, then the husband is just dumb struck as to how to get her attention.

                    Maybe your friend just not interesting enough for her. Maybe she just isnt' getting anything out of the whole situation, so when she denies intimacy she doesn't lose anything. If he made it worth her while to be intimate with him, then she'd just see it as her own loss.

                    All I can say is, I don't beleive this excuse.

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                    • #11
                      Re: Can a woman seperate herself from the bed when she wants?

                      Are you trying to say he might be.....boring........:embar:

                      __________________________________________________ _____________________________



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                      • #12
                        Re: Can a woman seperate herself from the bed when she wants?

                        Originally posted by Muslima London View Post
                        Are you trying to say he might be.....boring........:embar:
                        Loooool now that's just......................awkward
                        O people who take pleasure in a life that will vanish, falling in love with a fading shadow is sheer stupidity~ Ibn Qayyim Al-Jawziyya

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                        • #13
                          Re: Can a woman seperate herself from the bed when she wants?

                          Originally posted by Muslima London View Post
                          Are you trying to say he might be.....boring........:embar:
                          Originally posted by sabah suleiman View Post
                          Loooool now that's just......................awkward
                          Well she's not getting it from anywhere else. So if she doesn't want it from him, what does that tell us...

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                          • #14
                            Re: Can a woman seperate herself from the bed when she wants?

                            Originally posted by Ikki View Post
                            Well she's not getting it from anywhere else. So if she doesn't want it from him, what does that tell us...
                            :embar:

                            OP - tell your 'friend' to check out the resources for married couples at teh top of the marriage thread.

                            __________________________________________________ _____________________________



                            please donate to the Ummah forum sadaqa jariya project. Click on the link for for more information, and to make a donation- https://www.justgiving.com/sadaqah-jariyah-project/

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                            • #15
                              Re: Can a woman seperate herself from the bed when she wants?

                              Originally posted by Yunus aua View Post
                              Unless she has a justified reason she cant, illness or whatever.
                              Intimacy in marriage is important, it's one of the reasons you get married, to fulfill your desires.
                              But just withholding to punish the man, that is not allowed.
                              The woman is given many rights in marriage and doesn't have to do much in return, one of they few things is be available to her man.
                              I honestly don't understand how one can refuse relations with ones spouse simply out of spite.
                              Well, I found just about every word that you wrote to be deeply offensive. I am sure you are sincerely expressing the official position as you see it in the religion, I'm not making this personal.

                              Every woman has a right under law to not have sex for whatever reason she likes, whenever she likes.

                              Any man who overrides her objections would therefore be a rapist in the eyes of the law. I assume that nobody would support such behaviour.

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