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Saving my female friend

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  • #16
    Re: Saving my female friend

    I'm back!

    Originally posted by Hadid View Post
    It might be that shaytan is just playing with your mind, trying to give you an "excuse" to talk with her some more. You say that you're thinking about her all the time, that's not good.
    My intention is to save her, not fulfill my passion... But, if I can't, it's fine, I'm tired...

    Originally posted by Muslima London View Post
    i agree

    Maybe, you can get some islamic literature and just give them to her. Just give them, walk away. no need for chit chat.............oh sister, you need to read this, yes sure - meet me after school so we can discuss or better still just leave it on her desk
    Somehow you say "Yes", to my previous question: Is it okay if I'm sending her a text with something like "don't go near me, don't go near any boys, don't do anything that could put you to hell" ?

    Originally posted by Faissaloo View Post
    Stay her friend, leave when she is doing haram. Every day give her a spoonful of stuff to pull her away from that life, thats what I do with my non-muslim friends.
    How did you do that? Is your friends is a boy or a girl?
    I really can't get too close to her, she could overly attached to me, this was happened to me once, long time ago...
    Somehow, you also said "Yes" to my previous question...

    Originally posted by rainbow*~ View Post
    So being friends with someone you're not attracted to is okay? :scratch:
    I didn't really like hanging out with girls, but this is school, boys and girls, they're all my friends... I just keep everything under control...

    Originally posted by ceeri_sista View Post
    Ma sha' Allah it is very kind of you to care for your sister in Islam. Instead of texting her can you maybe tell a female teacher that the girl might be subjecting herself to peer pressure. Naivety and wanting to be with the 'cool kids' can surely get one in trouble.
    Apart from that distance yourself from anything that can lead to haraam.

    And remember the hadeeth that aas mentioned by brother hadid.

    May Allah reward you, and keep you and us steadfast.
    Amen :)
    I can't do a serious talk with every people (I guess), that's why I'm an ignorant...


    I got another idea... What if, I send her a message (on twitter, she's there), but with an account that doesn't show myself... Is that okay?

    Remember, her childish personality makes her easily affected with bad things, she's getting worst, that's why I wanted to help her, no other reason...

    The last thing I wanna do is "ignore her until we're both graduated and never met again", because I'm getting tired from all of this "helping stuff"...
    Just like Muslima London said "You can't save her. Only she can save herself from hellfire but that comes with allah's mercy", and ignoring helps...
    Last edited by Ryanz; 05-10-13, 08:32 AM.

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    • #17
      Re: Saving my female friend

      Texting leads to one text n another n then another

      Just give her some books.
      Leave them on her desk/ locker whatever
      Ibnul Qayyim رحمه الله said: "Donít ruin your happiness with worry, and donít ruin your mind with pessimism. Donít ruin your success with deception and donít ruin the optimism of others by destroying it. Donít ruin your day by looking back at yesterday.
      __________________________________________________ _____________________________
      If you think about your situation, you will find that Allaah (سبحانه وتعالى) has given you things without asking, so have trust in Allaah (سبحانه وتعالى) that He doesnít prevent anything you want except there is goodness for you.

      You could be sleeping and the doors of the heavens are being opened with duaías being made on your behalf, SubhanAllaah: perhaps from someone poor whom you helped, or someone sad whom you brought joy, or someone passing by and you smiled at him, or someone in distress and you removed it.. so donít ever underestimate any good deeds."



      please donate to the Ummah forum sadaqa jariya project. Click on the link for for more information, and to make a donation- https://www.justgiving.com/sadaqah-jariyah-project/

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      • #18
        Re: Saving my female friend

        Originally posted by Muslima London View Post
        Texting leads to one text n another n then another

        Just give her some books.
        Leave them on her desk/ locker whatever
        That's the problem... We have a moving class system, changing class, desk, and sit, everytime, no locker, the only thing that permanent to her is her bag, which is placed in a class full of my other classmate, sorry I should've told that before...

        I'm gonna send her a url, a link, or a site with islamic literature... I won't send anything other than that, I promise...
        Please don't think I fell in love to her, I've been holding something like that for my whole life and will keep doing that until I have my wife or until I die, whichever comes first...
        This is the last thing I could think of, the other thing is ignore her forever... I can't talk to her because I can't do a serious talk...
        Last edited by Ryanz; 05-10-13, 01:53 PM.

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        • #19
          Re: Saving my female friend

          Originally posted by Ryanz View Post

          Please don't think I fell in love to her, I've been holding something like that for my whole life and will keep doing that until I have my wife or until I die, whichever comes first...
          This is the last thing I could think of, the other thing is ignore her forever... I can't talk to her because I can't do a serious talk...
          Aww that's cute :inlove: but remember bro sometimes we don't have control over who we do/don't fall in love with it just happens. I'd still be weary and guard my heart.

          In a similar predicament as you tbh with that respect. Really want to tell these girls I know that guys and girls can't just be friends in Islam but don't know how to go about it. I'm worried they'll think that I'm just jealous that they have guy mates and thus more male attention, when that's not really the case. I used to have guy friends before too but I learnt my lesson, male-female friendships are a slippery slope.
          :sub: wabihamdihi:sub:hiladheem

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          • #20
            Re: Saving my female friend

            I think you should approach her with some sincere advice. You don't need to get close to her to do that as that sounds like more trouble than its worth.
            The Lyme Disease pandemic: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5u73ME4sVU

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            • #21
              Re: Saving my female friend

              Originally posted by rainbow*~ View Post
              Aww that's cute :inlove: but remember bro sometimes we don't have control over who we do/don't fall in love with it just happens. I'd still be weary and guard my heart.

              In a similar predicament as you tbh with that respect. Really want to tell these girls I know that guys and girls can't just be friends in Islam but don't know how to go about it. I'm worried they'll think that I'm just jealous that they have guy mates and thus more male attention, when that's not really the case. I used to have guy friends before too but I learnt my lesson, male-female friendships are a slippery slope.
              Originally posted by neelu View Post
              I think you should approach her with some sincere advice. You don't need to get close to her to do that as that sounds like more trouble than its worth.
              Well, It's kinda similar to you, rainbow*~ ...
              In my case, If I tell her or approach her with some sincere advice (as neelu said), I'm worried that she might think "Oh, so you do have feelings for me"
              Her childish personality will make it worse...
              My character will also make it worse, because I never talk serious to anyone... never talk serious because I was known like that by everyone...
              I ever express my feelings to a girl once (when I was 10th grade), it end with unhappy ending (of course)...
              That's why I never express my feelings to anyone...

              Anyone agree with my "mysterious message plan"?
              The plan is... I make a twitter account, that does not have my name on it... send her a url/link/websites of an Islamic literature that she need... that's it... no other thing...

              I'm very confident that I can control my emotion or feelings... It is very easy :)
              Last edited by Ryanz; 05-10-13, 03:56 PM.

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              • #22
                Re: Saving my female friend

                Originally posted by Ryanz View Post
                Well, It's kinda similar to you, rainbow*~ ...
                In my case, If I tell her or approach her with some sincere advice (as neelu said), I'm worried that she might think "Oh, so you do have feelings for me"
                Her childish personality will make it worse...
                My character will also make it worse, because I never talk serious to anyone... never talk serious because I was known like that by everyone...
                I ever express my feelings to a girl once (when I was 10th grade), it end with unhappy ending (of course)...
                That's why I never express my feelings to anyone...

                Anyone agree with my "mysterious message plan"?
                The plan is... I make a twitter account, that does not have my name on it... send her a url/link/websites of an Islamic literature that she need... that's it... no other thing...

                I'm very confident that I can control my emotion or feelings... It is very easy :)
                NO, you think its gonna be easy but the shaitan is a very enemy of ours, always giving us ideas and making us go that little bit step forward in sinning.

                Look, if you donot do anything fine. The best thing you can do for a fellow muslim is pray for them.

                personally - what i'm picking up here is ..........you seem to be a bit fixated by her and are using this excuse to get close to her. If i've got that right - then pls accept my apologies
                Ibnul Qayyim رحمه الله said: "Donít ruin your happiness with worry, and donít ruin your mind with pessimism. Donít ruin your success with deception and donít ruin the optimism of others by destroying it. Donít ruin your day by looking back at yesterday.
                __________________________________________________ _____________________________
                If you think about your situation, you will find that Allaah (سبحانه وتعالى) has given you things without asking, so have trust in Allaah (سبحانه وتعالى) that He doesnít prevent anything you want except there is goodness for you.

                You could be sleeping and the doors of the heavens are being opened with duaías being made on your behalf, SubhanAllaah: perhaps from someone poor whom you helped, or someone sad whom you brought joy, or someone passing by and you smiled at him, or someone in distress and you removed it.. so donít ever underestimate any good deeds."



                please donate to the Ummah forum sadaqa jariya project. Click on the link for for more information, and to make a donation- https://www.justgiving.com/sadaqah-jariyah-project/

                Comment


                • #23
                  Re: Saving my female friend

                  Originally posted by Muslima London View Post
                  NO, you think its gonna be easy but the shaitan is a very enemy of ours, always giving us ideas and making us go that little bit step forward in sinning.

                  Look, if you donot do anything fine. The best thing you can do for a fellow muslim is pray for them.

                  personally - what i'm picking up here is ..........you seem to be a bit fixated by her and are using this excuse to get close to her. If i've got that right - then pls accept my apologies
                  I said it's 80:20, so I am kinda fixated, I got fixated because this girl, she's really put herself on the edge of a cliff... Making me feels like "Oh, God please save her"...
                  In my plan, I won't tell my name, that's why I won't get close to her... The purpose is to save her, not to get close to her... I also wanted to send that thing, to my other friends who also put their life on the edge of a hell, that way I could affect them with a good Islamic literature... It's okay right?
                  Last edited by Ryanz; 06-10-13, 03:35 PM.

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