Adopting instead of having kids

[.Kid.]

Re: Adopting instead of having kids

Blood is not everything, i don't get the "why dont you have your own kids" question. It's like the sister swore something

She brought it up so it's just being discussed.

I just find it strange for a Muslim to have that opinion.

That's just me I guess.

[Massilia]

Re: Adopting instead of having kids

She brought it up so it's just being discussed.

I just find it strange for a Muslim to have opinion.

That's just me I guess.

It's not being discussed, no one has answered the simple question, she's just being branded as a weirdo who doesn't want to give birth like "what? Why Why but you can do both why why why"/

[.Kid.]

Re: Adopting instead of having kids

It's not being discussed, no one has answered the simple question, she's just being branded as a weirdo who doesn't want to give birth like "what? Why Why but you can do both why why why"/

She already got her answer.

But now her view point is being discussed and why she holds to it.

[Green786]

Re: Adopting instead of having kids

Yes, I have provided a link to help answer the sister's question.

[Massilia]

Re: Adopting instead of having kids

She already got her answer.

But now her view point is being discussed and why she holds to it.

And she said

I choose not to have them. I don't have to have some huge big reason, I just feel more comfortable this way and happier if I feel like I'm helping a soul that has already been brought into this world (and might go to hell) than bring an extra one. But that's just me

[HmInh]

Re: Adopting instead of having kids

Why would you not want your own children.
You can also adopt but normally people adopt if they cannot reproduce.

I think I can partly explain the sister's disinterest in having her own children, as I'm someone who would like to have kids but not have my own kids.
Not everyone has the desire to physically have their own children. Really. When I think of taking care of kids, I know that I'd be interested in that part. The "pregnancy" and "giving birth" part I am not at all interested in. I don't like the idea of feeling like my own body is changing rapidly (without me being able to control it to a point), I don't like the idea of that kind of attention on me or anything I would bring to this world... and I don't like that idea that I would "bring something into this world". As emotional as a response can get, it just makes me purely nauseous and ill to think about myself pregnant.

Again, I adore children (as I'm sure the OP does too). People are kind of shocked at how I can relate and play with children, but at the end of the day... my own personal nightmare (besides Hell) is definitively being pregnant.

[*aisha*]

Re: Adopting instead of having kids

It's not being discussed, no one has answered the simple question, she's just being branded as a weirdo who doesn't want to give birth like "what? Why Why but you can do both why why why"/

I agree,,i dont get why everyone is so pushy why why why at her, sheesh

[Abu 'Abdullaah]

Re: Adopting instead of having kids

I agree,,i dont get why everyone is so pushy why why why at her, sheesh

We need to know her manhaj status.

ON or OFF?

[.Kid.]

Re: Adopting instead of having kids

wow...you guys need to calm down.

[Abu 'Abdullaah]

Re: Adopting instead of having kids

wow...you guys need to calm down.

btw, people have divorced for far less...

[.Kid.]

Re: Adopting instead of having kids

btw, people have divorced for far less...

..?

[inprogress]

Re: Adopting instead of having kids

To me having kids is not so much about a desire to do it, but more about a religious duty.

[Excuse_me]

Re: Adopting instead of having kids

Dua of the child for the parent even after their death is accepted. That alone is enough insha'Allah.

[HmInh]

Re: Adopting instead of having kids

To me having kids is not so much about a desire to do it, but more about a religious duty.

But most sheikhs I've spoken to have mentioned that while it's incredibly encouraged, it's not at all obligatory to have children.

(Again, you did mention that for you it's a religious obligation... so maybe I'm reading too much into that statement! Sorry! :o)

[R.Aisha]

Re: Adopting instead of having kids

Why not both though? there is a lot of blessings that come with having your own kids. Especially for a mother, just opens the gates of Jannah for you.

You could have adopted kids at the same time!

Nope :)
Why not have the doors of jannah open for me for saving already born souls from eternal jahannam? :) I think it is a bit selfish to think that people NEED to bear children. Being a mother is not giving birth to a baby, being a mother is raising, helping, loving and cherishing your child. Not many people can live up to the "mother" status.