Ads by Muslim Ad Network

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

The Two Relationship Deals

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • The Two Relationship Deals

    A scholar advised me to make two deals. One with myself & one with those whom I regularly meet in daily life, in order to avoid misunderstandings & bitterness in relationships.

    Wordings of the Deal with my colleagues/relatives/friends
    : "We all have flaws in us, please do let me know whenever any of my bad habbits/deeds (itself) becomes evident to you, I would inshaAllah try to do the same (if you don't mind)."

    Deal with myself: "Would always try finding flaws in myself and qualities in others. Be a tree, the more fruits (qualities) it has the more it is bent down (humbled) & the more people throw stones (accusations) at it (unlike fruitless trees) to snatch those fruits from it. But instead of returning thorns it returns fruits (good manners) by quietly bearing the pain of the wounds..

    Never listen to/investigate the backbittings that people do against you because that would only hurt/disturb you & you would lose concentration in work, hence serving the purpose of the accusers. Great people don't get bothered by minor low acts of anyone. They have a big heart that always forgive & doesn't let bad manners of others distract their mind from their aim.
    Last edited by Submit To Peace; 26-09-11, 03:37 PM.
    Read not to contradict and confute, not to believe and take for granted, not to find talk and discourse, but to weigh and consider. Inhale positive, exhale negative

  • #2
    Re: The Two Relationship Deals

    :jkk:
    check out this blog>>>http://myworldmuslimah.wordpress.com/

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: The Two Relationship Deals

      :jkk:

      Thats one of the hardest things in life to do. To do good those who have wronged you and bear the pain of the wounds quietly and patiently
      وَالْعَصْرِ

      إِنَّ الْإِنسَانَ لَفِي خُسْرٍ

      إِلَّا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا وَعَمِلُوا الصَّالِحَاتِ وَتَوَاصَوْا بِالْحَقِّ وَتَوَاصَوْا بِالصَّبْرِ

      "If Allah (swt) only sent this Surah to us, for the guidance of Mankind, this will be enough for us” - Imam Shaafi'ee r.a.

      "Yeh dunya daar e faani hain, Tum apna dil mat lagaon, Ganimat samaj zinadagee ki bahar, aana na hoga, yahaa baar baar......"

      Khanqah Habibiyah

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: The Two Relationship Deals

        I don't agree with this whole thing about quietly enduring abuse. We don't believe in "turn the other cheek". People who are abusive should be put in their place, otherwise they will think they can get away with being even more abusive and wont try to rectify their ways until someone stands up to them. Also the next person they're abusive towards might not be as strong or resilient to cope with that and could fall apart. I think maybe if the person is mentally ill then that person may require a bit more patience and understanding but other than that, there's no excuse for putting up with that sort of thing.
        The Lyme Disease pandemic: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5u73ME4sVU

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: The Two Relationship Deals

          ↑I understand where you're coming from, but the best thing to do is to have patience with them. I'm not saying that, but these are words of Allah and we can find countless example of this in the life of the Messenger of Allah :saw:

          “Nor can goodness and evil be equal. Repel (evil) with what is better: then will he between whom and you was hatred become as it were your friend and intimate.”(41: 34)

          “Invite [all] to the way of your Lord with wisdom and beautiful preaching; and argue with them in ways that are best and most gracious: for your Lord knows best, who have strayed from His path, and who receive guidance.” (16: 125)

          So, "put them in your place" to me sounds a bit harsh for us. Even if the person is insulting Islam, we shouldn't lose ourselves as to curse them out. As for people insulting me, I couldn't care less.
          Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

          "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
          - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: The Two Relationship Deals

            there is no reason in the world for us to seek revenge, when Allah knows the extent of our suffering.

            he is the best to deal justly.
            وَالْعَصْرِ

            إِنَّ الْإِنسَانَ لَفِي خُسْرٍ

            إِلَّا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا وَعَمِلُوا الصَّالِحَاتِ وَتَوَاصَوْا بِالْحَقِّ وَتَوَاصَوْا بِالصَّبْرِ

            "If Allah (swt) only sent this Surah to us, for the guidance of Mankind, this will be enough for us” - Imam Shaafi'ee r.a.

            "Yeh dunya daar e faani hain, Tum apna dil mat lagaon, Ganimat samaj zinadagee ki bahar, aana na hoga, yahaa baar baar......"

            Khanqah Habibiyah

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: The Two Relationship Deals

              I'm not talking about revenge- I didn't mention revenge once. I mentioned the fact that when a person endures abuse and suffers in silence, what good is that for anyone? If the abuser is Muslim then he/she is increasing in sins, if the abuser is non Muslim then the person learns that these Muslims are an easy target for abuse cos' they let us get away with it and they get even worse or more bold in their abuse. It solves nothing, everyone gets harmed in the process and it's sad that there are people who see some kind of nobility in that. Usually people who live like that end up crying as to why everyone treats them like [email protected] when they're trying to be kind to everyone.
              The Lyme Disease pandemic: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5u73ME4sVU

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: The Two Relationship Deals

                I'm not saying endure their abuses (esp. if it's physical), but you shouldn't respond in a manner that's not fit for a Muslim. In other words, we shouldn't stoop to their level in resolving issues.
                Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

                "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
                - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

                Comment

                Working...
                X