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How do i answer my fellow muslim brother...

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  • blanchoir
    replied
    Re: How do i answer my fellow muslim brother...

    Originally posted by Yunus aua View Post
    Aisha (ra) said that if the first verses to be revealed was to stop drinking alcohol and stop fornication the people would not have followed Islam. If the brother just accepted Islam and knows what he is doing is wrong and is trying to bring and end to it. Then insha'allah Allah will help him to better himself. Things like this don't come to be overnight it happens gradually for someone to come in such a situation, and same goes for the remedy it is a gradual process. Cold turkey doesn't work for 95% of the people, they usually fall back into their addiction sometimes worse than before. So it's best to keep trying and make dua
    Yes brother you just proved my point.

    thank you

    Leave a comment:


  • Yunus aua
    replied
    Re: How do i answer my fellow muslim brother...

    Aisha (ra) said that if the first verses to be revealed was to stop drinking alcohol and stop fornication the people would not have followed Islam. If the brother just accepted Islam and knows what he is doing is wrong and is trying to bring and end to it. Then insha'allah Allah will help him to better himself. Things like this don't come to be overnight it happens gradually for someone to come in such a situation, and same goes for the remedy it is a gradual process. Cold turkey doesn't work for 95% of the people, they usually fall back into their addiction sometimes worse than before. So it's best to keep trying and make dua

    Leave a comment:


  • .mirror.
    replied
    Re: How do i answer my fellow muslim brother...

    :insha:

    Tell him to seek help in Dua'a.

    May Allah make it easy for him.

    Leave a comment:


  • blanchoir
    replied
    Re: How do i answer my fellow muslim brother...

    Oh sorrys brother,

    I just saw your name in Pink for some reason I dont know why haha... sorry/..

    But brother, you also can't smoke anywhere you want, there are public areas where its not allowed which is kinda irrelevant but just wanted to point that out.

    Having regret shows you are a muslim and a follow of the prophet pbuh, becuase there are many who do commit such adultery with no regrets or even thoughts of asking for forgiveness. The brother here is constantly worried and thats why I believe allah will forgive him, and inshallah he will learn to control this filthy behaviour.

    and he is trying to stay occupied all the time and such, so he is striving which is very important in islam.

    Inshallah he will be forgiven

    Leave a comment:


  • .mirror.
    replied
    Re: How do i answer my fellow muslim brother...

    Originally posted by blanchoir View Post
    But how can you discard all of Science and Medical Issues also?

    a smoker cant SIMPLY just stop smoking, he goes through different stages sister because he is Addicted.

    An addiction is an addiction and takes alot of training and practice to stop.

    Otherwise we can just say 1 prayer and all of our addictions will vanish right away no?

    Its the same issue here. I still dont think you will understand until you have been in that persons shoes, its very different for men and women in my opinion.

    And sister... All if the most Merciful... How can you NOT expect allah swt to forgive that person?
    I'm a brother, brother. :)

    Not that I support smoking, but you can pretty much smoke anywhere. But, you can't masturbate unless you are by yourself. So, :insha: tell him to stay occupied iwth hobbies or other friends and relatives.

    By the way, did you read the quote I posted above?

    As for His forgiveness, Yes I know He will forgive him. But, you can't go commit sins having a thought in your mind that I'll ask for forgiveness later. Forgiveness means not committing that sin again. And what if he dies before repenting?

    Leave a comment:


  • blanchoir
    replied
    Re: How do i answer my fellow muslim brother...

    Originally posted by .mirror. View Post
    Brother, trust me I know what's it like living in America and being around this shameless environment, as a man! ;)

    But, what's the guarantee that he will stop if he brings it down? And even if mastubates less, he will still be sinning, right?

    :insha: He should do his best to stop it. And Allah is the Most Merciful.

    One thing that stood out was your assumption where you said: "I think for the brother to SIMPLY try and go towards Allah swt is enough that he will inshallah be forgiven."

    Forgiveness comes from asking for forgiveness, brother. How can you expect Allah to forgive someone when that person is still sinning, but just sinning less?

    Tell him to read this:



    Source

    May Allah help him.
    But how can you discard all of Science and Medical Issues also?

    a smoker cant SIMPLY just stop smoking, he goes through different stages sister because he is Addicted.

    An addiction is an addiction and takes alot of training and practice to stop.

    Otherwise we can just say 1 prayer and all of our addictions will vanish right away no?

    Its the same issue here. I still dont think you will understand until you have been in that persons shoes, its very different for men and women in my opinion.

    And sister... Allah is the most Merciful... How can you NOT expect allah swt to forgive that person? Allah once said that he will even Forgive Satan to this day if he bowed down to Adam pbuh's grave.. if Allah can forgive satan even to this day, why wouldnt forgive this muslim brother for trying to do the right thing?

    In my eyes if a christian coverts to islam its better than a THOUSAND prayers a muslim does.
    Last edited by blanchoir; 22-05-11, 07:29 AM.

    Leave a comment:


  • .mirror.
    replied
    Re: How do i answer my fellow muslim brother...

    Brother, trust me I know what's it like living in America and being around this shameless environment, as a man! ;)

    But, what's the guarantee that he will stop if he brings it down? And even if mastubates less, he will still be sinning, right?

    :insha: He should do his best to stop it. And Allah is the Most Merciful.

    One thing that stood out was your assumption where you said: "I think for the brother to SIMPLY try and go towards Allah swt is enough that he will inshallah be forgiven."

    Forgiveness comes from asking for forgiveness, brother. How can you expect Allah to forgive someone when that person is still sinning, but just sinning less?

    Tell him to read this:

    Source

    May Allah help him.

    Leave a comment:


  • blanchoir
    replied
    Re: How do i answer my fellow muslim brother...

    Originally posted by .mirror. View Post
    :wswrwb:

    How can someone pray and masturbate 4-5 times a day when every time you ejaculate you have to take a complete ghusl?

    Anyways, yes, he must stop right away, cold turkey, immediately, pronto!

    It's not that you can just masturbate. Obviously, you are in full control when you are doing it, so there' s no reason to not be able to stop.

    :insha: Tell the brother to keep himself busy with other things like hobbies and keep him in place where there are others around. Being alone is dangerous.
    Also, he needs to fear Allah as he is never alone, but Allah is be aware of everything he does.

    Tell him to make dua'a to ask help from Allah and also repent for what he has done. :insha: Allah will make it easy for him.

    May Allah forgive the brother and get rid of this from him.
    Thank you sister for the reply,

    Just like any addiction its near impossible to just STOP right away. Allah knows best, he knows truly what your intentions are, wether they are good or bad.

    The brother has accepted islam, and he is making an effort to stop. It takes many years in my opinion to fully comprehend islam and it means to be a muslim. Its easy to tell a man to JUST STOP right away, but sister once you have been in a young man's shoes in a american society filled with nudity, fornification, and adultery.. you will know how hard it is.

    I think for the brother to SIMPLY try and go towards Allah swt is enough that he will inshallah be forgiven.

    and you might have understood wrong, because the bother would do it 4-5 times a day and now hasnt done in 4-5 days, but he said he couldnt stand it and did again one time he said he showered and tried to finish his prayer.

    same thing happened to me, and it takes ALOT of self-control to not do it.

    Leave a comment:


  • .mirror.
    replied
    Re: How do i answer my fellow muslim brother...

    :wswrwb:

    How can someone pray and masturbate 4-5 times a day when every time you ejaculate you have to take a complete ghusl?

    Anyways, yes, he must stop right away, cold turkey, immediately, pronto!

    It's not that you can just masturbate. Obviously, you are in full control when you are doing it, so there' s no reason to not be able to stop.

    :insha: Tell the brother to keep himself busy with other things like hobbies and keep him in place where there are others around. Being alone is dangerous.
    Also, he needs to fear Allah as he is never alone, but Allah is be aware of everything he does.

    Tell him to make dua'a to ask help from Allah and also repent for what he has done. :insha: Allah will make it easy for him.

    May Allah forgive the brother and get rid of this from him.

    Leave a comment:


  • blanchoir
    started a topic How do i answer my fellow muslim brother...

    How do i answer my fellow muslim brother...

    Asalmu Alaikum, in the name of Allah swt most High and Merciful

    Salam brothers and sisters of islam,

    I remember having this problem and I still do today, and that is when lust takes over and people commit sinful and selfish acts upon one's self, and lets just say it involves your hands..

    I remember that this happened to myself as well so i want to know the answer.

    what if a brother in islam, young man 17-18 starts praying but has been doing this sinful act every single day 4-5 times for the past 3-4 years...? Is it expected from Allah that we stop right AWAY? I know it took me many many many tries until i got it right... and i kept showering and kept praying anyways... then i got it to the point where i can control it..

    is this haraam?

    If the brother is new to prayer and worship and is trying to reduce the act until he stops, because i know this is what i did.
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