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Is it right to be close with guy friends?

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  • Is it right to be close with guy friends?

    I can't help wondering if it's right for Muslim girls to have a close friendship (nothing more) with a guy? Most teenage girls I speak to seem to have this issue, as they don't know what's right?
    Last edited by missm; 26-04-11, 10:25 AM.

  • #2
    Re: Is it right to be close with guy friends?

    Originally posted by missm View Post
    I can't help wondering if it's right for Muslim girls to have a close friendship (nothing more) with a guy? Most teenage girls I speak to seem to have this issue, as they don't know what's right?
    No!

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    • #3
      Re: Is it right to be close with guy friends?

      .
      Last edited by Grotbags; 18-11-15, 03:13 AM.
      The Prophet SAW said, "(There are2words which R dear 2 the most gracious (Allah SWT)&very easy4the tongue2say but very heavy in the balance.They are:Subhan Allahi Wa Bihamdihi - Subhan Allahil-Azim

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      • #4
        Re: Is it right to be close with guy friends?

        Sister its not permissible is Islam to have friends of the opposite gender.

        Shaitaan will always come between "friends" and it will always lead to other haraam activities.

        Try to bear this in mind, in all your daily interactions at college/school and even on the internet.

        I know it is extremely difficult, esp. when it is considered the norm in the society in which we live, but try to keep all contact to a minimal.

        Seriously, just ignore them as much as you possibly can and just pretend they dont exist. Its the best way

        Anyway, why do you want male friends, sisters are waaay cooler :love:
        وَالْعَصْرِ

        إِنَّ الْإِنسَانَ لَفِي خُسْرٍ

        إِلَّا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا وَعَمِلُوا الصَّالِحَاتِ وَتَوَاصَوْا بِالْحَقِّ وَتَوَاصَوْا بِالصَّبْرِ

        "If Allah (swt) only sent this Surah to us, for the guidance of Mankind, this will be enough for us” - Imam Shaafi'ee r.a.

        "Yeh dunya daar e faani hain, Tum apna dil mat lagaon, Ganimat samaj zinadagee ki bahar, aana na hoga, yahaa baar baar......"

        Khanqah Habibiyah

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        • #5
          Re: Is it right to be close with guy friends?

          Don't worry, it isn't me who has the issue right now. I just know other sisters who sometimes fool around with guys, and try to justify their 'friendship'. Yeah I know, sisters are way cooler <3

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          • #6
            Re: Is it right to be close with guy friends?

            Originally posted by missm View Post
            Don't worry, it isn't me who has the issue right now. I just know other sisters who sometimes fool around with guys, and try to justify their 'friendship'. Yeah I know, sisters are way cooler <3
            guys do da same i mean justifying it.. illogical explainations they provide so i shut my mouth cuz its useless.. they do listen but dont act upon it... if u force them they call u gay!

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            • #7
              Re: Is it right to be close with guy friends?

              LOL Don't worry, I keep my thoughts to myself :')

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              • #8
                Re: Is it right to be close with guy friends?

                Salaam,

                does this also apply to the internet?
                .................................................. ............ ;)................................................ ...................................

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                • #9
                  Re: Is it right to be close with guy friends?

                  "be close with guy" in Islam - No way hosay! I know this isn't easy because in my life I've also had some guys trying to get close to me but I've always tried harder to get away from them and I have 100% success rate..I could write a book on how to put men off. I've watched some of my friends with my own eyes how they went from being good friends with a boy to best friends then to boyfriend-girlfriends...:S but I only had the courage to warn one of these friends that what they are doing is wrong and thank Allah she listened to me so stopped. I haven't said anything to anyone else because they know it is haram that's why they are keeping it a secret and they will not appreciate me advising them on their personal business - they will definitely think I'm being rude and probably won't talk to me ever again.

                  I don't mean to be rude or hurt anyone here but what I'm saying to the sisters is don't build a close friendship with any guy (real life and defo NOT over internet (safety ALARMS)) even if they seem very nice and friendly or whatever. IMO there is nothing wrong with talking about Islam, deen or study/work related things with men but keep it strictly business - don't smile a lot or joke much, look serious even if they are trying hard to make you become more friendly with them - never let your guard down...they will get the message sooner or later that it's never ever going to happen and they will most likely to move on...trying to get closer to some other poor girl...:S

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Is it right to be close with guy friends?

                    Originally posted by SimplyMuslim View Post
                    Salaam,

                    does this also apply to the internet?
                    Yes, very much.
                    Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

                    "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
                    - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Is it right to be close with guy friends?

                      Originally posted by missm View Post
                      Don't worry, it isn't me who has the issue right now. I just know other sisters who sometimes fool around with guys, and try to justify their 'friendship'. Yeah I know, sisters are way cooler <3
                      salaams to all
                      and if the boys are muslims, that does not make it a bit more permissible either.
                      just advise these sisters that they should not be doing this & if the boys they "fool" around with are muslims as well, then try to somehow advise them as well that what they are doing it haraam- maybe via email or sms. or get someone to speak to them about it.
                      it takes two to tango & if the sisters dont want to listen, insha allah the boys might realise that their fooling around is not allowed in islam and they will then keep away from these sisters.
                      also make lots of duaahh for them.

                      and Allah ta'alaknows best
                      jazakallah
                      Sufyaan Thawri "Whoever is very popular with his relations and neighbours, we suspect him to be compromising in preaching the true teachings of religion."
                      very good site for English bayaans in MP3 format-check it out- u wont be disappointed: http://www.musjidnoor.za.net/index.html & http://alhaadi.org.za/majlis-program...downloads.html

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                      • #12
                        Re: Is it right to be close with guy friends?

                        I don't think it is right to be close with guys. It's something I found a bit tough as I'm a revert. I haven't been a Muslim for very long so making sure I don't stray too much can be a difficult. But I am trying and my stepdad's strict on the issue.

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                        • #13
                          Re: Is it right to be close with guy friends?

                          No just stick to practicing sisters or yourself. And Allah(swt) is sufficient.

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                          • #14
                            Re: Is it right to be close with guy friends?

                            Originally posted by Wishing Well View Post
                            I don't think it is right to be close with guys. It's something I found a bit tough as I'm a revert. I haven't been a Muslim for very long so making sure I don't stray too much can be a difficult. But I am trying and my stepdad's strict on the issue.
                            :masha:

                            May Allah make it easy for you and keep you on the Straight Path.
                            Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

                            "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
                            - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: Is it right to be close with guy friends?

                              Originally posted by Wishing Well View Post
                              I don't think it is right to be close with guys. It's something I found a bit tough as I'm a revert. I haven't been a Muslim for very long so making sure I don't stray too much can be a difficult. But I am trying and my stepdad's strict on the issue.
                              :salams

                              Sister, this was something that all reverts have to overcome - may Allah subhana wa ta'alaa make it easy for you.

                              I well remember struggling with this myself - but the reasoning behind the ban on free mixing is so strong and straightforward that it should not be too difficult, insha'allah. There is lots of good advice available on how to stay away from non-mahrams alhumdulillah. Basically, as Muslimahs we are commanded not to interact with men unless it is absolutely necesssary, i.e. only in the course of necessary business, in which case the gaze must be lowered and we must speak in a sharp, business-like manner (I found this quite difficult at first). We must be very strict with ourselves about avoiding any small talk or chit-chat - basically give one word answers (like "fine" or "yes") to any questions like "how are you" or "what lovely weather we're having" and do not reciprocate. Remember that Shaytan is the third one present and that Allah subhana wa ta'alaa sees all and the Shariah is very clear in all matters of gender interaction alhumdulillah. Any transgressions, even something as seemingly innocent as a second glance, will weigh heavily against us in the scales subhanallah. I have found it useful to set myself a punishment for each such sin, for example 12 extra rakats nafl salah or fix an amount of Sadaqah to give to the needy. Also try to envisage the punishment awaiting in the Hereafter for sinning in this way. Above all, thank and glorify Allah subhana wa ta'alaa for providing us with His perfect guidance and protection and resolve in your heart to obey Him in this and all matters.
                              Allah is so Great and Merciful that although we continue to disobey Him, He still awaits for our repentance so that He may forgive us.

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