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In need of serious help

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  • #16
    Re: In need of serious help

    Originally posted by Aaminah82 View Post
    I don't have anyone to talk to. I have no friends, nothing.
    I am your friend and sister in Islam, message me sweety. Same for 2011.

    Remember suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

    {[hugs]}

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    • #17
      Re: In need of serious help

      get counselling......

      http://www.sakoon.co.uk/index.html <---- Islamic counselling service, they're good

      also if you're feeling really depressed, see your GP. read the "snap out of depression" thread (I don't agree with the title, because you can't just snap out of depression) but there's some good advice on the thread
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      • #18
        Re: In need of serious help

        Aminah,

        You and I are alike. I too went through this phase of zero friends, just bottled in my room and comtemplating sucide etc. I was a loser. Sounds familiar yeah? But before you want to talk to others you need to talk to yourself a bit. You need to know who you are. So I sat in my washroom and thought and thought and thought. You'll realize after your tears have dried and you've thought a little, you're a loser only because you want to be one. Yes. I'm a LOSER because I want to be a loser. I don't have friends because I don't want to have any friends. You become a real loser when you lose your decisiveness. Nothing is going to come to you in a silver plate. You gotta be assertive. Remember, worshipping Allah is the objective of your life. You weren't given life to do anything else. When you get caught up in the peripheral games you won't fulfill your purpose.

        So what do you want to do Aminah? What are you going to do tomorrow? What is your first step? Don't tell me you're confused. You're only confused if you want to be.

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        • #19
          Re: In need of serious help

          Jazak'Allah for all the advise. I've come across many judgemental sisters that has frightened me and deterred me from socialising. I've become so self-concsious, insecure and tangled in all my problems that I feel paralysed by them. People don't like unhappy people or those with problems, they want to be around happy and confident people and I unfortunately am not the latter.

          I feel drained of energy and everything around me irritates me. Everyone at home is just busy with their lives and my parents are way too wrapped up in their own problems. They'd rather wish I stayed in bed all day so that they wouldnt have to see my face and to be honest I don't blame them. I feel useless and I cannot think of a more apt adjective to describe me... useless. I've often been reminded that 'what use is your existence' and I honestly have no answer.

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          • #20
            Re: In need of serious help

            Thank you 'loonietoonie' sis, so what did you do then? and are you better now?

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            • #21
              Re: In need of serious help

              Jzk Dhakiyya. I will visit that site and read the messages posted to that thread.

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              • #22
                Re: In need of serious help

                Originally posted by Aaminah82 View Post
                Jazak'Allah for all the advise. I've come across many judgemental sisters that has frightened me and deterred me from socialising. I've become so self-concsious, insecure and tangled in all my problems that I feel paralysed by them. People don't like unhappy people or those with problems, they want to be around happy and confident people and I unfortunately am not the latter.

                I feel drained of energy and everything around me irritates me. Everyone at home is just busy with their lives and my parents are way too wrapped up in their own problems. They'd rather wish I stayed in bed all day so that they wouldnt have to see my face and to be honest I don't blame them. I feel useless and I cannot think of a more apt adjective to describe me... useless. I've often been reminded that 'what use is your existence' and I honestly have no answer.
                you are better than the sisters who made you feel so bad about yourself, or anyone who's said horrible things to you like "what use is your existance" - how dare people talk to my sister in Islam like that!! Everyone is important. People have made you believe that there's nothing good about you..... but it's not true. If you're finding it hard to see anything good about yourself, then maybe counselling will help you see past all the negativity that others have put upon you, and see that you're a good person mashaAllah, and that you can do stuff and succeed inshaAllah :up:

                It's not true that people don't like others with problems, you've just met the wrong people. True friends like you for who you are and want to help you with your problems. even if you have no true friends now, perhaps because you've ended up surrounded by negative people, or because you've been too afraid to go out and find them........ but you can have true friends in the future inshaAllah. learn to choose your friends wisely, when you find good, kind hearted people, stick with them. avoid shallow and insincere people, avoid those who gossip.

                And ask Allah to help you because there's no help in anything without Allah :up:
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                • #23
                  Re: In need of serious help

                  Originally posted by Aaminah82 View Post
                  Thank you 'loonietoonie' sis, so what did you do then? and are you better now?
                  I stopped expecting anything from anyone except Allah. When you put faith in human beings you will be let down every once in a while. That's the human nature. But faith in Allah is a deal that is only profitable. The Qur'an speaks to me. It's my semi-animate friend. It has a personality. I gave myself goals Aminah. Things I know I can accomplish. Things which I could use other peoples help but if they declined no worries I don't mind doing it solo because I had no expectation of help to begin with. It feels so good when you shave off this expectation nonsense. No one can let me down, but myself. Alhamdulilah I'm much better and you are most welcome. You have it in you Aminah. Right now you're going through that self-pity phase. But the hardest part will be over and I know you'll gather up the pieces and move on.

                  Answer the question Aaminah, what use is your existence? You need to answer this, but you won't find the answer readily in your mind. You'll need create the answer.
                  I asked myself exactly that. What good am I? I discovered...I'm not insane. I'm not devoid of resources. I'm not disabled. I might be a lil fat but that's ok. So I thought about what I can do to fill my time on earth and I found it. I created the answer. You see under my username, "defender of Islam". I cannot tolerate people throwing dirt at the Prophet Muhammad pbuh. So I decided for the rest of my life I am going to engage in the intellectual defense of Islam and I've started some projects made lots of short term goals and the ball now is rolling.

                  What do you want to do Aaminah? What are your interests and how you can profit from them in this life and the hereafter? Jannah is so beautiful. No one can hurt us there, and we'll be happy forever and ever. But first things first....gotta get through this life.

                  I see that you've made a friend already in your profile. That's pretty good. Not even 8 posts in and others have request you to talk to them in pm. Things are already progressing. Good for you.

                  I'm a brother btw.

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                  • #24
                    Re: In need of serious help

                    I highly recommend counseling. Counseling is a great way to help any issues you may have. If you want to talk it through I'm here. (Although I am male and I know some Muslims don't think males and females should privately chat, just figured I'd alert you in case you thought that way.)

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                    • #25
                      Re: In need of serious help

                      Sister, you need to attach youself more to Allah, because shaytan pulls us towards depression. When we are depressed we become thankless, pessimistic and we can do no good to ourselves, nor to someone else. Say astaghfirullah 100 times whenever you feel sad. You will notice a difference when you have completed saying this, without stopping or getting distracted, thus forgetting to complete it.

                      YOu might read my booklet from the following link which is about patience and tawakkal. May Allah ease your worries,

                      http://www.scribd.com/doc/26657725/P...-and-Istikhara
                      [103:003] Except those who believe and do righteous good deeds, and recommend one another to the truth, and recommend one another to patience

                      My blog link: [url]http://beliefinunseen.blogspot.com/[/url]

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                      • #26
                        Re: In need of serious help

                        Originally posted by anistop View Post
                        Sister, you need to attach youself more to Allah, because shaytan pulls us towards depression. When we are depressed we become thankless, pessimistic and we can do no good to ourselves, nor to someone else. Say astaghfirullah 100 times whenever you feel sad. You will notice a difference when you have completed saying this, without stopping or getting distracted, thus forgetting to complete it.

                        YOu might read my booklet from the following link which is about patience and tawakkal. May Allah ease your worries,

                        http://www.scribd.com/doc/26657725/P...-and-Istikhara
                        :salams

                        :jkk: for the link

                        :wswrwb:
                        La Ilaha Illa Anta, subhanaka, Inni Kunto Minal dhalimeen.(Al Anbiya 21:87) Nabi(SAW)said'None who is experiencing difficulty employs it except that Allah would relieve him of his difficulty'

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