Ads by Muslim Ad Network

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Religion And Love....

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Religion And Love....

    Asalamu Alekum,

    I kinda need some ideas on this thread. Im sure anyone around teenage age has probably encountered this and I really need some ideas here.

    In order to understand, let me tell you a little about myself:
    Im currently a American Muslim (I was bored in the USA while my parents were born in Syria) currently attending an Islamic High school and things right now are going bad....

    Throughout most of my life, ive encountered one major problem, "Religion and Love"
    As you know, America is the #1 place for anything and one of its famous thing is Love, both true love and, unfortunately, plain love (i call it fake love)

    The reason why im turning to this place is there is no one to talk to about this. Its my first year in an Islamic High school but my class looks like the opposite. Only thing i see islamic is that girls are covered, boys site on 1 side of the classroom while girls site on the other, and we have arabic, quran, and islamic studies class. Yet, all the boys fool around, talking about loving this girl and that, looking popular, and etc.... (Its pretty much only my class, all the other classes are good :/) (Yet, even though its an Islamic School, my public school filled with non-muslims act WAY MUCH BETTER AND MORE BEHAVED then what im with now)

    Im kinda in love but i only want to be good friends with them. Yes, i talk to girls and hang out with them BUT NEVER DATE OR KISS THEM!
    My spirit in Islam is high (unlike most of the kids) and the only thing is sometimes write poems about her (but actually never gave it to her)

    My school is the last thing i would ask for help, including my friends in them.

    So, what does a muslim do in this case?

  • #2
    Re: Religion And Love....

    :wswrwb:
    Bro, that's good you think all of the things these boys are doing is wrong. That's a very unusual Islamic school. What are the teachers doing?

    Anyways, you should try and stay as far away from girls as possible. No, you cannot even be friends with girls. It's not allowed.
    It's expected of you to be inclined to girls, but you have to fight the desires for the sake of Allah.

    Stop writing poems for her, please. Spend your time in a nasjid with pious brothers, so you can get some positive influence from them :insha:

    May Allah make it easy for you.
    Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

    "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
    - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Religion And Love....

      What do you mean by in love? How do you know you're in love?
      May we reach daruSalaam by His, and only His Decree
      I would die for the cause if I knew only to what degree
      *
      My Blog

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Religion And Love....

        Brother it can all start with a simple poem and take off from there. You need to becareful in the school you are attending and make sure you keep away from the haram.
        Brother keep your manners in place and it is good you are asking for help here too and seeking knowledge MashaAllah
        But if you are interested in this girl the maybe have your wali talk to her parents and see what happens. But I don't know your situation either and I don't know when you are allowed to get married too.
        But right now, focus on your studies because that will be your future aswell. I am doing that now too and trying to focus on my studies first. It is hard but you get used to it.

        Also maybe try to hang around the pious brothers InshaAllah. May Allah make it easy for you, Ameen.

        The Prophet (saw) said, Verily, the knots of Islam will be undone one by one. Whenever one knot is lost, then the people grabbed onto the one which came after it. The first of these knots will be ruling and the last will be the salah.[1]

        The author of Sitoon as-Sultaniyah says about this Hadith: “It was the Prophet who tied together the knots of Islam, including the uppermost knot of ruling after he established the Islamic state…As mentioned by Imam Mawardi the leadership has been proscribed as the succession of the Prophet in protecting the deen and governing the societal affairs. In this respect – Imam Baidawi mentioned that the Imama/Khalifah is the succession from the Prophet in the establishment of the laws of the Shari’ah. So without the Imam the laws lie unapplied and the territory is not protected effectively. The hadith indicates that it is the uppermost knot that keeps the subsequent knots safe from being untied. This is since it is the ruler that is responsible to apply Islam in its entirety, to implement the limits proscribed by Allah and to protect the society. Imam Ahmed mentioned without an Imam (for the Muslims as their leader) there would be fitna, and the destruction of the symbols of Islam ending with the Prayer is a great fitna.[2]




        [1] Tabarani, Musnad Ahmad and Al Hakim in his Al Mustadrak
        [2] Ibid. pg. 46

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Religion And Love....

          The teachers try their best, its not a bad Islamic School, somehow, i just ended up in the wrong class.
          I found this forum because we had a packet and one of the posts my teacher copied so im not giving away who i am as i dont want my teachers seeing it.

          My desires is with Allah and will always be, my heart is strong with Allah. You may see me looking like any average american but once you get to know me, i care about my religion. .mirror, i understand where you are going but the post you pointed is like any other teacher, i was looking for something similer but with reason. Sadly, i dont have much good brothers to be with except 1.

          As for not being friends with em, its pretty hard. Im mostly around boys almost all the time and and the only time where i hang out with a girl is when they come to my house (visiters)

          Remember, the USA is a place where religion is the last thing people question about, its not easy to say "Im sorry, i cannot be friends with you because you are a girl"

          Trust me, ive had people coming up to me saying, "Hey! do this and ill hook you up with the hottest girls here" but i just keep my mouth shut and try to change the situation.
          Im trying to keep balance so i can still follow my religion and not look totally like someone no one wants to talk to.

          Also, im not trying to start a debate, your reasoning is strong and it seems you may have some knowledge, its just that you probably dont know "what side to stand and look at"

          Originally posted by zammy View Post
          What do you mean by in love? How do you know you're in love?
          I think once your in love, you can pretty much feel it within inside you


          Originally posted by adri View Post
          Brother it can all start with a simple poem and take off from there. You need to becareful in the school you are attending and make sure you keep away from the haram.
          Brother keep your manners in place and it is good you are asking for help here too and seeking knowledge MashaAllah
          But if you are interested in this girl the maybe have your wali talk to her parents and see what happens. But I don't know your situation either and I don't know when you are allowed to get married too.
          But right now, focus on your studies because that will be your future aswell. I am doing that now too and trying to focus on my studies first. It is hard but you get used to it.

          Also maybe try to hang around the pious brothers InshaAllah. May Allah make it easy for you, Ameen.
          Im trying to keep away from her and try not to trust anyone from my school. When i asked my Islamic Studies teacher about this school, he did say its a good religious school (which i see) but its just i ended up with the wrong class :/

          As of talking to her parents, NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. Unfortunately, shyness is taking over but that could be a sign from Allah telling me to stop where I am and not go any further. Im currently with my studies but im just seeking advice because i feel stuck.

          May allah guide me and everyone else
          Last edited by TezzSun; 24-02-11, 02:59 AM.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Religion And Love....

            Can't you switch classes?
            Get a note from your parents or just tell the dean that it's affecting your studies.
            Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

            "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
            - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Religion And Love....

              Originally posted by .mirror. View Post
              Can't you switch classes?
              Get a note from your parents or just tell the dean that it's affecting your studies.
              I cant, its a small school and there are two types of classes. Honours and Regulars.
              Like Honors math, regular math, etc....

              Im in all regulars because they dont put anyone new in honor classes but inshallah that i will go to some honour classes next year.

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Religion And Love....

                :insha: Just do you best and keep away from girls and especially these no-good boys.

                You should seriously bring this issue up with your teacher(s) and/or the principal. It's an Islamic school and they should take action.

                Originally posted by TezzSun View Post
                I think once your in love, you can pretty much feel it within inside you
                That's infatuation, brother.
                Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

                "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
                - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Religion And Love....

                  This is what you do akhi: You fear Allah. MashaAllah you're already doing a great job so just continue the way you are going (minus the poems, that doesn't help with the emotions). Ok so you like/love a girl. And you say there's no way you will approach her parents. That's fine, just continue on with your life like normal. Ignore the people around you doing bad things and try to keep uninvolved. There's a way to stay out of trouble and be respectable among your peers in high school. Believe it or not, people have more respect for you when you stick close to your deen because you are exemplary in every way and don't make a fool of yourself. America or not, you are who you are. InshaAllah things work out in your favour in your new school. May Allah keep you safe from fitnah.
                  May we reach daruSalaam by His, and only His Decree
                  I would die for the cause if I knew only to what degree
                  *
                  My Blog

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Religion And Love....

                    Originally posted by .mirror. View Post
                    That's infatuation, brother.
                    True... it could be.
                    America is one of the countries that destroyed real love and now all we see these days is even teenagers around the age of 10 kissing saying that they are "in love"
                    Its sad and unfortunate but i guess this is just one way allah is going to test us....

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Religion And Love....

                      Wa'alaykum As-Salaam,

                      Firstly, Masha-Allah, at least you realise that all this is wrong.

                      It's clear you know what you should be doing, now it's a matter of you doing those things. You say you know that hanging around with these girls (regardless of if this is at home or at school) is wrong, and that writing this particular girl poems isn't helping, so you need to stop these things ASAP. Believe me, you've managed the first step perfectly; you're not contesting that they're wrong. Of course it will be hard, but in taking a step towards Allah, you know that from here on, it will get easier, Insha-Allah.

                      What .mirror. said in trying to surround yourself with good brothers is very good advice, and this really should help. Even if you can't find good brothers to hang around with all the time, you can try talking with them about Islam (after all, you attend an Islamic school), and doing Dhikrullah on top of your Salaah - I find that if you're constantly thinking about Allah, you automatically think about whether something is right or wrong before you do it and whether it is worth it. So for example, you talking to these girls - is it worth displeasing Allah? Once you get yourself to think "I'm going to STOP", and then actually just stop, it gets easier... If you need to, you can explain to your friends that what you're all doing is wrong and that you want to stop - you can tell them they should, too. Insha-Allah, they heed your advice and maybe you'll have a couple of friends to help you, too.

                      The last thing I'm going to add may seem mean, but hey, whatever helps you... You need to stop making excuses for yourself, it doesn't matter what America's like or what other Muslims are doing, this is about you and you refraining from acts which are haraam and displease Allah. It is between you and Allah, forget everyone else. You clearly seem like you don't like what you're doing, so why not change that?
                      Ya Muqallib al-Quloob, thabbit qalbi 'alaa Deenik
                      O' Converter of Hearts, make my heart steadfast upon Thy Way
                      We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Religion And Love....

                        Originally posted by Safiya View Post
                        Wa'alaykum As-Salaam,

                        Firstly, Masha-Allah, at least you realise that all this is wrong.

                        It's clear you know what you should be doing, now it's a matter of you doing those things. You say you know that hanging around with these girls (regardless of if this is at home or at school) is wrong, and that writing this particular girl poems isn't helping, so you need to stop these things ASAP. Believe me, you've managed the first step perfectly; you're not contesting that they're wrong. Of course it will be hard, but in taking a step towards Allah, you know that from here on, it will get easier, Insha-Allah.

                        What .mirror. said in trying to surround yourself with good brothers is very good advice, and this really should help. Even if you can't find good brothers to hang around with all the time, you can try talking with them about Islam (after all, you attend an Islamic school), and doing Dhikrullah on top of your Salaah - I find that if you're constantly thinking about Allah, you automatically think about whether something is right or wrong before you do it and whether it is worth it. So for example, you talking to these girls - is it worth displeasing Allah? Once you get yourself to think "I'm going to STOP", and then actually just stop, it gets easier... If you need to, you can explain to your friends that what you're all doing is wrong and that you want to stop - you can tell them they should, too. Insha-Allah, they heed your advice and maybe you'll have a couple of friends to help you, too.

                        The last thing I'm going to add may seem mean, but hey, whatever helps you... You need to stop making excuses for yourself, it doesn't matter what America's like or what other Muslims are doing, this is about you and you refraining from acts which are haraam and displease Allah. It is between you and Allah, forget everyone else. You clearly seem like you don't like what you're doing, so why not change that?
                        Really better advice coming now... thanks alot!
                        I dont approach to talk, if they just start talking, i just start talking too till its over and thankfully, its nothing bad like i just ask how they are and stuff. I know what you mean by "America or not," ive already seen the american lifestyle. Ive only wrote 2 poems and its the last 2 ill write. To be honest, i shouldve said "like" and not "love" as i see there is a BIG difference between them.

                        Ill see what goes on.... as there is alot of challenges...
                        I just wish my class atleast was better....

                        Comment

                        Working...
                        X