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Does this happen to you? Any solutions???

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  • #16
    Re: Does this happen to you? Any solutions???

    with the shivering it sounds like a andrenalin dump. do you feel like theyre talking about stuff like 9/11 and maybe blameing you in some way because your a muslim? subconsiously you could be gearing up for a fight if you belive your getting the blame for something you never done.

    There are two kinds of pride, both good and bad. 'Good pride' represents our dignity and self-respect. 'Bad pride' is the deadly sin of superiority that reeks of conceit and arrogance.


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    • #17
      Re: Does this happen to you? Any solutions???

      its called cold feet. it happens when you hae a mix of fear and adrenaline.

      the best thing is to speak up. say somthing. the cold adrenaline will become warm and you will feel your veins pop out. you mind will be much sharper once you "break the ice" because now your involved so you gotta see this one to the end.

      cold feet happens to everybody. think i dont get cold feet when i talk about shariah and the taliban to people face to face? course i do, but once you start talking things just flow, and that cold jittery feeling is turned into a warm kind of "fight back" type of response.

      its what scientists cal lthe "fight or flight" survival mechanisim. as a muslim you fear being persecuted. as silues sead, your subconsiously gearing up for a physical altercation with a possible enemy. you also probably feel abit defensive and hurt or fearfull or helpless because you feel that maybe you cant stand up to them. the coldness usually is a flight reponse. thewarm response i was talking about is a fight reponse. you cant help the jitters though. that will happn.

      and it dosent stop untill you get used to the adrenaine rushes. if you take part in these debats, within a few days its old news to your body and there no adranaline rush anymore.
      painful torment? (10) (If you do so) He will forgive you your sins, and admit you into Gardens under which rivers flow, and pleasant dwellings in Adn (Edn) Paradise; that is indeed the great success. (12)

      JazakAllah khair for the duas but i would prefer duas for shahadah instead.

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      • #18
        Re: Does this happen to you? Any solutions???

        i remember in my jahil days me and the gang would go meet up at a place where we were gonna scrap it out. how it worked it was first a one on one between one guy from each group, then after somone lost in that fight, it became a big gang brawl.

        anyways i drew the short straw that day. so i stepped into the circle against this huge monster of a guy must have had 5 inches on me and at least 60 pounds. i thoust i was gonna get beat good. i got cold feet and that jittery feeling. but then a thought occured to me: well i aint got nowhere to run, so i might as well just go phyco or somthing and do my best. then that cold feeling turned into that warm feeling i was talking about.

        anyways thats how i learned about how to control adrenaline rushes.
        painful torment? (10) (If you do so) He will forgive you your sins, and admit you into Gardens under which rivers flow, and pleasant dwellings in Adn (Edn) Paradise; that is indeed the great success. (12)

        JazakAllah khair for the duas but i would prefer duas for shahadah instead.

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        • #19
          Re: Does this happen to you? Any solutions???

          no, i never get cold feet when debating about Islam. but back in the days i used to get defensive. everytime someone says something about Islam, i used to jump, didnt even let them finish. God knows maybe they were gona say something good about Islam, i just jump in and defend the religion. but later as i gew older i realised this isnt the way to handle the situation. first let the finish the sentence lol, then answer them in such a way that is simple, to the point and memrable. it work!!! :up:

          but i get what you get when i have to do presentations :(

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          • #20
            Re: Does this happen to you? Any solutions???

            Originally posted by IbnulQayyim View Post
            I try to be calm and wow i couldnt even hold a paper properly today haha and lol my ipod fell from my pocket whilst i took participation in the discussion but can u believe it the teacher wudnt believe 9/11 was amreekan conspiracy. he says al qaida did it (wow eh)
            If the war on terror was done against ur teacher, he would of probably believed that 9/11 was an inside job.
            "And swell not thy cheek (for pride) at men, nor walk in insolence through the earth; for Allah loveth not any arrogant boaster. Surah Luqman:18

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            • #21
              Re: Does this happen to you? Any solutions???

              I used to be in similar kind of situation like 5 years back, this was this english teacher who used to have hair from ears and eyebrows.This man used to come from wherever he is discussing and end up saying bad about islam.

              I ignored him for few seconds, then later he was removed from the job.Don't know the reason behind, so i guess again the patience paid me the best buy.

              I advice you the same.:)
              صلى الله على حبيبه محمد و على آله و أصحابه و سلم
              Al-Muslimeen

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              • #22
                Re: Does this happen to you? Any solutions???

                Try to do extra reading prior to your lesson, find out what your topic is and read up on it and get as much info as you can, thinking of possible critical comments that people could make and how it can be answered, for eg, by quoting the correct aayah/hadeeth/terminology/commentary etc
                itd be good to make notes whilst doing this, so you have the accurate info written down with references if someone would later like to verify it.
                That is a method that a lot of students would use, hence they will have Google'd particular terms and come and use it as part of class discussions without knowing the full context of the situation.

                We have that a lot in my Religion classes, when the Christians are arguing/debating amongst themselves, its good to pick up on their methods, like they will let one person finish their point but next second refute it with something credible in their opinion and the like.

                Im not a fan of speaking out too much in class, but i remember last year i felt i would have to do so cus of the topic in question being related to Islamic practise, so i found all the correct info from fataawa and was ready to blast anyone who would say summat wrong about the whole thing :p and although the lecturer herself was slightly confused when delivering the whole topic, a couple of the non-Muslims were defending it and it was actually a Muslim sis who was giving the wrong info when attempting to clarify it, by distancing it from Islam and thats when i had to step in and give the hadeeth references, but i was really nervous and could feel myself going all red as everyone looked at me
                alhamdulillah, it worked out so much better cus the lecturer was so grateful as she now understood the whole thing.

                give it a few attempts and inshaa'Allah it will be easier in the long run and you'll gain more confidence. oh and if it does happen that someone says something and you dont have an answer, or they refer to an aspect of Islam which you have never heard of and using it to their own advantage then just say politely that you will find out more info from a qualified academic of Islam and let them know next time.

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                • #23
                  Re: Does this happen to you? Any solutions???

                  what usually happens to me is that when i get put on the spot.. i can answer nicely but after i usually think.. 'i shuda said this!!'

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                  • #24
                    Re: Does this happen to you? Any solutions???

                    I think when talking about islam it is easy to get quite defensive because of all the hate out there. But just remember some who question may be genuinely curious and lack a bit of knowledge. Once you clear things up they understand, and pretty much all the time it comes back down to being misinformed. In cases where u think the person just lacks knowledge its probably best not to be defensive.
                    Patience...

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                    • #25
                      Re: Does this happen to you? Any solutions???

                      normally i use the laughter to hide anger/nervousness/ outrage teqhnique (albeit it is mostly with my mum) and i laugh and smile while i am saying stuff to make sure i am saying it gently and in a friendly non condoscending non threatening manner

                      Recipes for all the family :inlove:
                      (and you thought I was a lazy feminazi which can't cook?)

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                      • #26
                        Re: Does this happen to you? Any solutions???

                        Originally posted by Al-hayaa View Post
                        :wswrwb:

                        educate yourself on deen

                        DON't be scared to speak up Haqq

                        :insha:
                        I know... so true

                        Originally posted by MoMo_- View Post
                        or this. never be scared of the kaffirs. They dont even know their own religon trust me. I had comparative religon in High School and all the christians their had no knowledge, even bout their own religon. Their only answer to every question was, Jesus.
                        .
                        I agree
                        Originally posted by .mirror. View Post
                        We love and respect Jesus (AS) more than they do. They're so lost.
                        Allah please guide them.
                        I know they are so lost mmann
                        Originally posted by SILURES View Post
                        with the shivering it sounds like a andrenalin dump. do you feel like theyre talking about stuff like 9/11 and maybe blameing you in some way because your a muslim?
                        Don't know abt the fight thing but abt the blaming' for sure.

                        Originally posted by uncle umar View Post
                        its called cold feet. it happens when you hae a mix of fear and adrenaline.
                        interesting...
                        Originally posted by uncle umar View Post
                        well i aint got nowhere to run, so i might as well just go phyco or somthing and do my best. then that cold feeling turned into that warm feeling i was talking about.
                        sooo canadian !!
                        Originally posted by Bint-Al-Islam View Post


                        but i get what you get when i have to do presentations :(
                        i noe right! i forget what i want to say too so my presentations are so stoopid!

                        Originally posted by Abu Suhayb View Post
                        If the war on terror was done against ur teacher, he would of probably believed that 9/11 was an inside job.
                        I noe right!

                        Originally posted by urban rose View Post
                        so i found all the correct info from fataawa and was ready to blast anyone who would say summat wrong
                        my memory stinks. i always have to use 'i think its this' even if i read it

                        Originally posted by zaidfp View Post
                        what usually happens to me is that when i get put on the spot.. i can answer nicely but after i usually think.. 'i shuda said this!!'
                        sameee!

                        Originally posted by Rouz View Post
                        I think when talking about islam it is easy to get quite defensive because of all the hate out there.
                        exactly.

                        Originally posted by naila-k View Post
                        normally i use the laughter to hide anger/nervousness/ outrage teqhnique (albeit it is mostly with my mum) and i laugh and smile while i am saying stuff to make sure i am saying it gently and in a friendly non condoscending non threatening manner
                        i llack maturity (lol). and well im not close to anyone in mmy life lol so yh idk anything
                        Reported by Ibn al-Salah:

                        ولقد أحسن الحسن بن أبي زياد اللؤلؤي صاحب أبي حنيفة فيما بلغنا عنه أنه استفتي في مسألة فأخطأ فيها ولم يعرف الذي أفتاه فاكترى مناديا فنادى أن الحسن بن أبي زياد استفتي يوم كذا وكذا في مسألة فأخطأ فمن كان أفتاه الحسن بن أبي زياد بشيء فليرجع إليه
                        فلبث أياما لا يفتي حتى وجد صاحب الفتوى فأعلمه أنه أخطأ وإن الصواب كذا وكذا والله أعلم

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