I am a girl, middle child and in my early twenties... My parents are both professionals, although dad has since retired not too long ago.
Due to unforeseen circumstances and unimpressive grades I did not further my studies, much to the disappointment of my parents. I started to work really young - 18 of age - from clerk and now has since found an executive level job in a good multinational corporation. I learnt very early to fend for myself and hardly ever asking money from parents. I thought that they would appreciate that they have one less financial burden but very often, I find myself needing to contribute... more and more.
I have always helped them whenever I could and tried to contribute monthly and give extra whenever there is surplus of funds. But, being a girl, I too have needs.
But at home, the tension is growing. My father is pushing for me to buy the family a house. Although I earn okay, I am setting aside fund for my part time studies and I do not want to jeopardize my ability to fulfill other obligations. I haven't thought of committing to such a huge purchase. Besides, I am still serving my car loan.
Despite the money that I give monthly, on and off I am receiving requests to chip in here and there, 2k to help granddad, 500 to help mom to get by and it drives me insane because I can't afford it. I know they say they would pay me back but the guilt is driving me crazy. I feel guilty for not having enough to give them.
I kept telling myself if only I had spent less then maybe I would be able to help. But then again, I too have necessities that need to be taken off. Don't I have the right to the money that I work for? I am so torn. Yesterday my parents say they would need about 22.5k to settle some dues & were wondering if I could take personal loan of 30k to help them out. They say they would pay back but looking at their track records - I have a feeling I would have to serve this loan too.
Sometimes I wonder if they don't think I should be saving up for my future. For my own family. To buy my own house?
My question is, in our religion - is there any boundary when it comes to honoring one's parents? I highlighted that my dad was working in professional line & so is my mom to emphasize that they were educated but could have made some bad financial decision while raising us up. I would love to help but not at my own expense... If this sounds so selfish I seek for forgiveness from Him.
I would appreciate if any reader would be able to refer me to some further readings on this topic. All advice would be treasured.
Due to unforeseen circumstances and unimpressive grades I did not further my studies, much to the disappointment of my parents. I started to work really young - 18 of age - from clerk and now has since found an executive level job in a good multinational corporation. I learnt very early to fend for myself and hardly ever asking money from parents. I thought that they would appreciate that they have one less financial burden but very often, I find myself needing to contribute... more and more.
I have always helped them whenever I could and tried to contribute monthly and give extra whenever there is surplus of funds. But, being a girl, I too have needs.
But at home, the tension is growing. My father is pushing for me to buy the family a house. Although I earn okay, I am setting aside fund for my part time studies and I do not want to jeopardize my ability to fulfill other obligations. I haven't thought of committing to such a huge purchase. Besides, I am still serving my car loan.
Despite the money that I give monthly, on and off I am receiving requests to chip in here and there, 2k to help granddad, 500 to help mom to get by and it drives me insane because I can't afford it. I know they say they would pay me back but the guilt is driving me crazy. I feel guilty for not having enough to give them.
I kept telling myself if only I had spent less then maybe I would be able to help. But then again, I too have necessities that need to be taken off. Don't I have the right to the money that I work for? I am so torn. Yesterday my parents say they would need about 22.5k to settle some dues & were wondering if I could take personal loan of 30k to help them out. They say they would pay back but looking at their track records - I have a feeling I would have to serve this loan too.
Sometimes I wonder if they don't think I should be saving up for my future. For my own family. To buy my own house?
My question is, in our religion - is there any boundary when it comes to honoring one's parents? I highlighted that my dad was working in professional line & so is my mom to emphasize that they were educated but could have made some bad financial decision while raising us up. I would love to help but not at my own expense... If this sounds so selfish I seek for forgiveness from Him.
I would appreciate if any reader would be able to refer me to some further readings on this topic. All advice would be treasured.
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