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  • Not a working gIRL

    Aslam O alaikum,

    i did a degree a couple of yrs back, and decided work was not for me just yet, and i was amazed by sum ppl reaction to this they couldnt believe it. Since then i have worked once but left and am currently looking for a new job. The thing that is grating me is that everytime i c an aunty they will ask me wat i do....n it is doin my nut in....wen i say im not doing nething they look at me like wat a waste......since wen did it become necessary for a girl to be working? have the roles of men and women changed that mcuh, that a girl now should also HAVE to work among many other things??? Normally im not bothered about being unemployed, i know one day i will find a job inshallah, but wat gets me down is the look on other peoples faces...i know i shouldnt care....but it still affcets me from time to time....ne advice!?

  • #2
    Re: Not a working gIRL

    Originally posted by Thinkthenspeak View Post
    Aslam O alaikum,

    i did a degree a couple of yrs back, and decided work was not for me just yet, and i was amazed by sum ppl reaction to this they couldnt believe it. Since then i have worked once but left and am currently looking for a new job. The thing that is grating me is that everytime i c an aunty they will ask me wat i do....n it is doin my nut in....wen i say im not doing nething they look at me like wat a waste......since wen did it become necessary for a girl to be working? have the roles of men and women changed that mcuh, that a girl now should also HAVE to work among many other things??? Normally im not bothered about being unemployed, i know one day i will find a job inshallah, but wat gets me down is the look on other peoples faces...i know i shouldnt care....but it still affcets me from time to time....ne advice!?
    i have also completed a degree but i dont work and havent done so since i came into islam so for around 4 years.

    alhumduililah i dont need to work, gosh i hate the thought of having to work 9am-5pm - forget that!
    i'm just concentrating on my arabic/tajwid and islamic studies inshallah
    Last edited by taqwa435; 11-03-10, 10:59 PM.

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    • #3
      Re: Not a working gIRL

      u dont get ne funny looks? ur so lucky!

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      • #4
        Re: Not a working gIRL

        Originally posted by Thinkthenspeak View Post
        u dont get ne funny looks? ur so lucky!
        nope, everyone knows i am more islamically inclined hence i would rather
        increase my knowledge et al plus alhamdulilah my parents are financially secure so we have no
        mopney issues.

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        • #5
          Re: Not a working gIRL

          just ignore them sis
          i have a degree too and never worked @ all (well i used 2 work few hours in a shop, but not ne work that actually needed the degree) i didnt really get ne weird looks for it @ all?
          like the other sis said just concentrate on studying tajweed arabic etc then if the aunties ask cant u just tell them u do that, rather than say "nothing" they might get an image of u sat down all day doing actually nothing whereas im sure although not working, u woudnt really b doing "nothing" at all?
          .: Rufaida :.
          .:Fa Firroo Ila-llaah:.
          http://s61.photobucket.com/albums/h6...th_Silence.jpg
          “People praise you for what they suppose is in you,
          but you must blame your soul for what you know is in you.”
          ~ Ibn Atallah

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          • #6
            Re: Not a working gIRL

            :salams,

            I get the "looks" for working! lol

            Especially if you're working at a supermarket, you always get the odd uncle jee huffing and puffing, muttering "Astaghfirullah" at the site of seeing you working there, making you feel extremley uncomfortable, as they make you feel like you shouldn't be there! And then there's the bunch of Auntie jee's who start pointing at where you are, very obviously, either saying 'masha'Allah' if they're in a good mood , or are just stood thier whispering tutting away blaming your parents and what not..some even have the nerve to look at you in pity

            And then there's poeple who love to critisize you anyway, when you're doing what you're there for i.e. WORK! they come up to you and make conversation to assess how stupid you are..especially when you're sweeping up or something..there are even people who come and tell you, that "you shouldn't be wearing such a big scarf/skirt, awwww poor lass you're gonna get your self hurt/ill etc" or "I bet you're hot in that!" when they can see that you're clearly capable of working, and doing the things that you're required to in the way that you are!

            So to be honest sis, it isn't anybodies business what you do or what you intend to do! Some poeple will always have something to say regardless of what you do just ignore them sis, or turn a blind eye as they say..you know what you're own circumstances/preferences are..and you don't have to explain yourself to anyone else. Just let the ppl be , trust me its the best way you can avoid it affecting your mental health!

            I've just let out some steam
            :love:"And whosoever is conscious of Allah, He will make a way for him to get out (from every difficulty). And He will provide him from (sources) he never could imagine. And whoever puts his trust in Allah, then He will suffice him. Verily, Allah will accomplish His purpose. Indeed Allah has sent a measure for all things." (Quran: 65/2-3)

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            • #7
              Re: Not a working gIRL

              i dont care even if aunties gave me looks, its not like im eating from their money or it should make a difference to them if im working or not

              *rolls eyes at aunties*

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              • #8
                Re: Not a working gIRL

                assalamu alaykum sister

                sister, insha Allah i graduate this year and people always ask me what i am going to do afterwards, when i say nothing they look at me like im mad lol, subhan'Allah. It doesnt help that ive been the ideal A student so they think im wasting my life but subhan'Allah i cant be dealing with working and education any longer. i cant wait till i finish uni, insha Allah ill be chilling! ( actually not chilling im going to go to learn arabic for three years insha Allah) but you know what sister, forget what people say, we cant make everyone happy. thats why i am in the mess i am in today, i tried making people happy and i ended up at uni doing a course which i hate and having to wake up so early in the morning to get to uni on time!

                if they give you looks, just say, alhumdu'lillah, i have a degree if i wanted a job i could get one, but i dont, so i wont.
                Last edited by sis_on_sunnah; 13-03-10, 02:29 AM. Reason: rude
                http://www.deenulhuq.wordpress.com

                Don't depend on anyone too much in this world because even your own shadow leaves you when you are in darkness ~ibn taymiyyah

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                • #9
                  Re: Not a working gIRL

                  :1popcorn:

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                  • #10
                    Re: Not a working gIRL

                    AlhamduLillah i graduated about 5-6 years ago had 3 babies and now wanna go back into work/study insha'Allah. Are u married? Because as soon as they see a girl at home doing nothing its time to get hitched, lol.
                    Tell em to chill out anyway, unless they need u to pay their bills, after studying for a while u need a break.
                    "You are the best nation raised up for men. You enjoin good and forbid evil, and you believe in Allah." (Surah Al Imran 3:110)

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