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  • Abu 'Abdullaah
    started a topic Career Seeking Men

    Career Seeking Men

    The battle for 'equality' is about women being more like men. We always talk about the pitfalls of 'career-minded' women but I believe this is because men have already paved the way.

    Who is to blame? Men, for setting up and promoting the idea of chasing the dunya, or women for copying them...

    It's a lizard-hole.


  • Abu 'Abdullaah
    replied
    https://www.ummah.com/forum/forum/fa...e-to-london-uk

    Leave a comment:


  • nonameakhi
    replied
    Originally posted by Abu 'Abdullaah View Post

    Nothing wrong with that in itself but think about the sacrifices you'd have to make.
    Shame I'm time limited as this is another interesting conversation. And if you permit I would like to switch the tables a little

    The status of man is actually higher as a result of having to balance so many things but still remember his creator.

    Thanks sahaba ra would work a couple of days a year at one stage as the state provided for everything in terms of shelter and power etc. But we were given a higher status because we wouldn't have Prophet saw with us and in effect no state to provide. So we have to work and then still worship and give dawaa etc.

    The key is to ensure we don't forget our obligations and the old bird example of leaving the nest to go and find provision knowing Allah swt will not leave us hungry is apt

    ​​​​​​

    Leave a comment:


  • Saif-Uddin
    replied
    Originally posted by samin62 View Post

    Thats a problem with females using a man's scale to measure their own success

    would ve hard to change nature of men
    True,

    Feminists in a nutshell akhi, massive inferiority complex,

    جزاك الله خيرا
    Last edited by Saif-Uddin; 30-11-18, 08:36 AM.

    Leave a comment:


  • LailaTheMuslim
    replied
    I don't like the materialistic way some Muslims look at careers and work. The black and white outlook - you're either condemned for being a dunya chaser or careers and financial status is all that makes you an eligible marriage potential or someone respected in the community.

    There is nothing wrong with working hard its commendable, as well as achieving your dreams. Of course rizq lies with Allah but there are examples of wealthy prophets and prophets who came from humble backgrounds, peace and blessings of Allah be upon all of them.

    Who has the time to step aside and leave off small matters to implement the ways of these Prophets to handle wealth and poverty, nowadays?

    I would remind myself first but I'm just studying solely, left my job to focus on my final year completely.

    Actually, I guess this is my case - if I have money I'm happy and try to be grateful, when I'm poor I don't want to complain or ask for help.

    That is a very basic Islamic attitude but its an attempt.

    I think we should look at wealth, careers and education with nuance, and not disparage it as just 'dunya'.

    Its been conferred to us for a reason, and the lowly dunya is the kingdom of the disbeliever. We are given BLESSINGS to be thankful and reflect on this transitory world...

    Leave a comment:


  • samin62
    replied
    Originally posted by Abu 'Abdullaah View Post

    There is nothing wrong with a bit of healthy competition. However, it can problem when competing for dunya related stuff - and careers are usually a long term thing. It's not just a light hearted thing that you don't put much value on.

    When men go down that route and it's widely accepted as a mark of achievement that demands respect, women will naturally want to follow.
    Thats a problem with females using a man's scale to measure their own success

    would ve hard to change nature of men

    Leave a comment:


  • Saif-Uddin
    replied
    Originally posted by Abu 'Abdullaah View Post
    The battle for 'equality' is about women being more like men. We always talk about the pitfalls of 'career-minded' women but I believe this is because men have already paved the way.

    Who is to blame? Men, for setting up and promoting the idea of chasing the dunya, or women for copying them...

    It's a lizard-hole.
    Dunya chasers both guilty, but its many women who don't believe financial responsibilities on the man, they want to be independent, make a name for themselves etc, so the children/family suffer as a result.

    Messed up priorities, leading to disasterous families.
    Last edited by Saif-Uddin; 29-11-18, 06:23 AM.

    Leave a comment:


  • usernametaken
    replied
    Buying a house without a mortgage is almost impossible.
    But with higher pay it is possible to try to break the 'cycle' by creating better oppurtunities for example if someone wants to go uni, it is more likely it can be funded, depending on the job they are going for.
    Obviously that does not mean you cannot compromise either, but at least you know you tried if you had to give up a certain job/commitment for any reason.

    Leave a comment:


  • Indefinable
    replied
    Originally posted by shay5 View Post

    Sorry to hear you had a horrible experience...
    It's alright sis. May Allaah reward you for your compassion. I think it's a trait we seem to be lacking greatly.

    Leave a comment:


  • shay5
    replied
    Originally posted by Indefinable View Post

    (I didn't mention it on the main forum. I PMd Ya'sin for advice last year).
    Sorry to hear you had a horrible experience...

    Leave a comment:


  • Abu 'Abdullaah
    replied
    Originally posted by Indefinable View Post

    Deen should be given priority. But there needs to be a balance.

    There's nothing wrong with wanting to save up so you can outright own an apartment/house.

    It's security for your wife and kids.


    Nothing wrong with that in itself but think about the sacrifices you'd have to make.

    Leave a comment:


  • Indefinable
    replied
    Originally posted by Abu 'Abdullaah View Post
    That is how you get sucked in.
    Deen should be given priority. But there needs to be a balance.

    There's nothing wrong with wanting to save up so you can outright own an apartment/house.

    It's security for your wife and kids.



    Leave a comment:


  • Indefinable
    replied
    Originally posted by shay5 View Post

    What happened sis? Tell me everything...link me tothe thread
    (I didn't mention it on the main forum. I PMd Ya'sin for advice last year).

    Leave a comment:


  • usernametaken
    replied
    Originally posted by Abu 'Abdullaah View Post
    That is how you get sucked in.


    I know, but what's the alternative?
    I'm guessing it is accepting things, working just to provide, accepting any oppurtunities that arise, I don't see how that is good (unless you chosse otherwise) when pretty much everyone is working hard or accepting riba.

    Leave a comment:


  • shay5
    replied
    Originally posted by Indefinable View Post
    Never worked with men. But doubt it would be any better.

    I had that nasty experience with some sisters last year (if you remember?) - scarred me for life.

    (Yes a bit over dramatic, but since I'm getting older, I can't tolerate things as much, don't really have the patience either).
    What happened sis? Tell me everything...link me tothe thread

    Leave a comment:

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