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Why are Muslim Men Lazy?

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  • #46
    Originally posted by Sister_2009 View Post

    You said you were looking the first time when you created essentially the same thread with the same complaint. When questioned, it turned out that you weren’t even looking. Now you’ve come with another thread and say this time you’re looking, but it’s different?

    Sorry, but I spent a reasonable amount of time trying to help you the first time, as did others, only to discover that you weren’t being serious. I don’t appreciate having my time wasted, nor do I imagine others here do. The nature of the thread needed to be addressed in hopes of preventing that again, so folks here know what they’re dealing with.
    I was looking, but I took a break for a while. Sorry I didnt realize you know my situation better than I do.

    Comment


    • #47
      Originally posted by Sister_2009 View Post

      It’s the same story, which was a negative generalization about Muslim men, only to find out the individual really didn’t have that experience at all.

      We spent 18 pages trying to help her out previously. I won’t be investing anymore into this.
      I did experience those things.

      I thought you didn't want to waste your time? yet here you are again commenting. I really don't need your help if your just here to argue.

      Comment


      • #48
        Originally posted by samin62 View Post

        You are just ranting because your marriage search hasnt gone very well so far

        no need to make silly claims and blame muslim men. Makes you sound hysterical
        Right, so you ask me questions just so you can come back and insult me? Thats just immature. Dont you have anything else better to do then come here and comment on people's marriage search.

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        • #49
          Originally posted by Janna90 View Post
          Assalamu alaikoum,

          Why is it in today's society most Muslim men are getting lazier to financially provide for their families. Am not generalizing, but most Muslim men seem to have forgotten what their role is. I have only come across such a small number of men who actually have the correct islamic mindset when pursuing marriage. Alot of the time, men spend so much time criticizing independent women who work. But when it comes to looking for marriage they want you to actually work and support yourself. And if you don't work they criticize you, or undermine your choices. As if your less worthy just because you dont work. Bear in mind just because a sister doesn't work it doesn't mean she does nothing. There's so much that we do to contribute to our home and society. But it seems men overlook those qualities because there too busy thinking about money. And they want you to have your own because providing for you is such a hassle. I don't see the point of marriage if the people I keep meeting have this mentality. Or maybe am seeking something that doesn't exist. Its such a turn off when men dont act like Men. Am so put off by Muslim men, in today's society there expecting alot from you but have nothing to offer in return. Even the most basic duty for them to provide, they wont do. What is the point of marriage then. I do hope that this might be my experiences and not what all muslim men are like. But time and time again this is all I hear. No wonder alot of women are becoming independent and have to work because the men are becoming lazy. We are not going to sit around and wait for the men to provide, and when we do start doing things for ourselves and we develop goals and ambitions. All of a sudden were too much and men are intimidated because there too busy worrying about whether they can control us.

          I guess my question is why are muslim men becoming so lazy and losing the Islamic mindset? Am so put off looking for marriage.
          Wa Alaikum salaam,

          You mean they are just making ends meet, and not having surplus wealth to please gold digger wives?

          Remember we are not supposed to be Dunya chasers, and wives supposed to be content with what their husband provides and not eye the wealth of other men,

          Majority of the men, at least in west are working to provide for their families.
          Last edited by Saif-Uddin; 18-10-18, 02:44 PM.
          http://www.ilovepalestine.com/campai...imesinGaza.gif

          "It does not befit the lion to answer the dogs."

          – Imam al-Shafi’i (Rahimahullah)

          Comment


          • #50
            Originally posted by Janna90 View Post

            I did experience those things.

            I thought you didn't want to waste your time? yet here you are again commenting. I really don't need your help if your just here to argue.
            Facepalm, another gender war,

            That is your proof that men are financially lazy?

            Shall we make some nasty generalisations about Women, based on our experiences?

            Nauzubillah min zaliq,

            http://www.ilovepalestine.com/campai...imesinGaza.gif

            "It does not befit the lion to answer the dogs."

            – Imam al-Shafi’i (Rahimahullah)

            Comment


            • #51
              Originally posted by AmantuBillahi View Post

              Maybe it's different this time sister.




              Sister_2009 What would you recommend someone in this situation? How does she find a 'religious' husband without a Wali actively searching for her?
              Thanks for trying to help sis, but people will only see what they choose to see. Clearly sister_2009 is not here to help and I would rather she didn't comment on my thread.

              Comment


              • #52
                Originally posted by Saif-Uddin View Post

                Facepalm, another gender war,

                That is your proof that men are financially lazy?

                Shall we make some nasty generalisations about Women, based on our experiences?

                Nauzubillah min zaliq,
                The person must be in a imaginary world that they're in the battlefield right now fighting the oppression in muslim lands

                Comment


                • #53
                  Originally posted by Indefinable View Post
                  Generalisations are not good.

                  "Muslim" men come from a range of different backgrounds, ethnicities, cultures, upbringings, work ethics, etc. To say they are ALL or MOST of them are lazy is out of touch with reality.

                  Similarly, not all or most Muslim women are feminists (as the misrepresentation seems to be).

                  If you don't like what you see then you should look elsewhere. Try a different ethnic group?
                  No of course we shouldn't generalize, but am seeing it time and time again. So what am saying is most people I have met or conversed with, have this mentality. And its from people who do practice. I have tried asking people from all ethnic backgrounds, its not just limited to one group.

                  Comment


                  • #54
                    Originally posted by Saif-Uddin View Post

                    Wa Alaikum salaam,

                    You mean they are just making ends meet, and not having surplus wealth to please gold digger wives?

                    Remember we are not supposed to be Dunya chasers, and wives supposed to be content with what their husband provides and not eye the wealth of other men,

                    Majority of the men, at least in west are working to provide for their families.
                    Noo thats not what I mean at all.

                    I dont care if there just making ends meet or how much they earn. you completely misunderstood what am saying. Its the men that are not content with what they make so they ask me to work so i can contribute. There's nothing wrong with helping out your husband of course. But they want a household where am working and contributing, they dont want to be the breadwinner.

                    Comment


                    • #55
                      This thread should be closed.

                      Those in favour say 'aye.'

                      Comment


                      • #56
                        Originally posted by Abu 'Abdullaah View Post
                        This thread should be closed.

                        Those in favour say 'aye.'
                        Yes close it.

                        Comment


                        • #57
                          People are misunderstanding what am saying, I will not comment any further.

                          Comment


                          • #58
                            Originally posted by Janna90 View Post

                            Yes close it.
                            Don't tell me what to do.

                            >:-|

                            Comment


                            • #59
                              Originally posted by Janna90 View Post

                              I did experience those things.

                              I thought you didn't want to waste your time? yet here you are again commenting. I really don't need your help if your just here to argue.
                              Oh, please. You did not experience anything to warrant two rant threads generalizing men.

                              When asked where you were finding all these brothers who make marriage difficult, after 17 pages of back and forth, you said yourself that you weren’t really looking but heard from around that someone saw someone put on some marriage CV that some guys might hint at wanting someone who might have a job.

                              Timewaster.

                              Comment


                              • #60
                                Originally posted by Janna90 View Post

                                Thanks for trying to help sis

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